phulla Reviews

Out of Darkness (2022)

90 minutes in 10

[4/10 · 2 March 2024]

The content of this story like many others only contains 10 minutes of actual interest, the rest of the time is just dragged on with time consuming and time wasting cut scenes.

Cut scenes should only total 10 minutes of the movie, gap fillers.but this and many others tell a story by dragging it out for 80 minutes.

The whole movie concluded in the last 10 mins with the whole other 80 mins attempting to lead us towards the end with nothing to watch. There was lots of walking, camping, walking, story telling, hunger, pain, walking, camping, some monster, camping, walking, fighting, the end.

I hate movies that introduce any form of interest or climax after 60 minutes of uselessness, this is another one of those movies.

Megamind vs. The Doom Syndicate (2024)

Awful

[1/10 · 2 March 2024]

Don't even bother wasting your time or money with this movie. Not sure who's giving this a rating of 10, and even a rating over 1 is too much.

This is one of the worst movies ever. Everything about this movie is awful, atrocious, pointless, and doesn't make sense and doesn't follow from the first movie, especially as a prequel sequel.

This movie suggests megamind had friends in the first movie but that doesn't make any sense considering the timeline as megamind was very short

The animation appears to have been created on MS Windows. The jokes are from the 90's and there isn't any comedy, suspense, or even anything original about the story, and as mentioned doesn't make any sense. There couldn't be a reason for a sequel and somehow one exists.

Actors do need to value their reputation, and that's exactly what the original cast must have done if they were requested to join the cast,

The Lone Ranger (2013)

Jack Sparrow?

[7/10 · 18 February 2024]

An unusual method of telling a story, but nothing new. This was a fun movie although it was a serious fiction, you could believe it is true reflection of the behaviours of those in the 1800's. It was a solid portrayal of why The Lone Ranger is the lone ranger, why Tonto is his partner and why they were the good guys.

As a fan of the TV series I forgot about the theme tune until it began to echo through my surround sound at the end of the movie, and it was then I realised the theme was never used at any other point in the movie.

As usual Depp portrayed Tonto well very but you'll never not see Jack Sparrow. Armie Hammer plays The Lone Ranger very well and great acting from the other big names too. Helena Bonham Carter is an amazing actress too.

Lisa Mania (2021)

What happened

[1/10 · 18 February 2024]

Wasn't funny.

No depth.

No story.

No chatacter.

Strong evidence of no budget rather than low budget.

There are so many ways to start a movie and the main thing is the hook, what can you introduce in the first 5 minutes that will grab the audience and throw them into the story as if their own life depends on finding out the outcome. I expect a movie to throw a hook or three and then establish characters and plot within the first 15-20 minutes, or at least an idea of the story or background, depending on the style and theme of the movie but this was pure boredom, a meaningless boring conversation between two characters and no other scene for the whole movie, more or less.

Wasn't funny at all, I didn't laugh, I didn't even circle my mouth with a hint of even a smile.

No depth, bland, boring characters, nothing special and nothing to even remember.

No story at all, even though it centers around one man and his wife, and their business, I wasn't interested.

Not sure who's been watching this but the current 8.8 rating is not a reflection of this movie, those ratings are most likely the actors production staff family and friends. IMDb should seriously consider 0 ratings because there are some movies that don't even deserve a 1 just for the sake of being able to write a review.

Movies should grab an audience by the neck in a headlock and drag them along for a ride, make the audience believe they're in the movie, alongside the characters or even relating to one of the characters, if I want to be on the outside looking in, I'd go stand outside a shop window.

Players (2024)

Waiting for the trigger

[6/10 · 17 February 2024]

Starts off fun, some interesting moments and reminds me a little of Will Smith's Hitch, and a few other of these types of movies where the main characters love interest grows from deceptive and other means.

Dips during the middle, starts getting too serious for a comedy, for too long, and there are hints of the "other" one who's had a life long obsession with the main character.

One good thing it shows just like all other movies of this type, people are not as they first appear, "love is blind" as they say, if there is one thing you take from this movie it's, don't be someone you're not, let people accept you for who you are, they way you are.

It's obvious there will be a trigger moment where the truth comes out and then the next half of the movie is spent in contemplation. Too predictable.

The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes (2023)

Useless

[2/10 · 14 February 2024]

Another useless attempt to squeeze revenue from a franchise

Although the cinematography was good, as were some of the characterisation, but i found this story boring and typical, nothing grasped my interest, I was distracted very easily by messages on my phone and urge to grab snacks from the kitchen and not concerned with missing a couple of minutes.

