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Reviews
Sader Ridge (2013)
Total waste of time
What's there to like about this film:
1. The location
2. The creepy guy
3. Ummm
4. The end credits, which didn't come soon enough
In a nutshell, this movie can be characterised by:
1. Its terrible acting
2. Its terrible characters, who are also uninteresting and annoying (with the exception of the creepy guy who didn't spend enough time on set for me to have a chance to dislike him).
3. It doesn't make sense. No really, it doesn't. Is it or is it not a super natural flick?
4. It's just simply dumb.
5. No, it's super dumb, dumb on steroids, stupendously stupid... etc., etc.
6. Oh, and it's just plain boring.
If you like your horrors to be blah and dumb with characters that are borderline retards with either too much emotional baggage or lack thereof, then this movie is for you.
La posesión de Emma Evans (2010)
Complete. Utter. Rubbish.
According to IMDb, I wasted 98mins of my life for this cinematic, genre-sullying piece of drivel.
Best suited for audiences who enjoy:
1. Horror movies that are both dumb and annoying
2. Watching terrible acting at its finest
3. Scary movies that aren't scary so they can savour the irony.
4. 'Simple' movies post lobotomy operation.
In terms of possession movies, the original Exorcist is still the best - by a long shot. The Exorcism of Emily Rose (7/10), and more recently, The Last Exorcism (also 7/10) are better choices.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows - Part 1 (2010)
Faithful remake of the novel
An accurate portrayal of the book, this movie warrants two parts to cover the ground of detail omitted in the previous films; especially the cat-vomit adaption of Half Blood Prince.
Having said that, I did have some grievances: 1. Annoying hand-held camera work. This sort of narrative doesn't suit it and it's not consistent with others in the series.
2. Stilted dialogue, (Yate's trademark). It seems that the 3 central characters can't have a simple conversation with each other - even when something significant happens and they NEED TO TALK. Harry should be sharing his visions, his wand's weirdo behaviour, etc; instead he's slow dancing with Hermione.
3. The ending. The movie ends when Voldermorte acquires the wand and Harry burries Dobby. I'd rather it end where Ollivander explains the elder wand and the continuing connection between Voldermorte and Harry's wand, highlighting the significance of Voldermorte's pursuit of the Elder. I think this ending departs with an additional layer of meaning, giving the audience something to digest for the next film, and would've been a better way to conclude a segue ending.
For any HP book loyalist, this movie won't disappoint. The only thing left to do now is remake the travesty that's Half Blood Prince.
Sauna (2008)
Original, compelling and truly intense
I've been watching horror since childhood, and it has become a tiring, arduous task trying to find a flick that satisfies my elitist craving. I can't begin to tell you how happy (and genuinely frightened) I was to watch this.
Everything about this movie is original. Set in 16th century Europe, the story's foundations are firmly planted in realism. The horror comes from masterful application of suspense, fear and dread that is gradually introduced in each scene. By the time you reach the climax you're paralytic; gripped by fear – eager to watch to the end but terrified by what may happen next.
Having said that, this movie isn't for everyone. If you're after a bunch of over-sexed, blonde and artificially enhanced teenagers being hunted down by a knife yielding psycho – you're gonna hate this. If you're after fast-paced action, you'll be yawning throughout the film. If you're after a complex horror film marked by developed characterisation, a unique premise and set in an unfamiliar time in history, you will be pleased.
This is a rare, horror film that focuses on atmosphere and restrained script-writing, resulting in a mature, sophisticated experience for the discerning viewer. Grab a glass of red and enjoy!
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)
By far the best book; by far the worst movie
I've been looking forward to this movie since 2005. The novel is characterised by a darker, more mature mood - fitting considering it's the penultimate book in the series; Rowling does a good job setting the scene for the final battle. This was also the very first book I read the series - and got me reading the others.
While I'm not a massive fan of the movie franchise, the earlier films have been roughly true to the books. But the Half Blood Prince isn't even a HP adaption. I don't know what it is - other than crap.
Key scenes are scrapped. Dialogue is lazy and stilted. Characters have changed their personalities, and non-existent scenes are added that don't even add to the story.
Everything about it looks bored and tired. Only Draco remains truthful.
I hate this film. The 1/10 rating is over the top; it deserves negative.
Won't be watching the last two films. No longer see the point.