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hack-stone
Reviews
Rollergator (1996)
Why?
So many why's with this movie, a lot that have already been addressed. Hack Stone's only experience with this assault against humanity was a viewing about two weeks ago from watching the RiffTrax version, and only made it through about 80% before he had to go to sleep. That being said, Hack would like the following to be answered:
1. Why did they find it necessary to have an acoustic guitar drown out all of the dialogue? Granted, the movie was not going to be the next Casablanca, but it was extremely difficult to follow what little plot there was you could not hear what the actors were saying.
2. Who was the target audience for this movie? Obviously no sane adult would watch this, with the exception of those who would want to make fun of it, and I find it hard to believe that it could hold an eight years old attention beyond two minutes, with or without the dialog being drowned out by the guitar.
3. Who is responsible for unleashing this on innocent people, and did they think that this was the movie that America was yearning for? And where exactly was this movie ever screened? Did it get screened actual theater, or was it released straight to video?
4. Most importantly, why didn't the Sheen-Estevez Family stage an intervention to stop Uncle Joe from appearing in this travesty? They probably offered the role to Frank Stallone, but he turned it down because he wasn't that hard up for a job.
Hack Stone has had a colonoscopy and watched this movie, and to be honest, it is difficult to determine which was more painful.