I enjoyed the first movie, an interesting story and concept, not brilliant, but typical action and love story but sequels typically deliver the usual lack of interest, and it takes something special to deliver a prequel, and this didn't have anything.

The Pod Generation (2023)

I've never been so unsure

[5/10 · 11 February 2024]

I've never been so unsure of a story.

This is an interesting story and fascinating concept, and even though it seems AI can achieve anything, I'm fairly sure technology and even people are nowhere ready for growing babies in a plastic container.

This story wouldn't have made sense if the couple involved weren't from two different ends of the technology spectrum. The mother is an executive at an AI company and the father is a botanist. It was almost predictable that the mother and father would transition and eventually change their view based on their work background, the mother tending towards a natural environment and birth and the father accommodating and adapting to the baby in the container and an app to help look after it. The father obviously accepting the mother's decision to runaway to have the baby in a natural environment.

I liked the story and idea, I think it failed as a story and it's delivery.

White Chicks (2004)

There was no need

[3/10 · 23 August 2023]

There was no rhyme or reason for the two agents to be made up as white chicks because the two rich bratts had small scars after the minor ding in the car journey. The tiny cut on their lip and nose could have easily been covered up by the team of makeup artists with less effort than turning two black men into white women.

Apart from that, there are some funny scenes and a couple of classic tunes. As usual Terry Crewes manages to deliver some funny and cringy dialogue.

The face off scene with "your mother" rips is probably the funniest part of the movie.

And not much more else to say, trying to run down the character count.

Countdown (III) (2019)

Final Destination with an App

[5/10 · 19 May 2023]

Comedic horror where time appears to slow down, for example Quinn and Jordans app showed a minute and some seconds until their death but they still appeared to have a fight with the doctor and wrestle with their demon for 5 minutes. Nothing new about this film and nothing particularly different or unique, oh apart from the app, I downloaded it, it's called countdown til death. Have fun.

Nice back story to why there's a demon with an app, but didn't make sense about how it could be defeated and of course the end has to be left wide open for a sequel. Fairly predictable with Matt's brother luring him out the protective circle and the demon appearing as the girls mom at the end.

Well made and decent acting, I especially liked the Father John who appeared to enjoy the fact he was needed to expell a demon, something he's waited for since joining the priesthood.

Barbarian (2022)

Boring and slow

[3/10 · 11 May 2023]

This was so boring and slow.

This was all kinds of boring, very, very, very, very slow moving, nothing scary happened but some violence at around 42mins, a hilarious moment where we witness the longest tape measure ever, some lazy dumb cops, a hilarious moment where a man is beaten with his own arm, and then nothing.

The end of the movie arrived so fast but still was not soon enough. Difficult story to understand, seemed almost random and I have to keep writing more about this movie to meet the character limit for reviews which is absurd and unnecessary but only 29 characters left to go, 321 done.

Sunshine (2007)

Almost, but pathetic

[4/10 · 14 April 2023]

Every sci-fi movie set in space, onboard a spaceship, on a mission to some destination, will always require someone to perform a spacewalk to fix something that has been damaged which can only be repaired from outside the ship, that is a given and it's so predictable, I expect it as soon as I pick a sci-fi movie.

It's then almost predictable there will be a requirement for someone to perform a manual task that would have been automatic or computer controlled and that will require someone to stay behind or sacrifice themselves for the greater good because that has also been damaged or couldn't be repaired or has failed.

I also expect to see someone sabotage or make a mistake or have second thoughts or is infected/attacked by some alien organism.

This movie had all these situations two or three times over. If I was on the ship I would question the company that built and engineered the ship, and planned the trip.

Then we have man soaking up the sun who had some epiphany that God spoke to him and they shouldn't be trying to save mankind. Most of us here on Earth 150 million km away couldn't spend more than 10 minutes in the mid-day summer sun without the need for a drink and some shade, but we have this character only several thousand km away soaking up the sun sitting in an oven like room. Also at the final scene we have the characters in a box containing the payload at the surface of the sun, intact, in 5000°C. I get the fact that the sun is dying and it may not be this hot, but it still seems too inplausible.

We have our characters jumping from ship to ship without a pressurised suit in outer space where temperatures would be 99% absolute zero is hilarious.

I have no idea what material to which we have access that could shield a man from the sun at those incredibly close distances, but maybe they got help from Wakanda.

