missourienne Reviews

Tristan + Isolde (2006)

If you've read any version of this story, do NOT see this movie!

[1/10 · 27 April 2009]

Heck, don't see this movie even if you have (read)--it is one of the worst movies I've wasted money attempting to see. I say attempting because I had to shut it off just over half way through, it was THAT BAD (I am not one to do such things). The acting is abysmal--did they pay these people to do a bad job on purpose? I've seen high school play acting that outdid these poor souls. I suppose maybe I hated it even more because I read a French version of the story (Tristan et Iseult)--the first novel I ever read in French, in fact, and freakin' loved it! My class kept commenting (even the professor) that we were surprised it had not been done as a movie (back at this time)--this version would be a blockbuster hit for sure (just replace the actors, scout new talent). When it came out years later, I was so excited, but the trailers didn't give me confidence enough to merit paying a theater ticket--I should have trusted my instinct and skipped the whole thing. If you ever have the chance to read this version, do it--so worth it, you won't be able to put it down!

Adventureland (2009)

A few laughs, mildly entertaining at best, poorly edited

[4/10 · 26 April 2009]

This movie was just OK--there's really nothing surprising whatsoever, other than how much it smacks of bad editing and/or careless errors. Spoilers from now on: Each character's story is glazed over quickly, then dragged out as it plays through the current time. No emotional attachment possible--and I'm the sort that tends to 'live' the movie when I watch it. Not this time. I expected the movie to center around the job experiences; instead, it is a tired, overdone "virgin falls in love with odd girl" story, and the park just happens to be where he meets her (and others he befriends). A few funny things happen there (at the park), nothing more. The movie seems to promote pot nearly as often as a Cheech & Chong flick--seriously, it adds NOTHING to this movie, very pointless. Worst part: the ending. Are we really supposed to believe he just suddenly finds Em in NYC (amazing powers of divination), then after a convo in the rain, all is great???!! Barf. Next, please.