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23 décembre (2022)
Pale Imitation of Love Actually
23 Décembre is a Christmas comedy that's meant to be light, make you laugh, and make you feel good.
It succeeds... partially
First, the movie has clear... preachy elements that are a little cringe and are sometimes patronizing. That being said, it's not overly moralizing in that department so there is still enjoyment to be found. In some instances, it's unclear if the film is making fun of modern culture or celebrating it, so that could be seen as a positive.
However, the scenario by India Desjardins is really average. It's like a pale imitation of Love Actually. It's a bunch of little stories that take place on December 23rd and that's about it. Everyone is struggling with something and the entire point is to watch them navigate that day. That would be fine, except the stories aren't really that interesting. The dialogues are not that well-written either, despite some nice ideas here are there. Some stories will hold your attention more than others, but none of them really stand out.
The acting also falls flat most of the time. Despite some big name actors, they have little to work with here. I don't know if it's the script's fault or the directing by Miryam Bouchard, but the acting felt stilted, unnatural, and some of the actors seemed to be there just to get a paycheck.
Did I laugh a few times? Sure. It's a bubbly film that tries really hard to be funny. And it can be, a little. But it ends up failing on too many fronts. And you come out of there thinking... that was it? It will certainly not go down as a Christmas classic that everyone will be watching year after year.
Nightbreed (1990)
Bad. Just bad. Skip it.
Semi-imaginative imagery and cool-ish effects can't hide the terrible screenplay, writing and acting this movie has. It also progresses in a very cliché manner despite seemingly being a mix of two different movies that don't work together. I was amazed at how bad this was.
Save your time.
Altered Carbon (2018)
Season 2 ruins it all.
Why can't they keep the same writers on shows? I'm sorry but when you change actors, you can't also change the main character's personality. The writing is extremely weak with so many cheesy one-liners and a bunch of one-dimensional characters. They also "sanitized" the show to ridiculous extremes and re-tailored it to please a 21st century left-wing audience instead of just showing the future world it's supposed to take place in.
Season 1 was great. Season 2 is not.
Dragon Quest: Your Story (2019)
The ending RUINS the film! No spoilers.
Although the game's story is condensed heavily, it is still well done. Everything that's important is here, and of course, the animation is stunning.
Unfortunately, they completely ruin the film by changing the ending in a BAD way. Like, I was so baffled by the ending that I'm like, I'm never seeing this film again.
Extremely disappointed.
Tidelands (2018)
Interesting premise but terrible execution! Terrible acting! Terrible dialogue!
(Season 1)
So the idea that sirens give birth to half-breeds that live according to their own rules is interesting, but that's all this series has going for it!
The acting was awful. Honestly, most of the cast looks like (ex) porn actors. It's like they were asked, "Do you want to be in a REAL show?", and.... Tidelands was born.
Charlotte Best, Marco Pigossi, Mattias Inwood, Jet Tranter, Annabelle Stephenson, Bianca Saul.... they were all bad! It doesn't help that their dialogue was not good, either.
Only Elsa Pataky and Aaron Jakubenko, maybe, were doing OK considering the script.
What added to the cheesiness were the constant pop tunes thrown in there that felt out of place, the very same flashback scene shown like every episode, the numerous ridiculous character reactions, and stuff like Dylan's character I swear in every other scene was seen removing or putting his helmet while on his motorcycle...
It really felt like a 1990s skin flick... except without much skin! You know those films that were not porn but not "real" movies either? They were just an excuse for random nudity? But the plot was thin and the acting was awful?
Yeah, that's Tidelands. Skip it.
The Romanoffs (2018)
Short comments on every stand-alone episode.
First, you have to remember that the episodes and not connected and can be watched in any order. Second, the Romanoffs have nothing to do with the show, usually they're just the main character's ancestors, that's it. Third, these are mostly just 'slice of life' stories and, well, they're not all good.
Episode 1: 8/10 - This starts well enough. Takes place in France where a couple has trouble dealing with the man's aunt, they're waiting for her to die to inherit, but she won't die. I thought the episode was gutsy enough to show us a Muslim woman remove her hijab and sleep with a man out of wedlock, which is not something you often see to be honest. Obviously, though, that actress doesn't usually wear a hijab, or else she would never have done it. Anyway, entertaining.
