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dagzine
i write, teach, travel. drift.
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Pearls Before Swine (1999)
So un-bad it is un-good
It's one thing to be somebody. It's quite another to be a parody of somebody. I am reminded of Boyd Rice's early years hanging out with Holocaust deniers in his basement in Denver and playing records at the Lion's Lair and how he only appeared to be an actual loser. Because he is the brain behind NON. As in, he is a self devout NOThing. He also has a knack for hanging out with all the real artists while they do good things that he mocks with his bad products. He, I am sure, is the un-Warhol. (ugh.)
Anyways, starring in this piece of garbage as a piece of garbage probably wasn't a stretch. It is something I am sure he'd agree is self-parody. Nevertheless, the filmmakers seem to think their film makes a statement.
Pearls Before Swine ends up being a parody of an attempt to make a film that makes a statement. I don't know what the film is, really, nor what its statement is supposed to mean. So. Is it an Un-film? No it's a film. Just a poor film.
It's "star" is a parody of a satire of a man Boyd Rice fantasizes he is in real life.
The title is a parody of a title, pointing to far too much than a title to a film can signify.
But this film is not even UNpop, as it is advertised. (Unpop is purposefully bad popart, by the way. Kind of like a dumb Warhol; or Stupid Jeff Koons.) Anyway, unpop, like this film, is pure POP refuse and more proof Americans do not really understand IRONY.
Is it funny that a pseudo-NeoFascist like Boyd Rice stars in crap like this? No, it's not funny. It's "Shocking!" Oh wait, that's how the movie is marketed. Well, Pearls Before Swine is certainly Shocking. Shockingly Crappy.
Eventually, it is nothing more than a shocking bore.
Sex Madness (1934)
Sex Crazy Talk with a Purpose
Another cautionary propaganda film. This one is not good so much as hilariously and purposefully bad.
Films like Sex Madness are early-middle 20th Century examples of Abstinence-Only sex education. In other words, the message really is, "Don't have sex because scary things can happen. Yes, those urges are natural, but only a person with low self-esteem would want to engage in intercourse before marriage. And, anyway, you might catch a deadly disease to boot."
Though these films typically portray the problem for both men and women, the message is really about women and their bodies as baby-delivery devices. I love the assumption abstinence-only supporters make: that when you're married, you won't catch STDs. OKEY DOKEY.
Sex Madness is worth watching especially if you are coming to terms with why the white-American-middle-class vision of the world has always lacked any real intelligence. Its mission has always been white people pro-creating. The film's message need not be smartly portrayed; rather, it should be portrayed repeatedly and simply for mass consumption.
I do get a kick out of the comments left for these films by IMDBers who take these genre films seriously and are shocked after watching them. Of course they are wrong. They are tools of oppression.
Finally, it's worth the purchase of the DVD for the two US Navy hygiene films that come as bonus features on an Alpha Films copy. Cocaine Fiends is my favorite of the bunch.