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Reviews
The Pirates! In an Adventure with Scientists! (2012)
Awesome fun
I had read the book this was based on, which was very funny, and being a fan of Aardman, was surprised to hear about this movie, which I guess didn't get a lot of promotion.
Its a hidden gem, and well worth a look, particularly if you have kids. Being Aardman stop motion animation, the sets and animation is great, and it has the Aardman sense of humour, not to mention some great acting from Hugh Grant, Imelda Staunton, David Tennant and Brian Blessed. Storyline was great, and the action sequences towards the end were fun. Overall, a hoot, and I think deserves a rating higher than this on IMDb. Definitely one of Aardman's better works.
Assassin's Creed (2016)
Could have been so much better
I was really hoping this would be good... but it wasn't.
First up, I hadn't played the games, didn't know the backstory. This I think was a problem, the movie *does* seem to expect you know the backstory - it gives a ridiculously short introduction to the world, where very quickly you have to understand the Templar knights are fighting some assassins for some secret thing called "an apple".
Production standards were top notch, acting is pretty good (with a good effort by Irons, Coutillard and Fassbender) and some amazing imagery, but the big fail here was the storyline and perhaps too fast pacing. Clichéd bad guy from Irons and the overall simplification of what is complex material makes this just a silly action movie for the gamers when it could have been so much more.
Above Us the Waves (1955)
Great war drama, worth a look.
This movie depicts "Operation Source" the Royal Navy's secret operation to destroy the Tirpitz. This is probably the best movie depicting midget submarines and chariots. Sir John Mills in fine form, and made in the mid 1950s, depicts gear, uniforms and setting not too far from the era. Plot line, it actually follows the basic facts of the real operation, and an earlier operation involving chariots. Some tense moments in the mini subs, and it says a lot for a film where a lot of drama can occur just in one set. Germans are all speaking German and don't come across as 2 dimensional which is always good - though no subtitles (they didn't get used in film before the 1960s). Only problem I would say is the film doesn't make it clear what the results of the mission were, but a minor point.
The Spy in Black (1939)
Good war thriller
Interesting in that it has a German lead, played by a German actor, who you actually sympathise with. Very much not a jingoistic war film, and not what you would expect. Veidt stands out in this as a an actor, his experience really shines through and he comes across as a more realistic, where some of the British actor comes across as 2D. Nice character study of a professional officer who sticks by his code, despite the circumstances. Atmospheric and well made, solid British war spy flick.
Ghost in the Shell (2017)
Amazing visual, and overall above average SF.
Seeing some negative reviews here I was going in thinking the worst, but was actually pleasantly surprised.
First of all, I have seen the original Anime movies, though It's been a while.
The production values, sets, costumes, CGI was amazing. The visuals really are superb, and it's worth seeing for those alone. The move looks a lot like in updated blade runner, but enough of that dark futuristic corporate look that is in the GITS series. WETA are probably one of the few companies that can pull this off, including all manner of physical effects, and CGI. Takeshi Kitano and Pilou Asbæk do an excellent job, and Asbaek portrays Batou exactly as I would imagine him. Kitano is more like his action movie roles, but... this is a good thing. Johanson portrays the Major perhaps with more humanity than the anime, but that's her interpretation. For the movie, it works well.
The movie stays generally faithful to the anime, and some of the scenes are almost exactly replicated. The storyline is different. Overall the storyline is perhaps the weakest point, but still has some surprises.
One comment, Rila Fukushima is advertised as being int he movie, but nowhere to be seen... oddly.
Overall destined to be a pivotal SF movies, worth seeing at the cinema, or at least on Blue ray.
The Patriot (2000)
Jingoistic and historically inaccurate
ON the one hand, I think it's brave to examine an era such as this, and look at the issues at hand, from the settlers point of view.
But on the other hand, so much of a formula is used here, for Jingoism and patriotism, presumably to make sure the movie sold tickets.
After seeing the film, and the scene, with the British burning the church, I was shocked to see that the British would do such a thing. I went to read my Revolutionary war history...and guess what, they didn't. May be in the 1950s this was OK, but in the modern era, fabricating events from wars that simply didn't happen is not OK, and distorts how people see history. This is not a responsible attitude to re-telling history. Overall, great production values wasted on a jingoistic simple tale made for the mass market. Don't bother.
