- Peter Griffin: [thinking] I want to kiss that cow, but I don't want it to be my idea.
- Cleveland Brown: Hey Peter, you should kiss that cow.
- Peter Griffin: [thinking] All right Peter, that was for two of us. But play it cool.
- [to Cleveland]
- Peter Griffin: Oh Cleveland, I couldn't.
- Cleveland Brown: Okay. Quagmire, YOU should kiss that cow.
- Glenn Quagmire: Sure, why not.
- Peter Griffin: [thinking] AAAAAAAH!
- Peter Griffin: [after accepting the key to the city] You know some of you out there are calling me a hero. Others are calling me a hoagie. Those of you from Connecticut are calling me a grinder.
- Inventor of bicycle: [bicycling a street] Eureka! Watch it go. Higher than you, faster than you, better than you... Everyone just stop inventing stuff now, 'cause no one will ever top this.
- [Children with rakes start hunting the inventor]
- Inventor of bicycle: Oh, no! Keep rakes away. I expressly said no rakes allowed on the street when I am riding my futuristic machine.
- [Children sack the inventor down and start beating him with rakes]
- Inventor of bicycle: [pleading and groaning] Children, this is progress! How can you turn a blind eye to progress?
- [at last gasping]
- Inventor of bicycle: I expressly said "no rakes"...