Change Your Image
English-Teacher-Matthew
Reviews
Couples Come Dine with Me: Southend (2014)
You might have missed my guest
Appeared on this episode. You would have noticed me making potato salad sitting in a dark room.
The reason was in part being ashamed of my girlfriend Hayley who I hid from my other guests.
Sounds really mean but I did say to a friend when we first met, 'I don't think that was her, that was a man right'?
She has recently had a neck reduction but that's another story.
I hate Kevin Maher by the way! Average at best!
Last of the Longnecks (2017)
I misunderstood
I thought this was about the life story of my childhood sweetheart Hayley Cropper (who I mistook for a man on our first encounter).
Silly me. Just about dinosaurs.
Pretty good though and family friendly very much like Virgins or Sherwood Forest.
No (2012)
I finally understand
Having been told many times in the past 'no means no' I had to try to appreciate the full meaning of the word.
I now fully understand and can confirm I now agree. No means no, not yes.
The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
Undecided
Having never watched this movie I thought it would be unfair to over or under score it. Standard 5 out of 10 is fair in my eyes.
Sitting here doing a poo I wonder what went through the director & writers mind to create this 'movie'.
Having wiped & done my research I can see that previous film credits such as the Virgins of Sherwood Forest & Freddie Got Fingered tells me all I need to know. These guys are obviously geniuses.
Perhaps I'll watch this and review tomorrow, maybe not. I might just watch some re-runs of Southend United vs Bolton.
Dude, Where's My Car? (2000)
I am Matt Ing and I am...
The keeper of the continuum transfunctioner.
Zoltan.
American Pie (1999)
Reminds me of my youth..& strangely my future
This was the movie franchise of my youth. So many great memories.
I have an inkling that I will become Jim's dad in the future though.
Rolando Villazón - Ein mexikanischer Traum (2007)
Wonderful
Based on the wonderful career of my estranged twin. This is an amazing tribute to the guy I can now call my brother.
I know in the past I have compared many a film to Virgins of Sherwood Forest, DEEP Impact & Lesbian Vampire Killers but this really this fantastic. I love you Rolando!
Beyond Sherwood Forest (2009)
Not what I thought
I thought this was the long awaited sequel to Virgins of Sherwood Forest. I realised after 5 minutes that this was a serious piece of drama.
I decided to watch Deep Impact instead.
The Lord of the G-Strings: The Femaleship of the String (2003)
Really?
This has got nothing on Virgins of Sherwood Forest.
Deep Impact (1998)
Good movie, not what I expected...
After watching Virgins of Sherwood Forest I needed to find another movie of the same ilk.
My friend suggested I watch Deep Impact.
It wasn't exactly the movie genre I set out to see.
Never the less a thoroughly enjoyable movie.
8 Mile (2002)
Fantastic - soundtrack was decent
When I first watched this movie I thought 'Yes'.
After listening to the soundtrack I thought 'Ok'.
Now I've watched it again after many years I've come to the conclusion, it's not as good as Virgins of Sherwood Forest.
Virgins of Sherwood Forest (2000)
Throwback Classic
I remember first watching this movie when Craig Morgan brought it into school. At first I thought like everyone else it was funny, bit of a laugh, banter.
How wrong was I! When it was 'my turn' to borrow the VHS for the weekend I just thoroughly enjoyed it. I probably enjoyed it too much in fact.
I even watched it when my friends came over and I pretty much ignored them the whole time they were there.
To sum up this is my favourite film and I just want everyone to know really.