animal_8_5 Reviews

Stay Tuned (1976–1977)

Your Post-Game Chuckle

[8/10 · 29 April 2007]

What a welcome arrival to CBC's programming this show was. After wasting most of my Saturday nights watching Keon, Ellis, Ullman, Sittler and the rest of the Toronto Maple Leafs blow another hockey game, I was ready for some laughs. If there was enough time between the end of the game and 11:00 news, "Stay Tuned" provided them in spades!

This was NOT a Second City production, but the show depended heavily on Second City performers. I don't recall many from the cast, but Eugene Levy and Jayne Eastwood definitely stand out in my vague memory.

My favorite episodes were when the cast did a spoof of the 1958 cinematic sci-fi stinker, "Queen of Outer Space", starring Paul Birch. The actual film was screened (sound muted), while actors provided improvised dialogue from an off-screen venue, a unique concept at the time. After that, I always watched out for them to do another film this way again and I believe for a time they made their film spoofs a regular segment.

This idea was the probable predecessor to the brilliant and popular Mystery Science Theater 3000 concept that has entertained so many of us these many years later.

The time-slot was the worst possible for any program in Canada, because it aired after Saturday night hockey, which with 1970's trademark bench-clearing brawls and etc., often ran past 10:30 pm. This meant the show itself had anywhere from 15 to 25 minutes of airtime, depending on the length of the preceding game/punch-fest. I guess the only good thing about the time was that the show drew in viewers like me, disillusioned and frustrated hockey fans who went on to become huge fans of SCTV and SNL.

If any old CBC employees kept a video of the "Queen Of Outer Space" spoof, I'd be interested in purchasing a copy. This brilliant satire is one of those golden memories from my childhood.

The Rocket (2005)

Best Hockey Movie Made So Far

[8/10 · 15 April 2007]

I have been a hockey fan for almost 40 years and have collected almost every dramatic film ever made about the sport. But, I'd have to say that "The Rocket" is far and away, the best one ever made. The cinematography is stunning, the acting spellbinding and the story gripping. It tells the story of a simple and tortured man who drives himself to excel at the sport he loves. It leads him to become the reluctant hero of French-Canadian culture, self-perceived as being held back and oppressed by the anglophones.

Roy Dupuis, who portrayed Maurice in no less than two other cinematic projects, perfectly captures the fire and intensity of the man in a most fitting, if not THE crowning tribute, to the legend of Maurice "The Rocket" Richard. Biname goes to great lengths to duplicate the look and feel of the late-30s, on into the mid-50s and certainly captures the collective agony and anger of early-to-mid 20th century French Canada.

Julie LeBreton is beautiful and amazing as Richard's wife, Lucille. Notable also are the cameo appearances made by NHLers Sean Avery (Bob Dill), Vincent Lecavalier (Jean Beliveau); Mike Ricci (Elmer Lach), Ian Laperierre (Boom Boom Geoffrion) and Stephane Quintal (Dollard St. Laurent). What "Slap Shot" proved, "The Rocket" confirms. Pro hockey players are damn good actors!

I realize funding for this movie was brought up in the infamous "Sponsorship Scandal" that dissolved former Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin's Liberal government in 2006, but you can't fault it at any level. It was worth every cent used to make it and it will be hard for Canadian cinema to duplicate this level of quality ever again.

Thierry la Fronde (1963–1966)

Something To Sling About

[6/10 · 1 April 2007]

This was a great adventure series out of France that appeared during the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation "after-school" kid's TV series, "Razzle Dazzle". Thierry was not only an unmatched sling man, but the savvy leader of a band of French rebels during the Hundred Year War.

Jean-Claude Drouot portrayed Thierry of Janville, who begins the series as a young lord betrayed out of his title and property by conniving steward, Florent, played by Jean-Claude Deret. Actress Celine Leger played his love interest, Isabelle. Joined by his friends, Thierry becomes a "Robin Hood" type of character and fights undercover to end the iron rule of the ruthless Brits.

I remember the adventure was top-notch and very watchable. Thierry La Fronde was unique in that it portrayed the English as the bad guys and the French as the heroes. In Canada, we were used to English television portraying the Brits and the Yanks as the heroes. The dialogue was often hard to follow because, being dubbed into English, the lip movements often didn't match the spoken words.

I hope this isn't giving anything away, but the last episode had the most disappointing ending I can ever recall seeing on TV and I hope to one day see the series again to see if things really turned out the way I remembered.

