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Lady Ballers (2023)
3/10
The Left can't meme. The Right can't film.
12 December 2023
Daily Wire does some great podcasts and documentaries, but fictional movies are evidently not their forte. Feature length motion pictures are not memes. They cannot be written in a weekend like a razor or chocolate ad for the sole purpose of "owning the libs". This was a poorly executed movie all around and Ben Shapiro lacks any semblance of self-awareness when he called this "the funniest comedy of the last 10 years."

The premise is rich for humor: men pretending to be women and unironically competing with and dominating them in sport. What Boreing and his team fail to understand is that the setup to a joke is only halfway there: you actually have to deliver a punchline based on the funny setup. And this film just doesn't have it.

At nearly two hours, the film doesn't have anything humorous or poignant to say beyond the obvious "men and women shouldn't compete in athletics" premise. The film itself has a production value no better than a YouTube channel or SNL sketch, and that's what it feels like this should have been instead. There's simply not enough ammunition here for a feature film. The tone is so unserious and the script so amateur, I'm amazed this is an actual movie. The trailer appears to be a parody of a conservative film, not an real movie that people put effort into.

Meanwhile every Daily Wire host and friend of the show makes an appearance, and every single one of them is distracting, adds nothing, and ruins the immersion of the film, of which there's almost none to begin with. What was the point of having Clay Travis, Jordan Peterson, Ted Cruz, or Spencer Klavan in this movie if they're only going to have one line and not even attempt to be a character?

The Daily Wire does some of the best conservative work out there in terms of political analysis, but their multiple attempts at films have been disasters to say the least. You can file this one in the ash heap of other disastrous conservative films like American Carol or Death of a Nation.

EDIT: This film supposedly had a $7 million budget? Where did all of that money go, especially since a number of the actors probably worked for free?
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Bumblebee (I) (2018)
7/10
Actually pretty dang good
11 February 2019
It's essentially the same story as The Iron Giant or E.T., but I was amazed by how good this was for a damn Transformers sequel. All they had to do was keep Michael Bay out of the creative process, have a more contained story with a family-friendly tone, and action scenes that aren't visually exhausting and can be enjoyed by people without ADHD. It's one of the most fun movies of the year and you can even leave your Ritalin at home!
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