starrychloe Reviews

Once Upon a Time... in Hollywood (2019)

Slow, boring, pointless, meaningless. More boring than Jackie Brown.

[4/10 · 1 October 2019]

This is a fictional story about a real life event with a twist. It is a homage to Hollywood nostalgia and movie making. However, for people who do not live in Hollywood or work in the industry, it is rather pointless and meaningless. It could have been made so much shorter (it is too long). Many people, for example the neighbors, did not need to be in the movie because they did not interact with the main characters and did not advance the plot. It could not even be considered a character study because the characters were rather shallow and not particularly likable. It was more boring than Jackie Brown. It did have good cinematography though.

Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

Updated Review

[6/10 · 12 October 2018]

I'd like to change my review. However my old one was deleted without my consent. My rating was 7, but I watched it again, and lowered it to 6. There are more plot holes that I found and more character actions that don't appear believable or have any explanation or motivation behind them. I think this is a kids movie.

Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)

Standard sci-fi heist movie

[6/10 · 14 September 2018]

This is a standard sci-fi based heist movie. There are heists after heists, chase scenes, and triple crosses. It was entertaining, but some of the character's motivations were undeveloped and unconvincing, which made them flat. One of the robbers sacrificed herself for a heist, which is completely unbelievable. This Han was plucky, like Luke from the original, not cavalier, like the original Han. I didn't mind, however a whole movie dedicated to one person should at least explain their philosophy or principles.

Avengers: Infinity War (2018)

Arbitrary and capricious + plot holes

[6/10 · 3 August 2018]

There is a giant plot hole in the first 5 minutes. Apparently there was a boarding party and the Hulk character was hiding and sneaking up on the enemy. That is very out of character. Normally the Hulk attacks first, directly, and loudly. That part didn't make any sense. Then the Hulk lost in a simple fist fight, when that character has been through much greater ordeals. Then the Asgard transporter is activated when the machine was already destroyed! Such sudden and severe plot holes really made me p-----... made me angry and I vowed to rate 1 star. That was only the first 5 minutes. How they decide who wins against whom is so arbitrary and capricious, and never follows any sort of logic or consistency. I am willing to suspend disbelief, but the writing must follow its own rules! Characters can be smashed by giant boulders, their skin never tears like its made of diamond, yet they bleed from a fist. Pure nonsense. It never occurs to Dr. Strange to use a portal to get back home, when that is half of what he does. Lazy writing. The rest of the movie was entertaining though, with even more plot holes, so I settled on 6.

Annihilation (I) (2018)

Metaphor for a bad LSD trip

[8/10 · 12 May 2018]

I swear this is a metaphor for a bad LSD trip, or perhaps more accurately, a bad mushroom trip. The shimmery colors, the surreal landscape, the horror images, the chaotic thinking, and most of all, the characters each observe and expect from the shimmer the energy they themselves put out. That is exactly how LSD or psychoactives work. The universe gives what you give. The 'shimmer' is a reflection of themselves. There were several characters, one expected a double cross, one wanted peace and tranquility, one was there to fight, and one expected annihilation. They all got what they were looking for. Some other characters even seemed like they WERE on LSD, or maybe PCP or bath salts! The music was an exceptionally eerie type of glitch ambient - the most alien music I've ever heard. I didn't really like the movie, but it got me thinking for the rest of the week. It's a classically grotesque movie, like Tideland. I would watch it again, while tripping (may god help me).

Mother! (2017)

Very abstract artsy/horror/grotesque

[7/10 · 12 May 2018]

This was a bit too abstract for my liking. I don't mind art films, but I prefer them a little more concrete. For example, I liked Tideland even though it was thoroughly grotesque in a classical sense. This move had interesting cinematography and mood and tone, but it went very abstract towards the end and I couldn't really follow it. I thought it was a metaphor for socialism, or immigrants, but the metaphor didn't hold. It was too chaotic in meaning. I do like some of his other movies like The Fountain and Black Swan however, but not this one.

Black Panther (2018)

Shallow conflict

[7/10 · 12 May 2018]

The conflict was shallow and one dimensional. They both wanted to give away their technology, just in different ways. Marvel could make an entire movie over two librarians fighting over an Oxford comma. I'd like to see real deep-seated disagreement like libertarians fighting socialist. This movie belittles real conflict and makes wars and conflict seem so trivial (most Marvel movies do). They make it seem like people just fight over nothing. Another thing that didn't make sense was the villain waited to challenge the young king, when he could've challenged the old king and had a higher chance of success. Apparently by the movie rules he can challenge whenever he wants. I can see why racists won't like this movie. It's very Africa centric. The bad white guy had more character than the good white guy (there are only 2 white people).

Millennium Actress (2001)

Artistic story of chasing the dream of an ideal man

[7/10 · 2 September 2017]

A young woman is cursed by a spirit to live a millennium chasing a man she's never known and has only seen once. There are 4 archetypes in the story: a tall dark stranger, a young naive wistful girl, an older jealous woman, and a caring brave 'nice guy' in the friend zone. These characters reappear over & over throughout her lives both past & future. The 4th archetype is reminiscent of Forest Gump. In the present, she is an actress retelling her memories to a small documentary crew who are drawn into her past, present, and future lives. The scenes transition between eras of Japanese history artistically but abruptly and without logic or reason. Scenes also transition between eras and present movie sets without real rhyme or reason. This is similar to the style of Mr. Nobody. (Some reviews said it could not be made live action but was done effectively with that movie.) There are some questions in the movie that do not get answers. The story telling is very artistic and unique, more so than Deadpool. I'm quite OK with artistic movies (Princess Kaguya), but the scene jumping was a bit too illogical and without motivation. I tend to prefer a bit more coherent stories. (I also believe I gave Mr. Nobody a 7.)