Batman (1966–1968)

Laughs From The Book Of Exodus

[9/10 · 30 July 2006]

Bob Kane created Batman to be a creature of the night, but in the 1950s comics became so macabre (with be-headings, torture and other select anti-social behavior), the comics code authority came into being. It made comic books conform to such ridiculous restrictions, its a wonder the genre ever survived beyond 1960. The writers of the Batman TV show probably HAD to sling "camp" just to stay sane.

William Dozier had passed over such talents as Lyle Waggoner, to hire Adam West (Bruce Wayne/Batman) and Burt Ward (Dick Grayson/Robin) to be the show's stars. The real stars were the Batmobile and the criminals: Catwoman (Julie Newmar, Lee Meriwether and Eartha Kitt), Joker (Cesar Romero), Riddler (Frank Gorshin), Penguin (Burgess Meredith), Egghead (Vincent Price), Mr. Freeze (Otto Preminger) and many, MANY more! Batman and his teen sidekick Robin the Boy Wonder, were depicted as pristine, out-of-touch do-gooders, who seemed to be fighting a losing battle against hip and groovy criminals. I loved the Batmobile and of course, the labeling of every gadget in the Batcave, including the Batpoles (one labeled "BRUCE" and the other "DICK") always killed me. I laughed myself off my chair during the episode where philanthropist Bruce Wayne is awarded "The Golden Calf". You have to read the Book of Exodus to get the gag here. A little mashugginah with your coffee...?

Every boy who watched the show wished they had a Shakespeare head they could flip up to switch open a wall, revealing a secret entrance to a more exciting life! The Dynamic Duo's rationale for solving riddles, or clues always left me snickering to the point of near-death.

Then I'd revive myself by watching tomorrow's thrilling conclusion! What a Bat-hoot!

The Green Hornet (1966–1967)

Introducing The Legend Of Bruce Lee

[7/10 · 30 July 2006]

This was meant to be an action-adventure series about the grand-nephew of Texas Ranger John Reid (better known as The Lone Ranger) and a stacked luxury car named "Black Beauty", but ended up being a vehicle for the great Bruce Lee and his amazing exhibitions of the martial arts.

While it didn't have the hilarious campiness of William Dozier's other series "Batman", it did have some goofiness about it. I recall one show featuring Canadian actor Larry D. Mann as some kind of freaky space dude who landed at Britt Reid's home to negotiate their takeover of humanity through the Daily Sentinel. This episode also showed Reid interrupting his TV station's programming via some broadcast console in his living room (yeah, no home should be without one) to warn viewers to take shelter and stay calm.

The fact they had this false floor in Britt Reid's garage that clamps onto that bitchin' sports car, so that the floor can turn upside down and allow Black Beauty to roar out and save the day was kinda fun. Oddly, the Reid estate seems to be within a block of a seedy area of Central City, as Green Hornet, Kato and the rolling arsenal fly out from behind a billboarded wall, onto a conveniently abandoned street!!

Of course, we can forgive all the wacky inconsistencies of the show, when we see the great Bruce Lee in action. Well worth sitting through all the silliness just to see that. How sad sexy Wende Wagner watched her career nosedive after Green Hornet. I always liked the idea of a fighting reporter like Mike Axford. Britt Reid must have been a one-of-a-kind publisher, because I just couldn't imagine a maverick like Axford working for control-freaks like William Randolph Hearst.

Did I mention that I liked Bruce Lee?

A Face in the Crowd (1957)

Lonesome Rhodes - Andy Taylor's Evil Twin

[9/10 · 30 July 2006]

I saw this film for the first time about 7 years ago and was blown away by the amazing performance by Andy Griffith. Thank goodness he did this before he became a household name. I can now see how typecasting can limit an actor, as I just never gave him any credit after "Andy Of Mayberry" and "Matlock". I had no idea of the immense range this man possessed.

It has been written elsewhere that the show was based on the phenomenon of Arthur Godfrey and that is possible. I think what happened in this Elia Kazan masterpiece was a demonstration of the power of mass media to lead people to believe what you want them to believe and blind them to what you deem convenient for them to be ignorant of. As Hitler put it, "the bigger the lie, the more likely the people will believe".