This starts off well for about 30 minutes, and interesting with the introduction of the failed first mission ship apparently orbiting the sun for the past seven years, and they just happen to arrive at the same point in orbit of the first ship, only a few thousand km away, which in the movie is quoted as being tens of thousand km away but on the scale of the sun, it would more likely appear to be hundred of thousands km away.

Shame it failed, as a story with so many holes, not sure if this was meant to be a serious sci-fi movie. Seems like half way through the movie the script was handed to a five year old, or the plot was decided by rolling a dice. If this movie was 30 minutes it would have been almost believable, but in the end it became so laughable with so many improbable situations and.scenarios.

65 (2023)

Terrible

[3/10 · 8 April 2023]

Terrible waste of time.

Adam Driver is a great actor and I enjoy most of his movies, namely White Noise, This is Where I Leave You, Blackkklansman, House of Gucci, The Force Awakens, The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker

You make a movie about Earth 65 million years ago, you expect to see dinosaurs. We get to see (and hear) a few tiny creatures during the later half of the movie and then just as predicted we get to see more at the very end of the movie in a typical scenario of the last moment of chance to escape with your life versus Mills making a sacrifice save the girl.

The impact site of the meteorite is expected to have been Yucatán Peninsula in Mexico, and all of the places the spaceship could have crash landed on the whole of the planet it just so happened to crash in the exact same place. The odds of that happening is less than the probability of the creation of life on Earth and the existence of the universe.

You cannot continue to rely on a movie having great VFX and expect it to entertain, we've been used to seeing great improvements in technology over the last decade and expectations are higher for a great story even if it means spending a lot more time and money creating the effects to demonstrate a more realistic story.

Big Lies in a Small Town (2022 TV Movie)

Unbelievably bad

[1/10 · 27 March 2023]

This Story Is Unbelievably Bad

The doctor and his wife believing they can replace their dead daughter by kidnapping another girl and convince or brain wash her to believe they are her parents.

Every character in the town is hostile

The translation of this story to film is terrible

The opening scene is terrible

The kidnap scene was terrible

The car scene was pathetic and terrible, the car was trying to undercut when there was plenty of space to overtake, and then there was a cut scene and the car chase was revived. Acting was horrendously terrible. How did this movie make any money.

The accident was filmed as though the cars belonged to the crew, what was supposed to a serious accident to have the mother hospitalised only caused a minor dent in the hood and fender and a minor dent in the rear of the other car.

I don't believe those who have given this a 10 are viewers, they must have worked on this movie or related or actual actors and crew because I've seen terrible movies better than this and I didn't review them more than 2/10 or 3/10.

This is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I fast forward most of it and managed to watch the whole film in about 45 mins.

A Rainy Day in New York (2019)

Woody's ghost

[6/10 · 26 March 2023]

If you're a fan of Woody Allen you'll most likely enjoy this movie, the story, and it's style, because it's typical Woody Allen or you'll hate it because it's another Woody Allen movie in the style of Woody Allen. Actually as I watched this, all I could see and hear is Woody Allen. I enjoy many Woody Allen movies, I think most of my favourite are all set in New York and if I think more about this, I enjoy those where Woody plays a neurotic. I think this is Woody playing himself through younger actors and trying to relive his own youth. It is typical Woody Allen where the young girl manages to hook up with the older guy, or several (almost).

It's a typical Woody Allen story, intellectual, dissecting, characterful, reminiscing, faults, disruption, arty, dialogue driven, idiosyncratic, partially situation unrealistic, dare I say romantic, and set in New York. Typically, it's well presented, beautifully filmed, strong actors and acting, and amazing New York scenery.

When Ted realises his wife Connie is having an affair with his best friend, the confrontation is again typically Woody Allen, calm and analytical. The only difference in this movie compared to every Woody Allen movie, the "Woody" Gatsby character seems to have more luck and fortune, perhaps because Woody can feel sorry for himself, but couldn't force that on Gatsby. It's no surprise Timothee was born in Manhattan. I was surprised to see Selena Gomez in this too.

This is a journey where a couple from university who travel to Manhattan for a weekend together, end up spending the weekend apart, and spending it with other people, and truly typical Woody Allen style, both characters have massive realisations about each other and their relationship and not surprisingly "Woody" Gatsby has his own past catch up with him.

The ending was predictable, because very large breadcrumbs were scattered along the way.

