Bonus Stage (TV Series)

Morbid (2004)

Matt J. Wilson: Joel Dawson, Phil Argus, Elly Strife, Satan

Quotes 

• Joel Dawson : Who knew that Hell was always on the sun?

  Satan : Hey hey hey, hold on, pal. Y'know, Hell wasn't always on the sun. I mean, we had, we had to move there after the whole AC/DC ordeal. Yeah, everyone was giving the "Highway to Hell" lots of traffic, so now we have, uh, an intersection to Hell. And circle? That's purgatory.

  Joel Dawson : So rock music IS from the devil!

  Satan : Well, n-no. I mean, we, we heard the song, we thought it'd be a good idea. We thought it would, like, increase revenue, but uh, I think we didn't charge enough money. I mean, 'cause it's free, all you have to do is sin. We thought we should have the standard tire, 'cause we had so much traffic that, like, people were getting pushed off the highway. And you don't even wanna KNOW what's under the highway. That's not even Hell, that's WORSE than Hell. That's a place we call... the place where they show... that guy from the Food Network, Emeril, his TV show, they show it all the time there. Wow. Y-yeah, yeah, y'know, this, this is interesting and all, I mean, no. It isn't. When you've heard 300 million people talk to you about things that really don't concern you in any way, the definition of interesting, y'know, kind of blurs. But, uh, anyway, I gotta set you up your punishment. I mean, you're cool and all, but we gotta do this. Now, you can choose between one of the three following punishments: You have to watch "Time Squad" for 24/7, you have to watch "Shrek 2" for 24/7, or you can eat my mom's spaghetti. But I gotta warn you: It's, really bad spaghetti. I mean, even Hitler couldn't handle it. You opted for the "Time Squad", so that tells me something right there. I mean, y'know, Hitler, he's not... I mean he is kind of... so y'know, right?

  Joel Dawson : You are the worst Satan ever.