This show raises a number of issues we need to be aware of today. As a medium, television has great potential. However, it has never been close to what it should have become since 1957. The medium made Lonesome Rhodes an icon in the eyes of the people, but in reality, he was a megalomaniacal monster. One hearkens back to when Hitler used the television in Nazi Germany for mass-hypnotism and public desensitization so he could take the world into his fiendish grip. Are the powers controlling TV manipulating us like puppets, until the day they hold our very lives in their hands?

My Favorite Martian (1963–1966)

1963 - A Space Modesty

[8/10 · 29 July 2006]

This was as rather cute little 1960s morality play about a friendly Martian who crashes his flying saucer on earth and is discovered by Tim O'Hara, a newspaper reporter. Tim takes him in as his "Uncle" Martin and promises he will harbor him until he can repair his craft and go back to Mars.

Uncle Martin gets his way by his extraordinary telepathic and telekinetic powers. He also is a philosopher, scientist and mind control expert. He never does anything wrong intentionally, but always seems to betray himself by his misunderstanding of the ways of our world. Still, he and Tim are a formidable team and each show always had me chuckling.

The recent movie version isn't even worth commenting on. It was thoroughly putrid and was just a way for the studios to relieve you of your hard-earned dough. Watch ANY remakes of 1960s TV shows at your own peril. You read it here first!

Cannonball (1958–1959)

A Fair Truckin' Show

[7/10 · 29 July 2006]

I remember these shows best from when my local CBC-TV affiliate rebroadcast them on Saturday mornings in the early to mid 1970s. Growing up on a farm, I preferred spending rainy Saturday mornings in the summer watching "Cannonball" over throwing around bales of hay. The concept was easily summed up as being the continuing adventures of two long distance truckers.

The product of busy Normandie Productions (Canadian-based creators of "Hawkeye & Last Of The Mohicans" and "Tugboat Annie"), "Cannonball" starred American actors Paul Birch (Mike Malone) and William Campbell (Jerry Austin). The supporting cast was largely made up of Canadian thespians. Besides its Canadian run, the show was also syndicated to Britain, United States and Australia.

The show was hard for me to classify, because of how highly formulaic TV had become by the 1970s."Cannonball" wasn't a crime show, a comedy, a drama, wasn't news, current affairs, or soap opera, but it was watchable. As I recall the truck driven was marked as follows "C & A TRANSPORT - TORONTO - MONTREAL - WINNIPEG - NORTH BAY - NEW YORK". U.S. networks created the following shows that ripped off the concept: "Movin' On" (1974-76), "B.J. And The Bear" (1979-81) and "Lobo" (1979-81).

William Campbell gained notoriety later in life when he was implicated in the "Paul Is Dead" Beatles rumor of the late 1960s. Also Judith Exner, notorious ex-lover of both mob boss Sam Giancana and President John F. Kennedy, was wed to Campbell until 1958.

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

There Must Be A God

[10/10 · 14 July 2006]

My favorite line: "Gentlemen, you can't fight here! This is the War Room!" Peter Sellers at three times his best. George C. Scott, Sterling Hayden, Slim Pickens, Keenan Wynn and James Earl Jones made up this amazing cast.

All I can say is that truth is stranger than fiction. In light of what is coming out about the secret societal connections of the U.S. President, Britain's PM and all world leaders, the writers appear to be dead on, suggesting a residual Nazi influence on the powers-that-be. Instead of having childish custard cream pie fights in the "war room", the elite who plan to rule the world are secretly dressing up like Santa Claus and whooping it up at the Bohemian Grove. Disgraceful.

With the megalomaniacal powers out there making the blunders they continue to make, you wonder how we could all still be here today. There has to be a God!

This Hour Has 22 Minutes (1993– )

Great Cast, Top Notch Humour

[8/10 · 14 July 2006]

I never really "got" the humour in this show for a few years, but lately I have really come to enjoy the wit and political savvy of the performers and writers. I wasn't a big fan of Rick Mercer, except for his "Talking To Americans" specials, which are just spectacular.

Twenty-Two has arguably overtaken Royal Canadian Air Farce as Canada's top comedy show, mostly because of great cast changes at Twenty-Two and recent ill-advised ones at Air Farce. I think both shows tried at one time to be more or less like one another. To me "This Hour" seems more like Saturday Night Live, only funnier. The transition seemed to happen about the time Gary Pearson joined the writing staff. This would be a boffo show if they let Gary join the cast. Just a suggestion!