Man Up (2015)
cute indie comedy
Man Up is a cute Romantic Comedy. I guess, you either like Rom Coms or you don't. You either like British Rom Coms or you don't. Unless its the sort of genre you don't like - you will like this quirky comedy.
Simon Legg is always fun, but the best lies go to the sardonic and cynical main character, Nancy. The story takes place over an extended date.... and there is a bit of would searching of both characters. But amongst it, some great comedy material and very witty dialogue.
The movie is very reminiscent of Peg's comedies, (like Paul, or the boat that rocked), and his Cornett trilogy. However, it is good to see him in a romantic story, his writing and acting fits it well.
Like I said, if you like Brit Rom Coms. And almost worth seeing just for "The Reflex" scene.
Starship Troopers (1997)
Awesome mix of Sci Fi action and intelligent commentary.
The interesting thing about this movie is that it does a number fo things well, all in the same movie, something that is very rare.
Its Military science fiction, so replicates training and the military world for the cadets as they train. It's a sceicne fiction action movie, and does that brilliantly. At the same time, it's intelligent commentary on Nationalism and propaganda in times of war.
Just watching this recently, and despite being 20 years old, it still hols up well. This is because the storyline, acting and production values are there.
Paul Verhoeven's remakes (Robocop, Total Recall) recently have failed, because they were made as straight action movies. His spin on Science Fiction has amen him responsible for some of the great science fiction cinema classics, and this is one of his best.
Fetih 1453 (2012)
Turkish Propaganda piece.... ergh..
The movies is built on a premise that a great siege is taking place, but what's not mentioned is that basically, most of the people have long left Constantinople, or died from the plague, and there are only 7000 soldiers left.
That is up against a huge army of 100,000 Ottomans, the huge Ottoman fleet, and even European siege technicians who had taken the Sultans gold to work for him.
If anything, the heroes of the movie should be the Greek Byzantines and the people who came to help them, who held out for 2 months against an army more than 10 times their own size, for two months.
Some nice battle scenes, and it is well shot, but the drama element is unfortunately just propaganda presumably made for the Turkish public and I don't think does a lot for Turkish relations with other countries.
Hopefully one day someone will make a decent movie about the fall of Constantinople - an historic event worthy of it. But this ain't it.
The Last House on the Left (1972)
Groans...
Jesus, this may have been Horror in the 1970's... but we were laughing most of the way through it.
Completely two dimensional characters, pathetic actors that were never seen again, and the storyline was full of plot holes and completely implausible.
For some reason, while all sorts of mayhem is going on, the police characters are written as comedic? It was also meant to be a horror movie, where in effect, its actually a crime/thriller.
Production value wise, it looks like it was made using a $120 voucher from Kennards Hire.
Not recommended.
Death Wish 3 (1985)
Yep - so bad it is good
I saw at the movies with my friends when it came out...and I remember us thinking how ridiculous it is. It appears to have been written by a 12 year old, using some sort of formula, perhaps a 16 year old gave them.
From the most ridiculous gangsters ever, to Charles Bronson inexplicably ordering rocket launchers through the mail, to the infamous gangster armed only with a plunger (??)...the movie appear to have been made with the assumption that there are enough people lobotomised, or otherwise impaired that would see this steaming pile of crap that it would make its money back, even though it is rubbish.
Management (2008)
Cute little Independent film
This is a quirky little film, and really sort of interesting. It's not a standard big bucks Hollywood comedy, it really comes across as a quirky indie film, or a bit more like a French comedy.
While not amazingly funny, it has charm and cuteness. It's a bit of a character study of Stave Zahn's character, and I think at the same time, in Aniston's character, examines people who are married to their jobs and put their own lives second place to work. It also sort of touches on the concept of being in a rut, and people who let their lives slip away without doing what they actually want.
Overall, a cute little film, and I would say worth watching, though don't expect a Hollywood Blockbuster comedy. Far better than its current rating of 5.9 on IMDb.
