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Reviews
Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992)
Just Horrible
I have seen most of the Hellraiser movies and this one is definitely the worst.
The thing that nearly made me switch the film off was the new cenobites. What a complete insult to all hellraiser fans. The cenobites are suppose to be both terrifying and sophisticated and not full of cheesy one liners. A Camera man, DJ and bartender cenobite? Come on!!! I'm glad that whoever came up with those cenobites either got fired or got a kick up the ass because Hellraiser 4 (bloodlines) saw the return of some really creative cenobites.
Jesus wept........more like Clive Barker wept.
If you loved the first two movies and want to carry on watching Hellraiser movies......then skip this load of dung and go straight on to Hellraiser: Bloodlines.
The Last Valley (1971)
A hidden treasure
Its rare that I give any movie a 10 out of 10 but this film really deserves it. The acting, the action, the atmosphere, the camera work and the sublime scenery that surrounds the village is enough to make you want to book yourselves a ticket to Bavaria or Austria. The captain (Michael Cain) is a tragic hero. He's a man who has been shaped by the war and turned in to a brutal and ruthless soldier who has the respect of the men that follow him and eventually the locals. The Last Valley is a sophisticated war movie and a real treat for all you intellectuals who love European history. Why this film is so hard to find I will never know but once you discover it you will immediately fall in love.
The fact that I can not find a bad comment on IMDb about this movie should speak volumes to those of you who are still deciding whether to go and rent or buy this film.
Bullet Boy (2004)
Another British film about how miserable life in the UK is.
Over the last 20 years the majority of British films are about how horribly poverty stricken the UK is and how our youth doesn't stand a chance of a good life whilst they live on the mean streets of British cities. The British film industry is obsessed with the idea of 'broken Britain'. Trainspotting, This is England, Kidulthood, Football Factory, Kes and From London to Brighton.
Bullet Boy is just another British movie added to that list. The main character expresses a desire to go straight yet he still insists on hanging around with dead beats who carry guns and fight with gang members over nothing. I was never convinced that he did want to go straight as there was nothing stopping him pursuing an education or a trade. In fact it would have been a breath of fresh air if he had of gone straight and we had a character who turned his life around. Instead he spends his time helping his friend trying to commit murder. I felt no sympathy when he is predictably shot by another teen at the end of the film, which is sad because at the beginning of the film I really liked the entire family and their desire for success. I believe the makers missed a great chance to show the world that success belongs to those who are willing to really strive for it (like the Pursuit of Happiness).
I know the purpose of this film was to try and paint a realistic picture of what life is like for black teens living in working class areas of Britain but don't we already have enough films in the UK with that very same plot? Isn't it time these talented producers and writers give Britains youth something to aspire to and show them a better life is just around the corner?
I applaud the makers of Bullet Boy for not loading the film full of mindless violence in order to try and get success through shock factors (like Kidulthood, Football Factory) but at the same time this movie offers nothing new to a long list of British films that are effectively dull and depressing to watch. There is no happy ending to this movie or any of the others I have mentioned.
Zulu (1964)
A response to the racist accusations
I love this movie. Its British flag waving action at its best. I did read in a newspaper that the film is quite popular amongst American and British soldiers in Iraq. However every once in a while you do meet the politically correct 'something to prove' guy who tries to slander the movie as 'racist'.
There is only one racial slur in the film which comes from the British officer 'Bromhead'. He is immediately shouted down by a white south African boar and a message is sent to the audience to remember those who where not white British but still died in the service of our country. Bromhead is a character that the British audience would never have liked. An upper class snob who looks down his nose at the lower classes and who refuses to get his hands dirty. So his racial slur would have been immediately frowned upon.
By the end of all the bloody fighting both sides take their hats off to the other and salute their bravery. The Zulus sing a native song and through out the film the Welsh soldiers comment on the outstanding bravery the Zulu's showed. The Zulu discipline and military tactics are also admired through out the movie.
The film doesn't portray the British soldiers as invincible he-men and the Zulus as incompetent mad barbarians. It's simply an account of what is still to this day a military miracle (equal to Agincourt) on the side of the British soldiers who where fighting for their lives rather than the British empire.
South Park (1997)
Southpark teaches us to laugh at ourselves.
I read in complete disbelief the comments that called the show racist, homophobic, anti-religious and even one that said it promoted animal cruelty. LOL! There isn't a single race, religion, political group, sexuality, gender, nationality, celebrity etc etc that it doesn't make fun of. The show even pops fun at itself in some episodes, signalling to the world that they themselves are open to ridicule. If you think the show has a nasty message about a certain group then your just not getting it and i'm glad you have ceased watching and have moved on to more brain numbing programmes that don't cause you to think (might I recommend 'Friends').
Animal Factory (2000)
A good movie
Probably the first prison movie I have seen that in no way glorifies prison life. This movie makes it very clear that prison is a dark place and the only people that dwell their are losers not winners (forget the rap music and OZ). There is no good and bad in this prison just those who will make it and those who won't.
The movie follows Edward Furlong; a young drug dealer who is small, skinny and is eyed by every inmate but one (Willem Defoe) as an easy target for rape. I genuinely feared for him and I still shudder to this day over the thought of entering an American prison. However the film does get slow towards the end and it loses its atmosphere once your safe in the knowledge that Edward Furlongs character is well protected by his new friends.
It has to be said though, Mickey Rourke stole the show as a drag queen. One of his best performances. A must see.