Like I said earlier, recent cast changes are working for the show. Gavin Crawford has marvelous range, except for his rather disjointed rants. Mark Critch's impersonations of Canadian talk show host Mike Bullard and CBC-TV commentator, Rex Murphy have me rolling on the floor in utter delirium. The loss of Shawn Majumder, creator of that lovable Raj Binder character, might leave a hole that can't be filled. Over the years, I have fallen in love with Cathy Jones. She just gets sexier and sexier.

Train 48 (2003–2005)

The Optimal Result For A Show With This Budget

[7/10 · 14 July 2006]

Talk about getting the most bang for your entertainment buck. LOW budget? Try NO budget! Looked like it was videotaped inside an authentic GO Train and the actors often seemed like they are actual commuters. The first time I saw it, I had to ask if this was a real thing, or if these people were actors. The producers got not only the effect they wished by doing it this way, but saved them a trainload of toonies.

Overall, I was amazed they made the idea work as well as it did and I thought Train 48 was largely successful in its goal of portraying a realistic view of southern Ontario commuters. My favorite shows were the ones with comedian Gary Pearson, but the entire cast did a great job of doing improv, with a skeleton script. And then again, I am still waiting for the DVD release of Global Television's "Night Ride" series from the 1990s.

Mr. Dressup (1967–1996)

Mr. Dressup Never Dressed Anybody Down

[9/10 · 15 June 2006]

Ernie Coombs was an American cartoonist cum television personality who was hired by the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation to appear as a character named Mr. Dressup in a children's program, "Butternut Square". While the show became popular, Mr. Dressup had the most appeal and got his own series within a few years. The opening animation was always interesting - this was animated for many years by crack CBC staffer Gary Pearson, who did a great job of duplicating Coombs drawing style and putting it in motion.

The two puppets Casey and Finnegan were great characters for Mr. Dressup to play off. Casey, the naive little boy with a slight British accent and his silly dog Finnegan, who made us all laugh. Coombs style was simple, tasteful and respectful. It wasn't the zany, condescending, almost lewd style some kid's programs, like "Tree House", "Soupy Sales", "Uncle Floyd" and others embraced. He, Casey and Finnegan would have a challenging craft, or dress up for a fun little skit, but it never got lascivious, or offensive. I have to take my Napoleon hat off to him for that!

CBC always recognized the importance of quality children's programming, with shows like "Chez Helene", "Friendly Giant", the first incarnation of "Mister Rogers" and later on "Sesame Street", "Fred Penner" and so on. Puppeteer Judith Lawrence retired and Coombs died in the mid-1990s, effectively ending production. However, the show remains extremely popular with kids in reruns, as CBC occasionally shows them today.

Run for Your Life (1965–1968)

This Life Will Self-Destruct In 3 Years?

[6/10 · 14 June 2006]

This was a very clever concept. A lawyer, Paul Bryan, has been diagnosed with an incurable disease and has been told he has just two to three years to live. The idea put this lead character in the position of living life to the fullest and the most responsible. There is a message in that for all of us somewhere, isn't there?

While somewhat morbid straight off the top, the concept made for interesting viewing from my perspective. Ben Gazzara played the main character and each week he would resolve other people's problems, but at the end of the show he would still be facing the anguish of a limited time on this earth. One of an unnamed genre of shows like "The Fugitive" and "The Incredible Hulk", "Run for Your Life" was set in locales all over the world, but probably filmed on studio back-lots, renovated to look like the French Riviera, Hawaii and Rio. The idea was that Bryan was seeing the world with what little time and resources he had left. Each episode he would engage in new relationships, involving himself in new circumstances, resulting in high action and adventure.

This wasn't a great show, but was certainly a product of its time. Always reminded us of our own mortality, which all of us need occasional reminders of in life.

Front Page Challenge (1957–1995)

Time's Up Panel!

[7/10 · 13 June 2006]

I believe Front Page Challenge was a temporary replacement show that became popular enough to bump the original program. The concept was as follows: A mystery guest (still visible to those at home) would be hidden from the view of the panel, who would have to find clues by asking the guest a time-limited selection of questions. Whether or not the guest's identity had been found out, the panel would have the opportunity to interview the guest briefly. Usually each half-hour show consisted of two mystery headlines for the panel to solve.

