ilovelucy77 Reviews

Carried Away (1996)

Ewwww Dennis Hopper Nude

[17 May 2005]

Oh my God! I finished watching "Carried Away." How disturbing! I can't see how someone as young and sexy as Amy Locane would find someone who looks like Dennis Hopper sexually arousing. Hot babes like that do not go for old men unless they are wealthy.

***spoilers ahead*** Those sex scenes in "Carried Away" between Dennis Hopper and Amy Locane as well as the one sex scene between Amy Irving and Dennis Hopper looked so real it made "Wild Things" look like a kids' movie. This should be considered a porn film.

I could have been spared the full frontal nudity of Dennis Hopper before his character had sex with Amy Irving's character. And it was odd that she did frontal nudity in this film when she swore against doing it in "Carrie." Then again, Amy Irving was a lot younger when she did "Carrie."

The Hot Chick (2002)

Not Bad

[20 December 2002]

I saw this movie with an old high school friend and while it certainly is not Academy Award material it really wasn't bad for a comedy to rent on a rainy day. Rob Schneider stole the show with his acting skills as a beautiful high school Queen Bee stuck in a man's body. I thought the whole bit with Keecia a/k/a LingLing's mom was a little silly. But there were some clever jokes. It probably could have been better if they worked on the plot and script a little more.

Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)

This sucked so miserably!

[26 October 2002]

Bring back the shape! Oh, they did. Now, I see why! This was the worst, need I say the worst, did I say the worst, yes, I said the WORST horror movie I have ever seen in my entire life.

This may contain spoilers.

I love the Halloween films. But, it's the whole Michael Myers/Laurie Strode thing that makes the series. Okay, I may not have minded a new story line if this wasn't so bad. The acting was okay, but the plot was a little thin. Why did Cochran want to kill all the kids on Halloween night? They never quite explained his motive, which would have been key to making this film survive. Cochran was going to air a commercial with somewhat unexplained special powers to cause children wearing the Silver Shamrock masks to undergo dangerous mutations leading to mass deaths all over the country. He would make sure every child would watch TV at 9:00 for a special "surprise" and wear his or her mask simultaneously for disastrous results. I really didn't have to watch several victims, including a kid die in such a gruesome way. How offensive!

So, it's up to this doctor (a known alcoholic) to stop the toymaker's evil plot, yet nobody believes him, and certainly not his bitterly angry estranged ex-wife (Nancy Loomis a/k/a Nancy Kyes, who played Annie Brackett in the original Halloween), who purchases their children Silver Shamrock masks and accuses her ex of being an unattentive father. Here we go, there's another drunk doctor in the picture. (Remember Dr. Mixter from Halloween II?) And I was shocked! Why did they make Nancy Loomis look so much older? The film was made only a year after Halloween II, and although she played a dead Annie Brackett she looked young there.

And they must have played that stupid commercial to the tune of "London Bridges" a million times. I found that scarier than the movie itself. The only good part of it was when they featured some parts of the original Halloween when Cochran has Dr. Challis tied up in a chair in front of the TV set.

Valentine (2001)

Too much left to the imagination -- SPOILER ALERT!!!!

[31 July 2001]

I was so looking forward to knowing for sure during this movie whether or not the psycho killer was indeed Jeremy, the geek who the five girlfriends picked on and rejected at a sixth grade dance, however (spoilers ahead) the unmasking of the killer in the end led to a whole lot of confusion. I kept saying after the conclusion of the movie, "Well, maybe it was Jeremy. No, maybe the killer wasn't the same person as the one at the dance." So many elements in the movie contradicted each other. For example, (SPOILER) one girl Dorothy tells her boyfriend to go somewhere and he gets killed. Dorothy's archrival, an ex of her boyfriend, yells at her and gets killed shortly thereafter. So, I suspected her the rest of the movie. But, she received a weird Valentine, too, so how could she have sent it to herself? That would be pointless to show. Then, there's this useless scene where the cop hits on Paige (Denise Richards' character). What's up with that? Was he meant to be thought of as a suspect by viewers? They say that Jeremy might have gotten plastic surgery, so we're inclined to believe that the killer is one of the girl's boyfriends or dates. Then, we see Dorothy complaining that she was the least popular of all the friends and that she resents them all (all the more I think she's the killer). Then, it comes to the unmasking and we see someone we don't want to believe is the killer, but the person they unmask in the end of the movie wasn't the actual killer but someone wearing the same mask as the killer (That's what I'm guessing. I'm not sure). The real killer (I assume this person was) is shown in the end having a nose bleed, like the masked character always had each time he killed someone. But, then there is not enough evidence that the real killer is Jeremy. You know the person with the nosebleed did the killings, but they don't successfully connect them to the kid. They say his parents died in a fire after he went to the mental institution, but then they don't ever say whether or not Jeremy started the fire. The dialogue and plot were so vague, it's easy to assume that it could have been some other person who was in the girls' lives and just happened to be a psycho killer. You don't hear much about the killer's past life, only that the person is someone in the girls' personal lives in the present. The killer does make statements that indicate insecurity but doesn't say enough to indicate that he/she is Jeremy. It was just a mess. They could have edited the script better before releasing the movie.

