- Herself - Guest: We see the lines outside porno theatres, and we see a nice family picture with two or three people going into the theatre.
- Himself - Guest: [to Lucy] How can a woman with your success be so bitter?
- Herself - Guest: [taking a pill] I'm not bitter. I'm not bitter, darling. I'm very grateful for what I have.
- Himself - Guest: Everything you've said here is bitter
- Herself - Guest: Oh, you're full of it.
- [slaps his hand]
- Herself - Guest: Bullshit, Otto.
- Herself - Guest: They packed me up and sent me off to the happy farm before I retired.
- Herself - Guest: That was your own idea. I remember that. You wanted that.
- Herself - Guest: Oh, yeah. I mean I was a 23 year-old actress and what you're supposed to have is a nervous breakdown.
- Herself - Guest: You wanted to go back to the womb and rest.
- Himself - Host: Is that true?
- Herself - Guest: [with an indifferent flip of her hair] Sure.
- Herself - Guest: Do you know how you spend years of your life in a sexual frenzy?
- Herself - Guest: I didn't. I've been married all my life.
- Herself - Guest: I spent some time on the streets having an absolutely wonderful time behaving like a tart and a slattern for years. Maybe I got it out of my system.
- Herself - Guest: [covering her face and turning away] Oh, Elizabeth! You did not!
- Herself - Guest: [about writing her autobiography] You can't tell the truth until you're 85 and I don't want to live that long.
- Himself - Guest: Are you accusing me of being hopeless, Lucy?
- Herself - Guest: Yeah.
- Himself - Guest: Quite the contrary.
- Himself - Guest: I must confess that the whole conversation has gone over my head. I really don't understand it.
- [to Lucy]
- Himself - Guest: For once, I'm on your side.
- Himself - Guest: You cast me as the iconoclast, Kup. Anything I can do to serve you, is my great pleasure.