duke33 Reviews

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)

Better than "Spy Who Shagged Me"

[4/10 · 8 November 2004]

...but still not even a third as good as the original. There really aren't a whole lot of new joke concepts in this one. It's mostly recycled material from the first two. The only real new joke is the one with the Japanese subtitles, and even that fell a little flat. The plot is slightly better than "Spy who shagged me", but nowhere near as imaginative as the first one.

(It is also strange to note, that in the third installment, they have strayed completely from the storyline of Austin being a fish out of water after being frozen for 30 years. Perhaps they were hoping we would forget?)

Still, Mike Myers portrayal of the villain Goldmember is one of the few saving bright spots of the movie...a welcome addition to Myers' family of his characters.

Overall, I give this one four out of ten.

Shark Tale (2004)

Complete garbage...

[2/10 · 28 October 2004]

Wow...what a waste of time this movie was. All the celebrities that contributed voice-over work can't seem to save this movie laden with bad animation and a so-so plot.

The animation was really sub-par in my opinion. Maybe i've been spoiled by Pixar movies and Shrek, but it was just lousy. And, what was the deal with having to have the fish have Will Smith's head on it? Were they afraid that the general public was too stupid to recognize his voice, so they had to super-impose his face on the fish? Whatever it was, it just looked awkward.

And, the product placement in this movie was really shameful. Can Will Smith ever do a movie that isn't one giant commercial? Sure, instead of Coca-Cola it was Coral-Cola, and instead of Krispy Kreme, it was Kelpy Kremes, but you get the idea. It seems like they sold all the advertising first, and then decided to write the rest of the script around it, you know?

Overall - 2/10

Hulk (2003)

The Unbearable Hulk

[3/10 · 27 September 2004]

Somewhere, Bill Bixby must be rolling around in his grave. Ang Lee managed to take a fantastic comic book story written by the genius Stan Lee, and twist into this garbled mess of a movie. I'm not a comic book purist, so I'm not going to debate the origin of the Hulk as depicted in this movie vs the comics. However, Ang Lee's adaptation of the Hulk origin is bizarre, and frankly just not that interesting.

The acting is fine, but it's really the directing and editing of the movie that is really sub-par. The scene transitions were just nauseating...I think Ang Lee was trying to keep the movie feeling like a comic book (with the "panels" of action going on) but it didn't do it for me.

The special effects when they do show up are pretty good, but if you're looking for any big fights, then you'll be sorely disappointed. There's a scene where the hulk battles 3 dogs (granted, they were mutant dogs, but still...how lame) and another scene at the end that defies explanation, as to how stupid the fight is.

In closing, I gave it a 3 out of 10...I almost turned it off halfway through, but felt that I had already invested an hour, so I might as well watch the rest. Maybe not my best move.

Gigantic (A Tale of Two Johns) (2002)

good, if you're a die hard fan

[7/10 · 7 January 2004]

Let me start off by saying that i am a HUGE tmbg fan...i subscribed to tmbg unlimited, i go to their concerts, i even admin a tmbg site on the net. I think for rabid fans like me, this movie offers a little glimpse into what goes on behind the scenes, and does a nice job portraying the history of the band, which is something i can appreciate.

However, if i was not a tmbg fan before watching this movie, i'm not sure that this would be enough to make me run out and buy their cd's (or even download them off kazaa). Either you get this band, or you don't, and i don't see people who aren't already fans of the band being able to keep their interest and sit through the whole movie.

Then again, i might be wrong...

Chasing Amy (1997)

Funny, but...

[6/10 · 7 January 2004]

As far as pure hilarity, this movie ranks right up there with Clerks as one of Kevin Smith's finest efforts. The whole nubian/darth vader scene has me rolling each time i see it. However...the ending on this one was just too contrived, and really destroyed what i thought was a perfectly good movie. I'm not sure what kind of statement Smith was trying to make with the ending, but it seems like he could have found a better way to wrap the story up.

I would have given this an 8 or 9, but the ending forces me to drop it down to a 6.

The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Snooze...

[4/10 · 11 July 2002]

After watching Rushmore a few years back and falling completely in love with the movie, I was eagerly anticipating Anderson and Wilson's follow-up, The Royal Tenenbaums. Unfortunately, i was thoroughly bored by this movie. And, it really is a shame, since this movie has an all-star cast of great comic actors. The sad thing is that several of the actors talents, such as Bill Murray's portrayal of Raleigh St Clair, were totally wasted on this movie. Why you would take one of the great comic geniuses of our time and put him in a boring role with little to no lines, and no character development, is beyond me.

