Lmader45 Reviews

Bad Teacher (2011)

Could get your blood pumping. Mainly through violent outbursts.

[3/10 · 11 July 2011]

The synopsis for Bad Teacher is as thus. A shallow, hot sociopath teacher is going to do whatever she can in order to afford a life changing boob job.

The movie is really about two other things though.

An attempt at crude jokes as Diaz competes with another teacher for Timberlake's affections.

And eye candy.

In regards to the former point, it fails heavily for many reasons.

Firstly, the jokes aren't funny.

Secondly, the characters are so annoying in this movie you want to punch every one of them in the face whenever they open their mouths.

Thirdly, this hate stems from the characters being so nauseatingly unrealistic. Some may suggest they are meant to be annoying. But there is a vast difference between annoying and having a personality that the Dalai Lama would be driven to kill over.

Fourthly, now because these characters are so unrealistic it means the story jumps around without making a lot of sense. While it doesn't take an average I.Q to keep up with the story, it's still blatantly obvious that scenes explaining events were ripped out to try to keep the movie flowing.

The biggest failure on all these behalves is that the movie is not funny, the characters suck and no matter how much they cut the movie up, it's still around an hour to long.

Now in regards to the sex appeal of this movie, I can't help.

See, to me, since free and explicitly messed up internet porn became readily available of sexy women, who are also 20 years younger then Cameron Diaz, I have not gotten remotely excited at the idea of sitting through an hour and a half of bad jokes to see an attractive middle aged woman strut around in revealing clothing.

Or a set of random boobs.

But that's just me.

Call me simple, or cheap, but when the only block between me and 1000 videos of XXX sexy teacher fantasies complete with corny one-liners and hard core scenes is a simple search engine, I fail to understand the 'pulling power' of a terrible movie with a hot woman who doesn't get naked.

But each to their own. Cause this movie is still freakin terrible.

Skins (2007–2013)

Don't let sensationalist ads sway you from watching this drama

[9/10 · 9 June 2011]

For the last year or so I've seen ads for the show 'Skins' on cable in Australia and the selling point was always that the show featured British teenagers using drugs and having sex. Basically, it was sold with the tag-line 'If you think Gossip Girl is bad, check out what these naughty Brit teens get up to' and featured heavy focus on this aspect only.

This is a massive shame because the Brits, as usual, have outdone the Yanks hands down with their ability to under-pin the true essence of drama.

After watching Season 1 on DVD I am in awe at the brilliance of the writers and actors associated with this show. True character depth prevails in every episode.

Skins enables you to empathize with and understand the teenagers while showing both the glossy facade exterior all teens put on for their peers and family and also the hidden self-doubting, ever questioning and confused side teens hide so well.

Plot twists aren't used as an excuse to shock and awe viewers but to remind us that we can all be fallible or responsible to those around us by our actions, whether they be bad or good.

No character is to rich, to poor, to proper, to sadistic, to smart or to dumb to relate to. Some story lines can push the extent of realism. But far more people out there will still relate to these characters then most teenagers in reality TV shows.

Like a lot television shows, if you find yourself wondering whether to continue with it after watching the first episode, definitely make sure you invest the time to watch episode 2 of Skins. With any pilot show you need to introduce a lot of characters in a short space of time. So episode 2 definitely lays down the foundations for how strong, relevant and dramatic this show is.

The Combination (2009)

Forget the Leb/Aussie crap. Plainly its a good film.

[8/10 · 8 July 2009]

When Australia makes any dramas set in the burbs they generally always have the feel of being written by someone with not only a separation from suburban life but utter contempt for it as well. The characters are flagrant stereotypes, the dialogue has the feel it was written by a 5 year old trying to sound tough and the stories always generally deal with the idea that growing up in the burbs gives you 2 opportunities. Mundane blue collar jobs or pursuing criminal enterprise.

While the combination does include the final element in it's story, it does not offer it as the only choice for the burbs either. And it skillfully shows that each person has a choice and must take responsibility for their actions.

Well written, starring an amazing cast and finally giving a sense of realism to suburban life in Australia, The Combination is a great film.

Being a Sydney 'westie' I can't get over the aspect of dialogue in this film. Finding an Australian film that does not come across as a parody in the way characters interact with each other is nearly impossible. Even within a great film like Two Hands if you watch the movie again note the absence of free flowing dialogue that feels real. This film has it down pat. The characters seem undeniably real. George Basha has done a great job. Let's hope he is not a one trick pony and can use his skills for further great Australian films in the future.

Sex Drive (2008)

Why aren't they being sued?

[1/10 · 22 December 2008]

You know when two people from the same family have a kid it can result in down syndrome....

So when I say that Sex Drive is the love child of 'American Pie' and 'Road Trip' I am referring to it in that manner, not as a compliment! 1. The main character, Ian, is an absolute rip off of Jim from American Pie, but without the heart or empathy that Jim garnered.

2. He's older brother and best friend are both part Stifflers. The older brother plays the jerk who makes gay references the entire time, while he's best friend plays the objectifying and womanizing lothario. Unfortunately, you actually liked Stiffler though. Of course you did. We all know who Sean William Scott is now. If nobody had heard of X-men then James Marsden would have just killed he's career even more so.

3. The best friend, the womanizer, is played by a fat dorky guy named Clark Duke. Makes sense. Women are falling over themselves to sleep with the fat dorky guy. But wait, he's referred to as cool in the movie! Why? Nobody knows. He never does anything except say 'chill out' or some crap that makes him irresistible to women. Upon watching the movie I wondered why I recognized this guy and then I remembered the superbad DVD commentary. They mention Clark Duke cause he kept jumping into every scene in the house party ruining continuity. I also remember when I watched it thinking 'who is that fat dorky looking emo in nearly every shot'. Congratulations Clark Duke. You can tell your grandkids you were in a funny movie. Yeah, the one where you never say any lines and try to ruin it! 4. This movie is completely summarized in one quote by Clark Duke near the end of the film when he turns to the camera and says 'These things never happen in real life'.

This sums up this movie entirely. Everything in this movie NEVER happens in real life. It's absurd, ludicrous and downright stupid.

Let me just give you one, and one example alone, of the stupidity of this movie.

The movie is about a virgin who drives across the country to finally have sex with a hot blonde girl who will screw him...BUT...10 minutes into the movie he crawls away from a hot blonde girl who is practically trying to rape him on a bed cause he's friend asks where he is......???? WTF

If you had a choice between anaesthesia-free amputation of your balls and watching a movie that insults your intelligence like Sex Drive does, I definitely recommend becoming the eunich soprano for your local church choir.