Episode 2: 7/10 - Not as good as the first one, but still entertaining. A couple with marital problem deals with meeting other people while away from each other and where their loyalties lie. The man and the woman are clearly not on the same page and one wants out more than the other. A more comedic episode.
Episode 3: 9/10 - The best episode of the series. If you have to watch one, watch this one. It's almost horror-like, and coincidentally, has the most to do with the Romanoffs out of all the episodes. An American actress goes to the Netherlands (? - i think it was) to shoot a TV show about the Romanoffs and all sorts of weird stuff start happening, the characters around her also start to get progressively stranger. The end is slightly predictable but otherwise this was a great episode.
Episode 4: 5/10 - Blah! A woman with a secret fights with her daughter and wonders about her life and the weight of her secret. Nothing too interesting.
Episode 5: 2/10 - Moralizing! A true push-down-your-throat moral episode. It started with a "wait are they really going there?" premise which would have made it interesting. But nah, this is just typical PC stuff that's trying to pass a message forcefully. Also, no father in the 70s would ever speak to their kid that way just because they asked somebody if they were a boy or a girl. Ridiculous.
Episode 6: 5/10 - A woman travels the world with her son to try to find a cure for him. A journalist tries to expose a clinic for their shady practices. I didn't like the acting from the journalist in this one, felt wooden. The journalist and the woman meet in Mexico, obviously. I don't know, it was average. Nothing much happens.
Episode 7: 8/10 - A very strong episode about a couple going to Russia to adopt. What does it mean to adopt? Can you pick and choose what you get? How is it different than a biological kid? Very good conversations in this episode, although it really doesn't make you want to go to Russia.
Episode 8: 1/10 - Moralizing! Terrible! Cheer for the bad guy kind of episode, because "innocents deserve what they get for not being a minority". At one point in the episode the guy has a conversation with a transexual and says, "They call us trannies, poofs, queers, but we're stronger than all of them! Look at what we've gone through!" Yadda yadda yadda! Has nothing to do with the episode! Poor, poor, oppressed minority. How tough life must be as perfect people that are rejected by the majority! Ugh. I wish Matthew Weiner didn't shove his politics down our throats with his screenplays. Also, isn't Matthew Weiner a straight white male? Doesn't that automatically make his opinion 100% worthless? I mean, shut up and listen, right?
4 episodes out of 8 were good. Overall: 5/10
Ashita no Jô (2011)
Kind of hard to take seriously.
Ashita no Joe is a famous Japanese manga started in 1968 that chronicles the story of Joe, a down of his luck poor chap that will rise to fame thanks to a former trainer that will teach him boxing. Basically, the Rocky story. Except... in Japanese. And done before Rocky.
So this is a live movie adaptation of the manga and... I cannot really recommend this movie. I guess they were trying to keep it manga-like, but that just made it ridiculous and impossible to take seriously.
As it is the case with many Japanese movies, the acting is overkill. Everything is exaggerated; reactions, facial expressions, drama. The acting was kind of bad. I sometimes found myself chuckling at dramatic scenes that were supposed to move you because it was so overdone. It is also plagued with dumb humor that just isn't funny.
The fight scenes were impressive and disappointing at the same time. The first ring match, for example, I thought was great. The boxing looked real and had a touch of unrealism that was exciting to watch. The problem is that Joe's signature move, the cross-counter, becomes too much of an easy way out and one hit KO. To the point where that might become the only punch he'll throw in an entire match. Rocky = good unrealistic fighting. Ashita no Joe = mixed bag. The final fight is also utterly disappointing.
What is good is the cinematography. Everything looks great. Also, seeing Japan in the 1960s is one of the highlights of the film. The sets are great and it's interesting to go back to a time when Japan was mostly poor.
Overall, I wouldn't recommend this movie unless you're an Ashita no Joe fan, and even then. I gave it a five because it looks beautiful and some of the fights / training sessions were interesting, but that's about it. If you want to see better Japanese movies that are in the same vein (though not boxing), I recommend Crows Zero and its sequel, Crows Zero II. Though they suffer from some of the same flaws, it is to a much lesser extent and they are much better movies in my opinion.
Watch if curious, but you're safe to skip this one.