The curmudgeonly Gordon Sinclair would always ask the first question, which was always "How much money do you make?" Once that was out of the way, it was over to YOU, Betty Kennedy, who filled the chair of glamorous actress Toby Robins later in the life of the show. Betty, herself a real hottie in her youth, could be relied upon to ask hard-hitting journalistic questions like if the guest was married, if they had children, or who was their favorite Beatle. Then Pierre Berton would impress everyone with a smarmy fact he uncovered while researching his latest book, but before he could really get into the interview, the theme music began to play and studio lights dimmed, followed by host Fred Davis' goodbye.

Speaking of the flavorless host Davis, he appeared only to be there to direct traffic on the show, not impress anyone with his sharp wit, or willowy stage presence. The non-descript show, which was evidently done before a live audience, seemed somehow to have enough relevance to hold the interest of most who tuned in. The impressive mystery guest list included such luminaries as Pierre Trudeau, Malcolm X and Ed Sullivan. Often the guest panelists were quasi-famous Canadian actors, or journalists.

While Front Page Challenge' production values aimed not to overshadow their famous guests, they probably 'blanded' themselves right out of work. This was a pretty good concept for the late 1950s, but it was really wearing thin by the time it left the airwaves for good in 1995. No matter - by that time it was the longest continually running non-news program in Canadian television history.

Flashback (1962–1968)

Being Nostalgic About Flashing Back

[7/10 · 13 June 2006]

Bill Walker and Paul Soles were smooth performers and made such eminent hosts. Both men were dramatic actors as well! Soles was the voice of the "Amazing Spiderman." I recently saw Bill Walker in an old episode of "Last Of The Mohicans" under the moniker "William Walker." He was much better as host of Flashback! I remember thinking Elwy Yost was just about the wildest name I had ever heard and I never forgot it! Of course, he went on to a long and storied career at TV Ontario.

I have few memories of Maggie Morris and Allan Mannings, but always remembered the balding, bespectacled Yost, who seemed to have some of the most interesting questions for the guests.

The episode I remembered best was one where the panel interviewed George "Spanky" MacFarland (of Spanky and Our Gang fame), who recounted the horrible collapse and tragic end of my favorite "Little Rascal", Carl "Alfalfa" Switzer.

Uncle Bobby (1964– )

One Of Canada's Best Loved Kid's Shows

[7/10 · 13 June 2006]

Uncle Bobby started out as a short, wiry little man with a hawk-nose and British accent, but ended up being a less mobile, pulpy-nosed, long white-haired old man, less of a British accent and with a huge stomach. I believe the show featured cartoons and kid's features, including a regular visit from a safety cop from the Toronto police corps. Off the program, he did like his "wee drams." I read somewhere that Uncle Bobby and CTV sportscaster Pat Marsden used to close some bars in downtown Toronto back in the late 1960s, early 1970s.

Bimbo the clown and the birthday puppets deserve some mention here, also. What was it about hosts of kids shows in this era and their cardigan sweaters? Is there some symbolism here that is escaping me? One thing I remember that at some point, the show stopped taking itself so seriously and laughed at itself quite regularly, as the rest of us were doing. These cheap little shows were so bad, they were truly great!

The Uncle Bobby Show was an institution here in Canada and more should be made of this talented man who came to entertain us in our living rooms every weekday.

The Forest Rangers (1963–1966)

Great Show - The Best Closing Theme

[8/10 · 13 June 2006]

This remains one of my all-time favorite TV shows. I recall it best when it ran as a feature of the CBC kids show, "Razzle Dazzle" with Al Hamel and Trudy Young. This kids show would feature other great kid's shows like "Skippy The Bush Kangaroo" and "Thierry La Fronde" too.

I can remember climbing off the homeward school bus one day and turning on my family's 19" black and white "Admiral" TV to see Rex Hagon (Pete Keeley) and Susan Conway (Kathy) appearing as guests of Razzle-Dazzle co-host Trudy Young. To that point in time, I really didn't know TFR was a drama! I was convinced what was on the show had to be reality! Being a kid you have strange perceptions - I thought people were only allowed to "act" in Hollywood, certainly not in the Canadian wilderness! When I realized that not only Americans could act, Canadians could too, I was so darned impressed!

The chemistry of the characters were what drew me to the show day after day. Pete and Chub (Ralph Endersby) always wanted to be the leader, but somehow, they'd eventually make up and get on with what had to be done. My favorite character was the wise native Joe Two Rivers (Michael Zenon), who always sent a chill up my spine with his familiar recant "Mebeeeee...mebee NAWT..." Of course, who could forget the stoic Sgt. Scott (Gordon Pinsent), a rather diminutive dude who still seemed to be able to scare us crapless even wearing a goofy hat, wide pants and a red serge.