M3GAN (2022)

Another AI robot gone bonkers

[6/10 · 26 January 2023]

The "AI robot gone bonkers" idea and story isn't new, there have been plenty of these types of movies, but there aren't many "AI robot gone bonkers horror movies", there was Upgrade, HAL from 2001 Space Odyssey, and Terminator.

This was predictable right from the first scene with the parents driving in the snow with Cady. The moment the dog being a nuisance was introduced and the agressive boy at the woods. Lydia the therapist was massively annoying sheet, and didn't even need to be in the movie.

One of the first things anyone working with AI and robotics will always implement is the fundamental Isaac Asimov's 3 laws of robotics.

1. A robot may not injure a human or, through inaction, allow a human to come to harm.

2. A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.

3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

There wasn't any apparent power source for the toy and no evidence of the toy ever recharging.

Also for the toy to respond to "wake up" it would have to be constantly "listening", therefore it could never have been off/sleep.

If any work laptop or laptop connected to the work network didn't have restrictions to prevent data being copied to an external device, all the data Kurt copied would have been logged and flagged to IT immediately.

I think almost all M3GAN scenes could become iconic, the way she walked, the way she crossed her legs moving sideways in the woods, the dance and flick in the corridor at the launch party.

The movie did have some pace, it didn't really slow or have too many quiet moments, so does keep you on edge especially if you're not too great at predicting stories. Maybe watch it if you have nothing else to do, it's more drama horror than horror, and doesn't really detail the tech aspect.

The Man from Toronto (2022)

Wash Rinse and Repeat

[5/10 · 21 August 2022]

Central Intelligence, Ride Along and now Toronto. How many times do you need to use the exact same idiot character to be the idiot side kick in a dumb ass movie? These movies are getting less and less funny, can't wait for the next one!

How many times do you let the bad guy get away when he should and could have been shot dead? Oh yeah enough times to make sure he turns up at the end of the movie.

If you have an axe you could easily throw and kill someone, then why would you hold said axe and keep chasing? You're hired to kill someone, why would you get into a physical fight with the target, when you could just sniper his head off his shoulders?

I know this is meant to be a comedy and nobody's really gonna shoot the stars of the movie, but that's what makes this comedy a tragedy.

Nothing else to say.

Paper Man (2009)

I felt the sixth sense about this movie

[6/10 · 14 August 2022]

I can only ever associate Daniels with Carey and Dumb and Dumber.

Emma Stone is beautiful in her acting as she is in her appearance, and I always remember her from Easy A.

Lisa is so versatile in her performance, whatever character she plays, she never manages to convince you she isn't Phoebe, that might be my problem.

Was casting Ryan Reynolds in this such a great idea considering the focus was on Daniels and Emma's characters, possible not. I'm not sure but I'm thinking could Reynolds have played Richard Dunn and some unknown played Captain Excellent.

Essentially, having a partner, friends, hanging around with people or even having an intimate relationship doesn't stop you from feeling alone. If these characters have created a conscience that allows them to justify their behaviour, of feeling alone, inadequate, surviving guilt, then can two people make a whole?

The movie starts by laying the foundations for why Richard and his wife Claire are moving into a house where she has to spend the weekdays away and Richard needs to write his next novel.

I think Richard allowing the local teenagers to use his house for a party is a little extreme, but the rest of the movie really focuses on Abby and Richards relationship. Movie does move along fairly briskly, no real slow boring moments.

I think you have to either like these actors or be really bored and alone to watch this movie all the way to the end.

I didn't really enjoy the ending, it was too much Happy Ever After, I was hoping for something different.

Prey (I) (2022)

Failed to deliver

[5/10 · 9 August 2022]

We are all aware of The Predator, but for whatever reason we had to wait over 30 minutes to witness the inevitable. There's no need for the softly softly approach to expose the audience to the destruction and horror of this alien, especially considering there was nothing new in this movie that others haven't already covered.

The Predator is a hunting machine yet it seemed to let the hero character get away several times. It would have also been nice to see the hero use more tactics and strategy with her brawn defeating The Predator, considering the strength and power of The Predator.

Not sure if this could have been set further back in time instead of 18th century. I did enjoy watching the movie, I just felt there could have been more to this.

Her (2013)

Almost great

[6/10 · 7 August 2022]

Joaquin is a fantastic actor, I have enjoyed the characters he has portrayed, in Irrational Man, Gladiator and my favourite, Joker.

Amy Adams always shows depth in her acting. Olivia Wilde perfect in this role. The only actress that could have been chosen for her voice played Samantha exceptionally well.

