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netherhole
Reviews
Me and Will (1999)
This "movie" was horrible...
Maybe this is the celluloid version of the "vanity press." Whatever you call it, DON'T call it the "female version of 'Easy Rider' and DON'T call it "one of the most perfect independent films out there." Two words...it sucked!
Have you ever been watching what looked like would be a good movie, and suddenly found yourself rooting AGAINST the two lead characters - virtual cardboard cutouts completely devoid of any charm, energy and acting talent? Well, watch this piece of crap and you will have that experience, just like I did! Plot? Nah...just something an 8-year old might slap together on a handheld during an afternoon stuck indoors on a rainy day.
Where was that Cary Loftin guy from Spielberg's old TV movie "Duel?" He could have ended this movie in the first 15 minutes, with a high-speed chicks-on-choppers flattening scene, with the gas tanker truck then jackknifing and rolling, ending it all in a blazing inferno...roll credits and the audience would have stood up and cheered! Sounds like Oscar material for a short film...Too bad that didn't happen. Watch this "movie" at your own risk!
Rating? Huh? Zip.
Coyote Ugly (2000)
How can I get back those 100 minutes of my life??
Without a doubt, one of the worst ideas for a movie of all-time. Where do I start? Well, it is not worth writing more than a few brief comments so as to dissuade others from watching this dreck. Based upon a true story? Who knows...who cares! The "story" is BAD and is not worthy of a movie treatment.
The lead, Piper Perabo, looks like a cheap imitation of another actress, Sarah Jessica Parker, neither of whom possess much talent. When Piper adds to the mix her character's whining, sad-ass life story, it is comes across as an annoying Kristy McNichol imitation...remember how hard that brooding delivery was to take in the TV show "Family?"...well, multiply that by about 10, and you end up with "Jersey," a character every viewer wants to instantly hate.
This movie is like the female version of "Cocktail," minus the talent and budget. I truly am surprised that nobody tried to shoot "Jersey" when she was playing her "music" on the roof. Only her next-door neighbor had it right, by smashing and banging on the adjoining wall to her rat's nest of a hovel (a.k.a. apartment) the very instant she began playing her horrid version of what was supposed to pass for "music." Clearly, there must have been neighboring penthouse units nearby, and unfortunately there was no Vietnam Vet sniper living in one of them to pick her off when she was on the roof. I guarantee he would have done anything to get her to stop playing. A cat fight would sound better than her worthless renderings.
Do NOT see this movie, unless you were thinking of "retiring" your TV with your foot kicked through the screen. -1,000,000 on a scale of 1 to 10.