I think everyone who ever heard it, loved the memorable theme music written and conducted by the great John Hubert Bath. The Forest Rangers always ended with that memorable flourish: Duh-duh-duh-dummmmmmm-dummmmmmmm-DAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! which concluded each episode. The same incidental musical pieces featured in TFR, also graced the 1958 movie "Wolf Dog," which I'll always love, but (sadly) you will probably never see.

My kudos to a Canadian gent named Clayton Self and his work on the TFR fansite - see the "miscellaneous" link at left. He also managed to put together a wonderful reunion for the cast and crew of the show. He was also instrumental in getting the series immortalized on an Imavision DVD series in 2007. Long live TFR in reruns.

Headline Hunters (1972– )

Hmm, Its Monday, So This Must Be Headline Hunters

[8/10 · 5 June 2006]

For Canada, this was an entertaining prime-time headline show on the Canadian Television Network (CTV) that competed head to head with longtime CBC mainstay, "Front Page Challenge." The object of the game was for two contestants to try to guess a popular news headline of the day. Your venerable host Jim Perry was a more exciting, high energy host than FPC's laid-back Fred Davis. Combine this with Dave Devall's velvety voice and this became a "mustsee" show for me every week.

The frequent and brilliant CTV ads promoting "Headline Hunters" were what drew viewers like myself to the show. I can still remember verbatim one advert that ran non-stop for two, or three years. It had all the flash and flair that CTV was able to muster on these promos, then ended with Perry exclaiming to a contestant "You're taking a chance...YOU'RE RIGHT! It IS BOBBY ORR! YESSS!"

Jim Perry, one-time straight man for comedian Sid Caesar, was the busiest game show host in the business at this time. Not only was he was hosting CTV shows "Eye Bet", "Card Sharks" and "Sale Of The Century" for a U.S. network, he regularly hosted the Miss Canada and Miss TEEN Canada pageants north of the 49th. I can still remember the network cutting away for a peculiar moment of silence during one such pageant, followed by a shot of the shaken Perry, reeling and trying to replace his perfectly combed hair. This after apparently being whacked by the placard of an angry female protester who claimed (correctly, I should add) the pageant was "sexist."

The incident was blathered all over the Canadian media by the next day, but wasn't actually seen on air. Perry was such a consummate pro, most viewers probably didn't suspect anything out of the ordinary had happened.

Eye Bet (1971– )

It Made Bloopers and Continuity Errors Fun

[8/10 · 5 June 2006]

This show debuted in 1971 and was a popular Canadian Television Network (CTV) game show hosted by prolific host Jim Perry. The smooth toned Dave Devall was the show's announcer between CFTO Channel 9 weather forecasts, for which he also became very well-known. I can remember carefree summers in my teens watching EYE BET religiously every weekday.

The EYE BET set was a veritable cornucopia of movie nostalgia, with huge posters and pictures of Laurel & Hardy, Marilyn Monroe, Fred Astaire, Grace Kelly, etc. As I recall, Perry's podium, or those of the contestants, were made to look like huge bags of popcorn! In some brilliant way, the stage was set for good movie night fun.

Perry would introduce old Hollywood movie clips, which were then shown to the contestants and audience, then the contestants were invited to answer a question about something specific to each clip, testing their skills of observation. Most of the questions were "We see two men struggling with a gun in the opening scene. What was the blond woman doing behind the main action?", or "In the first scene, there is a scene showing a man in front of a big building. How many flags are visible in the background?" The films viewed were often forgettable "B" pictures featuring scenes with tacky bloopers, but often these were the most fun. For example, a woman reading a newspaper in one scene and in the next it would be folded up and resting on a table. Once, a scene showed a man swimming in the water, then climbing onto the side of a boat and in the next scene his clothes were bone dry. It was good, clean movie fun for the whole family that lasted for all too short a time.

Something I've often wondered. It occurs to me that Twentieth Century Fox, MGM, or Warner Brothers, etc. mightn't have received their fair share of royalties for the clips, because oddly I have never seen the idea, a sure-fire winning concept if there ever was one, used since.

Check It Out (1985–1988)

Would You Believe ... A Bad Career Move?