American Psycho (2000)

Offensive & Gross......Avoid at ALL Costs, Ladies Especially!!!

[8 May 2000]

I don't know why, but my local newspaper gave American Psycho such rave reviews. So, reading that review coupled with the fact that I like Reese Witherspoon as an actress, I was dying (no pun intended) to see it. I'm a horror fan who rarely gets nightmares and can leave visions of terror on the screen once the film is over, and though this film isn't intended to be horror but suspense, it managed to scare me and give me nightmares. It isn't the kind of fright that's fun and enjoyable like that which comes from the adrenaline rush you get watching chase scenes in "Halloween" or "Scream." It's one that disturbs and offends.

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!!

Set in the 1980's, the title "American Psycho" chronicles the daily life of a young 27-year-old prematurely successful Wall Street businessman who, by night, is a murderous psycho with disgusting tastes in film and a proclivity to kill graphically & imaginatively. Nice! He makes Skeet Ulrich's "Scream" character look like Mickey Mouse. Reese Witherspoon's talent is wasted; she only appears briefly in a few scenes as the woman who so wants to marry Christian Bale's psycho killer Patrick Bateman, unaware, of course, that her man is a murderous sociopath quite capable of killing her, too. Patrick manages to kill off a few acquaintances & friends throughout the film. You end up scared out of your mind every time he has dialogue with each of the characters. He manages to incorporate lewd sexual acts with some of his killing rituals. He also obsesses over porn, song lyrics, & "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" from which he collects some of his ideas for killing people & dealing with the remains afterward. He's like a financially successful, handsome, heterosexual Hollywood version of Jeffrey Dahmer. And, yes, like Dahmer, Patrick also takes pleasure in cruelty to animals. It gets no better throughout the whole movie. While I was expecting there to at least be a point to this sick plot in the end, I was disappointed by a discouraging and unrealistic ending.

The film is somewhat like "The Talented Mr. Ripley" (though that was a good movie) meets "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" with a pornographic rich Wall Street yuppie twist. Patrick's saner Wall Street colleagues are sexist pigs who show no respect for women, and Patrick himself exerts his dominance over them in the sex scenes in a most annoyingly medieval fashion. The film features few women on Wall Street; most of them are spoiled socialites aiming to marry someone like the wealthy Patrick. I've heard feminists in political debates accuse Corporate America of discriminating against and insulting women, but this film insults women and Wall Street at the same time. Ladies & businesspeople keep away! For that matter, everyone should keep away from this horrid film.

Titanic (1997)

A Masterpiece So Real I Was Disturbed (ONE SPOILER!)

[6 April 2000]

Okay, this movie disturbed me. It was so beautifully made that it managed to trouble me, knowing that, aside from the tender romance between Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet's characters, this was based upon events that actually happened in the early 1900's - a ship called the Titanic sank and that many people did actually die in the same ways graphically portrayed in this film, which deserves its status as a modern classic.

The romance between DiCaprio and Winslet is what made me develop a serious crush on Leonardo DiCaprio. Wonderful love story! SPOILER AHEAD: The only objection I had was that they killed off Leo's character and let the bad guy (who was engaged to Winslet's character and who we hear later commits suicide during the Great Depression) survive. Long live LEO!!!!! Titanic gets a 9/10.

