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Reviews
Die Another Day (2002)
good popcorn movie, keeps true to the series
Die Another Day will not disappoint. It provides excellent action scenes and the prerequisite explosions for any big budget popcorn movie. Pierce Brosnan does a fine job in the movie, although it looks like he has never picked up a sword or a cigar in his life.
Halle Berry does fine work in the movie portraying Jinx, the American NSA agent. One interesting part of the film absent in previous films is a bit of strife between American and British forces. They have similar goals, but their agents and administrators clash a bit during the film.
I have an affinity for the "real" Bond movies (read: w/ Connery) but I really enjoyed this one. You go in expecting Bond, not fine cinema, and you leave satisfied.
Negatives of the movie include a HORRIBLE title song by Madonna and equally retched cameo. The score is excellent, and features a Clash song prominently. The plot is a bit transparent and gets a bit fantastical, almost cartoonish in the last 30 minutes.
There are references to other Bond movies in the film (Halle's Ursula Andress swimsuit and a Diamond ad that says "diamonds are forever") that should amuse the Bond-nerds like myself.
The sexual innuendos, always a staple of Bond films, were predictable and not very clever. Also, the CGI seemed a bit over the top at times- the "iceberg surfing" scene comes to mind. Icarus seems to have the power to ravage icebergs and sold ground but it takes minutes to melt an ice house and only damages the Villain's plane.
Go see this one expecting an above-average movie in the Bond series and you wont be disappointed. Let the bad parts, when they come, roll of your back and you wont be too distracted.
The plot is clearly defined in this one, and I am very happy to see the resurgence of Communist Villains.
See it in the theatres or on DVD. THere isnt much else out this holiday that pleases.
7/10
Josh Kirby: Time Warrior! Chap. 5: Journey to the Magic Cavern (1996)
Turn the Cheese to 11!!!
Josh Kirby, Time Warrior...undoubtedly one of the greatest stories ever told. Well, not really. But it does include some of the worst dialogue this side of MST3K movies. Sets are poorly done, and the costumes are laughably bad.
This whole series was shot in Eastern Europe over the course of a year. You might recognize Irwin 1138 as the voice of Basil in the Great Mouse Detective. You might recognize Ding Dong the Mushroom as the Lady midget in Little Nicky. But you better recognize the greatness of this movie, or you will be punished according to the 21 codes of Kang.
This movie is a Kitsch classic. Watch it if you enjoy movies so bad they are good.