skinnyjune84 Reviews

Hello I Must Be Going (2012)

Great Movie, Funny & Cute

[9/10 · 27 December 2012]

For me the choice was simple; either pretend to work while in the office or watch a movie while at work. I was expecting this film to be a 5 at best but I was surprised at how funny & real it felt. After watching this movie I can no longer trust the IMDb ratings b/c if they only gave this gem a 5 & had the audacity to give "killer Joe" & "killing them softly a 6.9, both horrible films deserving of a 0, no longer can I put up with such insanity. I always find it funny that anytime an older person dates a younger person the older person ends up behaving younger than the person they're dating, why is that? Is that the girl from 2 & a half men?

Killer Joe (2011)

How is it possible that this crap was made ???

[1/10 · 26 December 2012]

I've never hated a film so much that its caused me to examine how sh***y sh*t can actually be. Nothing about this film is redeemable. Killer Joe is the theatrical equivalent of a toilet clogging turd. The plot is an insult to skid marks everywhere and the snail like pace at which it unfolds is simply agony, the acting or should I say attempt at acting is so horrid it could quite possibly cause diarrhea & the dialogue can only be described as compacted dingle berries. The burning of 10,000 candles couldn't save the lingering odor this sh*t stain leaves behind. The DVD should come wrapped in toilet paper & instruction to wash ones hand, I'm surprised flies didn't swarm my computer screen while watching this sh***y mess. Compared to this film constipation is a desirable experience. Every SAG member involved in the making of this film should have their membership revoked for unleashing this filth. Also that sex scene with McConaughey is for lack of a better word gross only a pedophile could watch that scene & not vomit. Seriously I was betrayed by the 6.7 rating of this film please take my word & stay clear.

The Human Contract (2008)

I Have Bigger Skeletons in my Purse than this Guy had in his Closet

[5/10 · 26 December 2012]

First let me say Paz as Michael was fantastic, great casting. She looks like Penelope Cruz but much hotter. As for the film, its the perfect example of a good bad movie. Parts of it are good, like the main characters, acting, dialogue and if the rumors are true the sex scenes mimics Will & Jada's alleged open marriage. Now for the bad part, the plot is 4-play without the sex & even at its climax at best its blah. Also the big secret thats finally revealed is such a let down, you see it coming the minute its introduced its like someone telling you the guy with the bloody gloves & knife is the killer. With all that said its a watchable film.