[3/10 · 4 June 2006]

I think the original idea for this sitcom was "M*A*S*H in a grocery store" and under different circumstances it really could've worked, too. They had one of the funniest, most versatile comic actors in the lead role. The setting, a supermarket, was one most North Americans were keenly familiar with. However, they could never really pull this off.

Don Adams was cast as floor manager of a lovely bunch of coconuts...produce department, who envisioned themselves as nuttier than fruitcakes...bakeshop. His assistant Edna (Dinah Christie) was the voice of sanity amid the clamor of doofus-ness...next aisle, Ma'am. The cast was bolstered by veteran Canadian comics Henry Beckman, Barbara Hamilton, as well as the pure, but hot (kid's show "Polka Dot Door" star) Tonya Lee Williams.

The problem with C.I.O. was probably not so much the mediocre writing, but in the production values. It just looked cheap right from the opening credits, until the last groan-worthy excuse for a punchline. Perhaps the Canadian producers hadn't yet heard that cardboard sets were meant for high school musicals, not internationally syndicated sitcoms.

I shouldn't pan the show entirely. Don Adams was a brilliant comic actor who went on to better things, managing to overcome this turkey...meat department. His co-star Dinah Christie was OK in this show, too. Who didn't love Henry Beckman, veteran of Canadian commercials and sitcoms? Tonya Williams got edgier as she grew older, becoming a star of character roles and soaps...aisle 7. Arguably the most successful actor of the supporting troupe. To me, however, she'll always remain that pure young thing behind the Cobb's cash register.

The Trouble with Tracy (1970– )

A Comedy Of Tragic Proportions

[1/10 · 3 June 2006]

For years I remember reading about this show "Trouble With Tracy" in the TV Guide. CFTO-TV Toronto every Saturday morning at 6 am! I lived about a two-hour drive north of Toronto and we couldn't get CFTO, but you know how it is - we always want what we can't have.

Well, I knew what I wanted and what I wanted was to see what this "Trouble With Tracy" was all about. Did it have a beautiful girl in the starring role? Was there nudity? Was there suspense? Was it a comedy? It would've been fine if there was some promotion of the show. At least I could've known what I was missing. But, NO! The mystery drove me bonkers, until CTV affiliate CKCO built a re-transmitter in Wiarton, Ontario and began to broadcast "Trouble With Tracy" at the same time as CFTO....Saturday mornings at 6 am!! One Saturday morning I got up and turned the TV on at 5:59 and at last I got to see what "The Trouble With Tracy" was. Yes, the "Trouble With Tracy" was that it was Canadian content and stuck in the harmless 6 am spot so no one would ever see how awful it was.

Talented Canadian Actor Steve Weston died a few years afterward, but many would argue he effectively "died" the first time he appeared on this show. When I saw it for the first time that cold Saturday morning and fell despondent back into my bed, part of me died, too.

The Amazing World of Kreskin (1972–1975)

Amazed Me, But Not How You'd Think

[6/10 · 3 June 2006]

This was a peculiar program, with droning jazz music as a theme. The show was clearly made on a shoestring budget, hinging solely on the charisma of Kreskin, physically an early incarnation of computer guru Bill Gates. Kreskin must have fancied himself a Norse king or something, because he didn't seem to have a first name - always went by Kreskin. Probably fathered a bunch of wiry blond-haired kids who grew up to be chess prodigies.

One thing that always Amazed me about the Amazing program was that it wouldn't apologize for being a rather unimaginative show with a rather dull host - quite the contrary. Rather, for all that it was (and that wasn't much), it WORKED! I watched the entire half-hour show each week and was entertained enough to chat it up with my friends at school the next day!

Dave Thomas portrayed Kreskin in a brilliant SCTV spoof of the show called "The Amazing Cretin." It really made fun of the part of the show where he always asked an audience participant "Just to confirm for our TV audience, we don't know one another and are not at all acquainted. We've never had a conversation in any way, shape, or form. I've have had nothing to do with you before this program in any way, shape, or form. Nothing has been prearranged to your knowledge and we are not related in any way, shape, or form....etc, etc, etc."

This show was distributed all over North America in the mid-to-late 1970s. I have found out that even KABC in Los Angeles carried the program back in the day.

Kreskin was a great mentalist and his legacy seems to have been making the rest of us somewhat mental.