On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)
I put this in the top two James Bond Films
I just watched "You only live Twice"....and it reminded me how good On Her Majesties secret service is.
The plot lines had become really formulaic at this stage, and OHMSS really changed that. It showed a *real* James Bond, who actually shows fear and love. The settings are awesome. Lazenby is fresh, and cool...and gives a reality to the part where sometimes Sean Connery comes across as 2D (Connery's acting in the later movies a but sub par as he is clearly over the role).
OHMSS *definitely* has the best Bond woman, Diana Rigg's Contessa Teresa di Vicenzo - and the relationship between the two is the most endearing and memorable of any of the Bond films. Diana Rigg is arguably the strongest actor to play the role...and gave it more depth than any other. Many say this has the best soundtrack, with involvement of Loius Armstrong, Hal David and the Amazing John Barry.
The settings, the snow action scenes, the amazing soundtrack, the two main stars all make this a brilliant James Bond. The only let down is perhaps Telly Savalas as Blofeld, who is OK, but perhaps not as memorable as Goldfinger or Donald Pleaseance's Blofeld.
Arguably, the second best James Bond film, after Goldginger.
Thunderbirds (2004)
Eeeeep
I think one of the big problems with this movie was that it appeared to be directed at children, while still aimed at having some content of interest to Adults.
In the end, it was liked by neither. That said, some kids do like it, and my daughter has watched it repeatedly.
The traditional storyline is warped and twisted to put the three main heroes of the movie as kids. This really does not exactly make it a faithful homage to the Thunderbirds.... bit more a rather lame kids adventure story.
The standout characters are Lady Penelope and Parker. Richard Curtis wrote their lines, and they are faithful renditions of the originals. Clearly.... he should have written the whole movie.
Not a great movie, and probably wiped out the somewhat talented Jonathan Frakes career as a director (more the fault of the script than his direction).
Fury (2014)
Gritty but unrealistic hocum and very silly final scene.
OK, lets face it. We are over movies where one American kills 20 Germans who seemingly can't hit the wall of a Barn. They were big in the 1950's, and 1970s, but not any longer.
Fury is a gritty film, with great productions values, really period vehicles, settings and costume. The acting is good, but it is let down by tow things.
Clichéd characters. There is the tough commander, the new kid, the slightly crazy guy. There are a lot of clichéd characters here.
Unrealistic battle scenes. Seriously I just switched off in the last scene. 20 or 30 SS guys with Panzerfasut would have destroyed an immobilied Sherman tank in 5 or 6 minutes. BUT 200 CRACK SS soldiers can't destroy a tank with its tracks off, sitting in the middle of a road????? The tank only has machine guns facing forward, so most of its sides are unprotected. Germans are carrying bazookas, but instead choose to shoot the tank with machine guns, which would not do anything? Seriously, one of the silliest, most unrealistic scenes in any war movie. Really spoilt what could have been a good movie.
My Little Pony: The Princess Promenade (2006)
Amazing
I am a cinema fanatic and make a point of watching at least one movie a week at the cinema. I got to four or five different foreign language festivals a year. I look for cinema that challenges, that is different, than changes the paradigm I use to look at the world.
But now I will see no more movies. After seeing this, I know no movie can be greater. All I can say is..see it, you will not be disappointed. If I went blind now, it wouldn't matter.
The design, characterisations, depth, the themes, the parallels with history and the French revolution. The Homeric like adventures of the characters. Stunning.
If ever cinema could provoke thought into what is truly "the human condition"...it is this work, so subtly and mysteriously called "My Little Pony: The Princess Promenade"
Star Trek Continues (2013)
Pretty impressive
I have seen a fair bit of fan made shows.. but this is really good enough to stand on its own two feet and be a valid production in its own right. Fan made stuff will often get things 90% right, or 95% right. So even if they have most stuff right, they may still have crap actors, overweight fans playing roles...and often matt backdrops where sets aren't available.
However, this really has it all covered, its pretty much professional quality, at least to the same level as the 60's show that it continues. The only bone I have to pick with it is the actors are good, but not Patrick Stewart good....but then again, neither were plenty of the actors on the other star trek shows (and plenty of TV generally).
Seriously, I would pay for DVDs of this if they were available.