Deadpool (2016)

It's an OK movie - a little original but not much

[7/10 · 20 May 2016]

It was an OK movie. The dialogue was the best. The plot was a boring, standard revenge plot. The story telling was very unique. The scope of the movie was small - it all took place in one city. The characterization was poor. Many of the characters were flat, their motivation was unexplained, and some were even one-dimensional - just placeholders. The main character was OK though. By the way, Deadpool has an ENTP Myers-Briggs personality type. His friend, TJ Miller, who also plays Erlich Bachman in Silicon Valley, is also an ENTP. Rick Sanchez from Rick & Morty is also an ENTP. I don't mind the R rating, but it had very little adult concepts. Rick & Morty has more adult themes.

Tideland (2005)

This is a classically grotesque film, but I gave it a high rating

[8/10 · 26 February 2015]

The movie is not pleasant at all. It is very disturbing, in more ways then one. However, it absolutely will not leave your memory and you won't be able to forget about it. Some of the cinematography and dream sequences are surreal and very imaginative. This is a grotesque film, but not in a gory way. It is very unlike Terry Gilliam's other movies. It was very unexpected for me. I didn't really like it at first but it really sticks with you. I gave it a high rating because it is art. It makes you feel things you don't usually feel, even if they are unpleasant. This is the type of movie that is guaranteed to fail at the box office, yet the artist pushes on through. Most movies are very forgettable, and they will never be remembered. This one leaves an indelible impression, especially with all of the mental illness portrayed.

Coherence (2013)

The science is retarded, but it's more like a Twilight Zone episode

[8/10 · 10 January 2015]

This was a really good movie. Of course the science was retarded. It's more like a good Twilight Zone episode. I would say it's more of a character study, like, "what would you do in extreme circumstances? What are people capable of?" I kept thinking about this movie over the past 2 weeks, and re-watching certain parts. It would be really nice if they could make the situation scientifically plausible, or map out or make the geography more understandable. I couldn't really understand the relation between the houses, the neighborhood, the cars, and how they can go in & out of every door to get around. The suspense is slow to build. I didn't really get what was fully going on until the middle when it was revealed, even though I understand the concept in real life, and even with the clue in the title. I guess I was engrossed in it and led by the misdirection. Then the goosebumps came.

Ku! Kin-dza-dza (2013)

Very original movie

[9/10 · 27 July 2013]

This is a very original movie and concept. Very fanciful. It took a while to learn what some of the words meant (in the middle there is a cheat-sheet) and to realize the aliens were telepathic. That is part of the charm because you have to read between the lines and pay attention. The alternate social structures are rather intricate. Sociologists would have a good time watching this. All the characters are scheming and double-crossing each other, yet they manage to work together. There is a definite anti-authority tone to it.

I believe this is a remake of a Soviet-era film. I could not find that version. I'm glad this one uses modern animation as I could not imagine how a Soviet film could possibly depict these scenes using Solyaris-type technology.

I've seen the original now. The special effects were not terrible. I still like the newer animated version better. The original had some confusing, superfluous parts that didn't make sense like a detour and time travel. The animated version is practically exactly the same, except the roles of the Russians are modified, the animation allows grander, larger scenes that would not be possible back then, and introduces the robot, which adds complexity to the character interactions. The robot would not have been possible back then either. The robot has its own well defined character as well. The same director directed both movies. I believe he had a lot of time to put some thought into this movie and tweaked it and improved it where it needed it. I will say I was impressed by the sound design of the original movie. For some reason, I pay attention to sound design and notice original, unique, and detailed sounds in movies. The original could have won an award for that.

Hadewijch (2009)

Full of gaping plot holes that render the movie pointless

[1/10 · 12 October 2009]

Saw this movie at the NY Film Festival. It was an OK movie until Celine appeared unharmed after the bomb explosion, which opens a gaping plot hole and begs the question, "why did the terrorists need her in the first place if all they were going to do it plant a bomb?" All throughout the movie, it was hinting that she would be a suicide bomber, yet after they got on the train together, and the bomb exploded, yet she survived, it rendered the entire movie completely pointless! Any terrorist could plant a bomb, and did not need her! I felt so angry like a part of my life has been wasted. This movie could have been so much more, yet the director did not have the guts to take more chances and did not even test his script or film before showing the finished product! This renders him incompetent. How did the police know to question Celine, but they did not arrest her? Why did she go back to the convent? Why were the nuns calling her Hadewijch if that was the Muslim name she took with Nassir? How did she get brainwashed between one scene to the next? The "thrash accordion" music was funny, intentionally or not. What kind of a thrash band has a saxophone and plays off key, let alone accordion? The guy with the guitar was in the back. The movie could have been so much better, the cinematography was great, the acting OK, the plot could have been more solid. The director needs to re-shoot most of the ending. The Christ-like figure in the end who saves her is a nice touch. Jesus was a carpenter; this worker guy is a stone layer. The theme of the movie is "Christ is all around you", and the "invisible", and yet she passes him throughout the movie without noticing him at all. She finally found her true love who saved her from herself. I don't know how the director will include that when she blows herself up, but that's for him to figure out when he fixes his film. He needed to take bigger chances to get a better film out of this.