The movie was quite reminiscent of Bottle Rocket for me. There was a lot of background story, and you get the feeling that they are just building up to a greater story. However, by the time the movie really gets going, it is just about over.

There was only one scene in the movie that made me laugh, and that was the scene where Royal Tenenbaum takes his grandchildren on the town, teaching them how to create mischief. It was part of the trailer, so anyone who has seen it has seen the only funny part of this movie.

Maybe part of my disappointment was because i was wanting this movie to be another Rushmore, which is not fair on my part. However, i don't think it can begin to hold a candle to its predecessor. Rushmore was just a great story, without all the big-name actors. It just goes to show that sometimes all the big names in the world can't help a story.

Soap (1977–1981)

Timeless hilarity!

[7 January 2002]

Truthfully, i was too young to remember this show when it originally aired back in the late 70's. I do remember a lot of controversy about it, and that some stations chose to air it late rather than during primetime, because they thought it too racy.

A few years ago, I managed to catch this show on Comedy Central, and I have to admit that it is quite possibly the finest sitcom ever created. The characters were not the bland, shallow, unimaginitive figures you see on tv today. There was Jodie, the homosexual that was always unsure of his own sexuality; Chuck, the shy ventriloquist that always carried around his dummy Bob, whom Chuck thought was real, and there was NOTHING he wouldn't say; Burt, the delusional construction worker who had frequent encounters with the paranormal; Danny, the dimwit son of Burt that was mixed up in the mafia and later became a deputy sheriff; Chester, the wall street financier who slept with every woman in town except his own wife; and on and on. The cast (which includes billy crystal) was perfect...everyone played their roles so believably that you truly feel like you are watching a real dysfunctional family.

The writing and jokes were also timeless...This show was designed to take a direct pot shot at the absurdity of modern soap operas, and it hit it's mark perfectly. Most of the plotlines were like something out of a supermarket tabloid which always added to the hilarity of the show. Burt being abducted by aliens, burt thinking he can make himself invisible by snapping his fingers, jessica being captured by central american freedom fighters, jodie's baby being possessed by satan, etc...

Even 20+ years later, this show will not disappoint. While it may be tame by today's standards, it was clearly a pioneer that paved the way for a lot of today's programming.

Junkyard Wars (1998–2009)

Best Show on TV...hands down!

[31 December 2001]

This is far and away the best show on TV today. Each show's format is the same: take 2 teams, give them an object to build, and let them loose in a junkyard. They are allowed to use anything they find in the junkyard, but they only have 10 hours to complete the build. Previous challenges have included: hovercrafts, canons, fireboats, and even steam powered cars! Given the fact that the teams have only 10 hours, and all the parts are built from scrap, it often leads to some very entertaining competitions on race day.

This show combines several elements that make the show entertaining to people of all demographics...While this program showcases competition and humour, it is truly an educational show deep at heart; however, it is so subtle and fun that you do not realize that you are learning while watching.

Whether you are 7 years old or are 70, trust me, you will love this show!

Pee-wee's Big Adventure (1985)

A Comedy For All Ages

[10/10 · 4 December 2001]

Wow, where to start with this movie? I remember being 11 years old when i first saw this movie, and my friend and i thought it was one of the funniest things we had ever seen! Lots of clever catch phrases and a wacky plot just made this movie hilarious! And now, 16 years later, this movie makes me laugh just as much, if not more. This movie has it all, from slapstick and physical humour to more subtle humour, there is something for everyone. The directing by Tim Burton was first-rate, and the score by Danny Elfman (The Simpsons, Oingo Boingo, Batman) was incredible. It was perfect for this movie. Oh, and there are some great cameos by Morgan Fairchild and James Brolin at the end of the movie that are just a riot! Trust me, forget any of your preconceived notions of who you think pee wee herman is, rent this movie, and just enjoy.

Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)

Complete 180 Turn From the Original

[1/10 · 22 October 2001]

I thought the first Austin Powers was one of the funniest movies i have seen in ages. An intelligent satire of the whole James Bond motif, with several take-offs that were direct pot shots at the bond movies.

But, when the sequel came out, I just had a nagging feeling that there was no way it could be half as good as the original. And, boy oh boy, did they really miss the mark on this one.

My first feeling when watching this movie was that Mike Myers had a bunch of jokes in his head, and he wrote them down. Then, they tried to tie them together with a loosely knit storyline. The result is that most of the jokes are not funny, and the story seems to wander quite a bit. Also, all sense of james bond satire is gone, save for a few scenes at the end.