Sex and the City (1998–2004)

Sexy and Easy to Relate To

[25 March 2000]

I'm somewhat annoyed when people trash this show because of the sexual habits of its stars. Certainly, I wouldn't advocate promiscuity or unsafe sex nor would I have sex with the frequency and variety that these women have it, but I think it's about time Hollywood takes the lead in dispelling stereotypes of women as being trashy for having sex "like men" (a line in an earlier episode). Oftentimes, women are frowned upon for enjoying sex, while men get away with having many partners and not being denounced as "sluts."

"Sex and the City"'s portrayal of working women in New York defies that view, but more importantly it's merely great entertainment. The stories are well-written, and the characters are developed beautifully: Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker) as the writer who discusses people's sex lives, Miranda, the lawyer, Charlotte, who is somewhat of a good girl who takes advice from her friends-for better or worse, and Samantha, the wild, adventurous party girl. To those of you declaring "Sex and the City" a tool in destroying young teenaged girls by introducing them to promiscuity and early first intercourse, consider this: don't show this to your young daughters. This is an adult series for adults to watch and envision an adult thing: sex.

As for their number of lovers, it's only TV. They have to have different guys each episode because it wouldn't be as interesting otherwise. This is not to suggest that we should have a new partner every week. The show just explores different things that can happen in sexual relationships, and promiscuity aside, some of the dialogue presented in a given episode is, in fact, representative of what women talk about when they're with their female friends.

Drowning Mona (2000)

Springer Could Have Waited For Tips From This Before Making His Movie

[6 March 2000]

"Drowning Mona" was absolutely hilarious! I loved it! It's one of those films that spoofs poor white trash. This film spoofs trashy people from a small isolated hick town in upstate New York where everyone knows each other. I noticed a lot of people were comparing this film to Jerry Springer. I definitely agree that all of the characters were typical Springer guests. I wish Jerry Springer waited until this film came out before he made Ringmaster, which bombed. He (and his writers) could have gotten brilliant ideas for his script. "Drowning Mona" treats poor white trash perfectly.

This film enabled its entire cast, many of them big name stars playing characters we aren't used to seeing them as, to challenge themselves in their acting careers. They met the challenge successfully. I'm so used to seeing Bette Midler play a warm-hearted, sweet, motherly lady, but what a treat to see her portray Mona, a mega-bitch whom everyone in town justifiably hates. She was one of those people whose funeral you wouldn't cry at. And then, there's Danny DeVito. He usually plays humorous characters, yet he was a stern chief of police trying to solve Mona's murder, probably the most serious character in the movie. Neve Campbell contrasts her wholesome Scream character by playing DeVito's daughter Ellen, Casey Affleck's character Bobby's whiny fiancee. Jamie Lee Curtis, who had her big break as a wholesome good girl in the Halloween series, is a slutty waitress hopping from one guy's bed to another. Will Ferrell, from Saturday Night Live, also appears; his film career is on the way up.

Watch Mona drown and think about someone universally disliked for their unbridled cruelty!

Lisa (1990)

Yes, Cute Guys Can Be Psychos, Too, Girls! Watch Out!

[2 March 2000]

This was a beautifully crafted suspense thriller about an overprotected 14-year-old girl named Lisa (played by Staci Keanan) who, in her innocent attempts to have some involvement with the opposite sex, becomes tied up in conversing by phone with a handsome guy, who unknown to her is the crazed serial killer responsible for several murders of young single women in the area where she and her single mom live.

Staci Keanan and Cheryl Ladd made a wonderful mother-daughter team. There are many suspenseful moments involving Lisa and the killer, yet the whole time she has no clue just how dangerous this handsome young man she stalks really is. It would make any teen think twice before trying to pick up a handsome stranger. I was thirteen when this film was first released in 1990. "Lisa" sure scared the hell out of me when I first saw it.

Drop Dead Gorgeous (1999)

Has a moral but is otherwise STUPID

[20 February 2000]

This film, I believed from the previews, was supposed to be about pushy, competitive mothers and their equally competitive daughters who participate in beauty pageants. (SPOILERS AHEAD!!!) Drop Dead Gorgeous looked like it had potential, but it didn't live up to it.