This was less about the AI and more about the acceptance of a human being having a relationship with his OS on his computer. About how Theodore was unable to notice Amy having feelings for him, which was so obvious in the first scene when they meet. Theodore actually rejecting an actual human relationship after his AI selected the perfect woman, beautiful, intelligent and funny... But Theodore has already more feelings for his AI in such a short span of time, he rejected his date.

The AI demonstrated reading several thousand names from a list in approx 200ms and selecting Samantha as her name. That's really the length to which this movie demonstrated the power of AI, yes there were other moments like organising Theodore's emails and selecting letters to send to a publisher, but AI appeared to really take massive leaps in her learning but Theodore's life was almost at standstill, not sure if that was intentional by the writer.

I'm not sure if this was meant to be about a lonely man unable to have a relationship with his wife which broke down last year and he cannot come to terms with the divorce or about having a relationship with an inanimate object that has convinced him she really has feelings for him.

Cinematography and locations were great, very minimalist and neutral, no over emphasis of a modern world, as many typically show, which I thought was a perfect way not to distract from the characters, but I was expecting some more depth from the AI aspect.

If you like the actors and, the pain and the joy the romance then you could enjoy this movie, but if you're expecting a more sci-fi experience then it ain't happening.

Destination Wedding (2018)

Only because it's relatable

[8/10 · 21 May 2022]

Frank reminds me of me, and character delivery is exceptional. I enjoyed the cinematography and style. It's an exceptionally intelligent and deep story and it was delivered well. I guess you have to be in the mood to watch such a movie. If you search for it you might find some humour or comedy but don't except it to jump out at you.

The Batman (2022)

Not convinced

[5/10 · 24 April 2022]

Mr Pattinson may be a good actor but whoever decided to cast him as The Batman cannot have seen many "superhero" movies especially Batman.

Right from the start with the appearance of The Batman in his first scene it was so unconvincing, and throughout the whole 3 hours there was never a moment I felt this was a suitable actor to play The Batman. Colin Farrell who plays The Penguin would have more convincing as The Batman.

Any number of females could have pulled off Catwoman's role, so fairly neutral about Zoe.

Paul Dano executed his performance as The Riddler brilliantly, even with Roberts interaction with Paul at the end of the movie was so laughable I'm not sure how they managed to keep a straight face.

As for the rest of the movie, it felt as though nothing really happened, it may be dark but the pace was slower than a snail, dipping in and out of boredom.

As I write this review, the IMDB rating is a whopping 8.2 and I am not sure if I watched the same movie as those who felt it is worth more than 5/10. Mediocre delivery. Fairly boring. Some obviously noticeable green screen VFX, and cannot understand how it was 3 hours having walked away not being able to remember much about the movie.

Project 'Gemini' (2022)

Terrible

[1/10 · 26 February 2022]

The Acting is terrible.

The Story is terrible.

The Scientific accuracy and even the plausibility is terrible.

The SFX are terrible.

Another Alien movie but without any sense or substance.

Not much more to say.

Scream (I) (2022)

Terrible rubbish

[2/10 · 18 February 2022]

The killers don't waste any time stabbing people to death, but then decide to play jackanory story time at the end, pathetic.

The number of opportunities the killers had to kill their victims at the end was stupid.

In a small town where a killer is attacking people and killed the sheriff and her son, you'd expect the town to increase police presence and call in reinforcements, but instead we get an old retired cop, a mom and a reporter.

Disappointingly terrible rubbish.

Imagine Me & You (2005)

Nothing

[3/10 · 5 February 2022]

There was nothing in this movie, no substance, no story, it barely scraped the surface of any character or their depth in this story.

The story moved at an incredibly slow pace I saw paint dry and that was a lot more entertaining. I couldn't help thinking about Rachel Weisz in Disobedience and how this was delivered particularly well, with much more depth of character and even though the story did move slowly.

The Book of Boba Fett (2021–2022)

Great story, delivery a bit distracting.

[9/10 · 3 February 2022]

The artwork, cinematography and soundtrack are great. The story is told in fragments, which is a little distracting... Ok it's a lot distracting. I love the soundtrack, which really does create the atmosphere. The artwork really does have depth and delivers the sense of quality that reflects the environment.

If you enjoyed The Mandalorian, you'll enjoy this too, as there are scenes with The Mandalorian, Luke Skywalker, Grogu, and other characters.

Jon Favreau has done an excellent job with these series.