Overall, i was very disappointed in this one. I sincerely doubt i'll shell out the money to see AP3 when it comes out, after this debacle.

Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)

It was OK...

[4/10 · 21 September 2001]

Let me start out by saying that like most people here, I am a Kevin Smith fan. I thought clerks and chasing amy were great movies from a brilliant director. Superb acting, great jokes, and great characters.

Unfortunately, his newest movie, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, has none of those things. First of all, let me point out that these characters are not the same Jay and Silent Bob many of you will remember from Clerks. They were annoying, drug-dealing losers who played a small role in the movie. Somewhere along the way, however, they became lovable goons that are the center of a movie. I'm not sure these characters are well developed enough to be the main characters.

Anyways, on to the movie. This movie starts out SLLLOOOOWWWWW...It was too bad that they bring back lots of great characters like Randall, Dante, and Brody, but only for quick cameo shots. None of them offer anything to this movie. It takes a while, but finally the jokes start rolling. Sadly, Kevin Smith kind of gave in to the "American Pie" movie style, which is just making lewd comments and sexual jokes. There is no intelligent, insightful dialogue, as you are used to from his other movies.

I think that the one bright spot of the movie was Chris Rock's character. He displays the charm and wittiness that you have come to know from characters like Banky, Randall, Hooper X, etc.

Overall, i would give this movie 4 stars out of 10. There are some funny spots, but they do not really start until about halfway through the movie.

The Distinguished Gentleman (1992)

Did i see the same movie as everyone else????

[1/10 · 10 August 2001]

Hmmm...I must be in the silent minority on this one. I thought this movie was absolutely atrocious. The plot was flimsy, the film moved WAY to fast at the beginning, and the big conspiracy was about power lines causing cancer...It was sad that was the best they could come up with. If you want to see truly great acting by Eddie Murphy, rent Bowfinger, Coming to America, or Trading Places. If you want to see a jumbled mess, watch this movie instead.

In the Company of Men (1997)

What a waste

[1/10 · 10 November 2000]

I really don't see what the appeal of this movie is for most people...I watched it, and i must say that i was honestly bored throughout most of the movie. I thought the acting was poor, the characters not believable, and the surprise ending wasn't really all that riveting. After the ending, i just sat there saying "that's all? that's the ending?" It just didn't seem to end right. It's not like i was put off by the subject matter, it's just that the plot seemed aimless and I couldn't get into the movie.

Overall, 2 out of 10 stars.

Mitchell (1975)

"Mitchell a lot of people don't like you...why is that?"

[2/10 · 10 November 2000]

All i can say about this movie is "wow". Not that i'm blown away by it, but that i can't believe that joe don baker and linda evens were that hard up for cash to make this bowser.

The script is pretty flimsy, sometimes with 2 or 3 subplots going their own directions and then somehow overlapping, yet it doesn't quite work. There are so many "bad guys" yet for some reason you can never quite figure out who is crossing whom, and what each person's relation to each other is. Towards the end, it starts to become more apparent, but it's still not that exciting.

Then, Joe Don Baker as Mitchell really does a poor job...I don't think it's his fault..just that the character was not that likeable. I mean, a boozing slob of a cop is not exactly what you think of when you think of great detectives...

I agree that this movie is amusing if you watch the MST3K version of it...in fact it's one of my favorites, just because they jab Joe Don and this movie EVERY chance they can get, and I'd say that it's more than deserving of every single one.

Overall - one and a half out of ten stars.

Mystery Men (1999)

Good "stupid" movie...

[7/10 · 25 August 2000]

A lot of the user comments i have seen on the IMDB for this movie don't really do it justice. First of all, let me just say that this movie is not to be taken seriously. It's supposed to be a fun, yet stupid movie, that doesn't require one to think, only to enjoy it. If you watch this movie with the intent to see a masterpiece in either filmmaking or in humour, then you will be sorely disappointed. Yet, if you want to just watch a goofy movie with some talented actors/actresses, and some good catch-phrases, then you will enjoy it.

The Haunting (1999)

The most awful film I have ever seen

[1/10 · 30 July 1999]

Tonite I had the unfortunate experience of sitting through this pathetic excuse for a movie. First of all, the story (which is weak) takes too long to develop, and when it finally does develop, you are saying to yourself "my god, is this the best they could come up with?" The special effects, while maybe good, become annoying and you soon finding yourself questioning your own sanity as the characters lose theirs. And that brings me to my next point...the characters are not identifiable to the average person. I felt no sympathy to any of them, save for maybe the comic-relief guy. Anyways, save your seven dollars.