Circus (1978–1985)

Three Cheap Rings Are Better Than None

[1/10 · 3 June 2006]

This was another of those cheap Glen-Warren shows done for the Canadian Television Network. This, as well as many others of the day, could easily rate as the least original, least entertaining shows in television history.

The concept? A three-ring circus set in the middle of the Agincourt, Ontario studios (which also housed CFTO-TV, CTV's flagship station) featuring some cheesy circus acts. Knowing CTV's budget, said acts were probably handsomely rewarded with something really worthwhile, like tickets to a taping of Headline Hunters, or free bread and water from the studio commissary.

The most memorable host (if there was ever such a thing) was Pierre Lalonde, a French-Canadian in name only. Any accent he possessed was "trained" out of his voice. The presence of Billy Van clearly showed that the poor man needed some serious dough. I think its safe to say he didn't do "Circus" for artistic reasons.

Snow Job (1983–1985)

No-Frills Comedy ... Without The Laughs

[5/10 · 3 June 2006]

It was a time on television with great group comedies such as "M*A*S*H" and "WKRP In Cincinnati" Meanwhile, up in Canada they had something called "Snow Job," a rather forgettable show about a bunch of wacko characters working at a posh Montreal ski club. Its a good thing CTV chose to put a laugh track on the thing, or you wouldn't know where the jokes were supposed to be. Rumors abound, but there is no evidence that the scriptwriters also penned news copy for the stone-faced Harvey Kirck of CTV National News.

Of course, they had to have the "deja-vu" episode, featuring a sexy French hostess being snowed-in at a lift house with the staff Don Quixote. It was Hot Lips/Hawkeye, or Jennifer Marlowe/Herb Tarlick all over again! Just about everything about this show was Deja Vu all over again, just not funny.

I give the show a 5 out of 10 out of respect for the late Rummy Bishop. At least he had the good sense to LOOK funny...

Ernie in Kovacsland (1951– )

Television: A Medium Because Its Neither Rare, or Well Done

[10/10 · 3 June 2006]

In July 1951, the opening words "Ernie In Kovacsland! A short program - It just seems long," introduced a summer replacement show for the popular "Kukla, Fran and Ollie" on Philadelphia's NBC affiliate, WPTZ. This was one of several early television shows that starred the legendary Ernie Kovacs during his most creative years. Kovacs was a true media artist and the TV screen was his chosen canvas. The summary title above is an actual quote attributed to this prodigious entertainer.

In any other age of TV, Ernie Kovacs would probably have gotten fewer ratings than the test pattern, but in the dawn of the medium, he was one of its biggest stars and unquestionably its biggest innovator. He inspired comedy shows like "Rowan and Martin's Laugh-In," as well as talk-show hosts Johnny Carson and David Letterman. He was revered by the creators of MAD Magazine, who took Ernie's zany, way-out style to a long run in the publishing world.

Uncompromising and single-minded, he despised dictum from station management and sponsors. The common routine for "Ernie In Kovacsland" is that the show would start and before it was over, a producer would field WPTZ station manager Myrtle Tower's daily call to tell him "You can't do that!" Kovacs even used the show to start his own secret fraternity called the "Early Eyeball Fraternal and Marching Society, for which he sent out memberships to interested Kovacsland viewers. On the back of said cards listed silly rules and bylaws, including "I have an aunt named Albert."

One program, Ernie announced to viewers that the show's entire budget for props was $15 and jokingly asked them to donate any extra brooms, or furniture. His impromptu pronouncement saw the public respond with an avalanche of donated items, some of which became regulars on the show. One was an six-foot doll he named "Gertrude" who wore a dark blouse with a question mark and a matching white skirt. Another of the donated props was a papier mache dog that resembled RCA Victor's "Nipper."

Once, a homeless man wandered onto the set looking for a warm place to sleep. Ernie allowed him to curl up on the floor and made him a snoozing cast member for that day's sketches, calling him "Sleeping Schwartz." Kovacs' co-star Edie Adams, who would go on to become a star in her own right as well as his second wife, was a wonderful creative source for the show and became Ernie's voice of reason when his on-air antics threatened to get out of control.

On January 13, 1962 Kovacs died during a rare California rainstorm when his Chev Corvair skidded into a power pole after a Los Angeles party. By this time, it became public that the networks were beginning to erase Kovacs historic programs to save money. Much of this man's brilliance has been lost forever, but some video and kinescope does exist. I highly recommend anything you can find, as Kovacs was truly a legend and a man ahead of his time.