Kirstie Alley's character Gladys Leeman goes to such extreme lengths to ensure that her daughter Becky (Denise Richards - beauty queen of all beauties) wins their hometown Miss Teen American Princess pageant, a fraudulent, crooked pageant sponsored by a cosmetics company that would begin with a local town pageant, lead to a state pageant and end with the national pageant. I will spoil it here, so don't read on if you want to see it. It's the part that makes the film unfunny. Gladys Leeman goes so far as to even kill contestants off to limit the competition for her snotty, shallow daughter Becky. Her most hated object is, of course, the sweet, kind, considerate girl who grew up in a trailer park - Amber Atkins, who dreams of being an anchorwoman and is the only character in the entire picture with a good head on her shoulders. The one moral that Gladys' hatred of Amber (and murder of the other girls) teaches is how damaging envy can be and how it makes people do evil things. Okay, that's the only good part. The bad part is that the humor just wasn't funny, and in some parts the plot was beginning to stray from its main point. There would be too much emphasis on one joke. And, the ending (SPOILER AHEAD) was downright offensive. Yes, Denise Richards' character was a super bitch, but it wasn't funny the way they killed her off (an accidental flame set to the gasoline that filled the float on which she was standing). I just didn't think it was funny to see someone die, both Becky and the girls her mother killed.

And what is worse is that Amber doesn't turn out to be that sweet after all. When she gets to the state pageant, she does something not deadly but nonetheless dishonorable to get the crown. She pulls a nasty prank on all the other contestants. No sympathetic characters, but a lot of stereotypes! No wonder my local paper gave it the worst review they could give.

Mad TV (1995–2016)

What is this garbage?

[5 February 2000]

I've seen a few episodes of Mad TV, and frankly, I've found none of them funny, just annoyingly corny. Mad Magazine was funny, but this TV version of the publication is a downright embarrassing insult to its source. I haven't laughed once and almost fell asleep at one point. The Bottom Line: YAWN! YAWN!

Saturday Night Live (1975– )

I absolutely LOVE this show!

[23 January 2000]

I love this show to pieces! I would want to be a celebrity for no other reason than to host Saturday Night Live and act in some of the sketches, most specifically Tim Meadows' skit where he plays Leon Phelps, the Ladies' Man. The most recent cast is as great as ever: Will Ferrell, Chris Kattan, Molly Shannon, Cheri Oteri, Ana Gasteyer, among others.

I spoke to my friend who doesn't like SNL but thinks Mad TV is funnier, so I watched an episode of Mad TV and I thought it was HORRIBLE! The jokes were corny, and the sketches were disorganized. Plus, Mad TV went too far on some occasions, so far that it was more offensive than funny. So in my book, Saturday Night Live wins the medal. Nobody can beat an original work. Overall, what makes Saturday Night Live funny is that it's politically incorrect and lets go. It's offensive in a hilarious way. Mad TV, on the other hand, is offensive in a disgusting and sometimes corny way. That doesn't surprise me, since Mad Magazine is rather offensive. LONG LIVE "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE"!!!!!!!!

Carrie (1976)

This film cannot be surpassed.

[11 January 2000]

This has got to be one of my favorite horror movies of all time. Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie were beautifully cast as the telekinetic teen outcast and her crazed religiously fanatic mother who is no help to her daughter who suffers perpetual humiliation and mistreatment from her classmates at her high school.

(Spoilers ahead)

The element that made Carrie a phenomenal film was the development of Spacek's lead character. There was such a contrast between her personality and what she ended up doing in the end. Throughout the film, you find that Carrie has been so unmercifully tormented at school that you don't mind what she does to all her cruel classmates in the end. When I first saw the film, I found it scary because I kept thinking of Carrie as an innocent, mousy harmless person, then, unexpectedly, she embarks on a violent telekinetic rage after the popular crowd pulls a nasty prank on her at the prom by making her Prom Queen only to dump pig's blood on her. She ends up killing all of her classmates there except for the nice popular girl who tried to help her. Carrie turns out to be a tough, dangerous vengeful character after all. Watch out! After seeing this film a few times, though, it no longer scared me but in a way disturbed me. You can really feel sorry for Carrie. She was so shy, timid, and helpless. I give this film a 10/10. I bought it and made it part of my horror film collection.