stevebob99 Reviews

The Invisible Ray (1935)

Delightful movie, great acting performance, laughable science

[8/10 · 2 November 2005]

The Invisible Ray is an excellent display of both the acting talents of Boris Karloff and Bela Lugosi. Karloff pulls off a flawless performance as a sullen and conflicted scientist who appears to put his scientific achievements ahead of his relationships with others, even his wife. His already loner personality becomes unbearable as he becomes paranoid.

Lugosi plays the consummate professional, who is passionate about his work but still finds time to maintain on good terms with everyone, but still seems to have no real close friends. This was one of his few roles as a good guy and he plays it very well. It is hard, however to hear his accent and believe he is French.

The biggest problem with the movie was that it was all based on "junk science" but, in a way, even the junk science makes it work well. Since the ideas and theories are completely idiotic, they are as "relevant" today as they were when the movie was made. And they are also as forward reaching- and always will be.

This is a perfectly delightful movie to watch again and again. I saw it maybe 5 times this weekend and I could easily sit through it five more times. The acting is marvelous and the science is amusing. I highly recommend it.

I Bury the Living (1958)

Gives you an unexpected treat!

[9/10 · 10 June 2005]

I originally wasn't going to post a comment on this one, but after reading the others, I felt I needed to say one thing- the ending DID work, in fact it was the best part of the movie. The reason? Everyone expected a certain kind of ending, including me and we were all set up for something completely different.

This one gave us something we did not expect, and for that reason, I think it is a wonderful, refreshing, classic. I bought the movie expecting a campy cult film, and I was very pleasantly surprised.

The level of acting was stellar, with the exception of the Scottish grounds keeper that sounded like he was overdoing the accent and looked like he was really a young man in heavy make-up.

As Richard Boone descended into madness, you could feel him starting to slip. If you watch the movie late enough at night, you'll feel like you're going with him because the film starts to get distorted and subtly changes.

The best part of this rare treasure is that you can get it cheaply combined with other "classic" horror movies of the 60s and 70s. The copy I bought had the hilarious "Bucket of Blood" and the compelling "Horror Hotel" on the same disk.

Outstanding!

Attack of the Giant Leeches (1959)

Fun and educational too!

[2/10 · 12 May 2005]

Attack of the Giant Leeches is a very fun movie if you like watching B-horror movies to laugh at how poorly they are made and scripted. A few things I learned from this movie:

1) Alligators aren't scared of men or animals but they may be afraid of minerals

2) Game wardens take their wives out on dates while they look for poachers

3) Atomic testing can cause giant mutations of just about anything (OK, OK, I already knew that. Most of these movies are about that.)

4) Women like being called "baby"

5) If you're in a boat for 2 days looking for something in the water, then you hear it sloshing around, it's OK to just go home without checking it out.

6) It's OK to have a picnic in a boat while looking for dangerous monsters.

7)Sleezy people always die in the end (I already knew that)

8) Good guys don't need a good reason to take their shirts off (Ok, I knew that, too)

The monster costume was so bad I couldn't make out the shape of the leech at all- it looked like what it was- a man in a cheesy suit.

I gave the movie a 2 because it really was bad, but don't let that stop you from watching it. It was 64 fun minutes of foolish pleasure from the king of B-horror, Roger Corman

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964)

A Christmas cult classic

[2/10 · 25 April 2005]

This movie is pure camp. The costumes are silly, the make-up is ridiculous (the martians are not green around their eyes), the dialog is stiff and the acting is horrid. There is no plot, either. Somehow, you put all that together and it becomes a good, clean, fun movie. We'll be watching it every Christmas season and laughing all the way through. The Martians are especially fun to watch. They have what looks like a vacuum hose on their heads for no apparent reason. They also have coat hanger antenna that the earth children think makes them look like televisions. The two earthling children are really obnoxious. They can always get away from the Martians, but they always seem to get caught. There were at least 2 elements of the script that were never resolved. Why didn't the martians retrieve their robot from earth if they didn't want to be discovered? and Whatever happened to the Rockets Earth sent up after the Martians? Even the title doesn't make a lot of sense but you don't need to understand the movie, you can enjoy it for what it is- silly fun. If you liked Plan 9 from Outer Space, this movie is definitely for you, too.

I Eat Your Skin (1971)

Good, campy fun!

[10/10 · 18 April 2005]

This movie is as rich in camp as you can get. From the playboy writer who likes reciting his stories to bikini clad vixens with their short balding accountant jealous husbands to the zombies who may come from the native voodoo practice or may come from another source.

Turn this movie on with a few friends and laugh the whole way through. This is much more fun than most movies that try to be funny. The characters are so bad that they are fun and the script makes almost no sense whatsoever. So, just forget that there is supposed to be a plot in every movie and that horror movies are supposed to be scary and enjoy this one.

10 out of 10 for good, campy fun!

The Doodlebops (2004–2007)

Kidiot TV that is still horrendous

[15 April 2005]

I found the Doodlebops boring and painful to watch. There were no lessons taught and the songs were completely mindless. The characters seem more interested in drawing attention to their clown outfits than they are in teaching about numbers, colors, the alphabet, manners, or anything else for that matter. They sing at least twice in every episode a mindless song that proclaims that they are, indeed, "the doodlebops." They show a live performance in each show, too. In it, you can watch the kids jumping around while the parents look bored to tears. Hopefully they didn't have to pay to get in! There is no comparison between this mindless drivel and the substantive lessons offered by their more famous inspiration, the Wiggles. This it truly "kidiot" TV.

It's been a awhile since I wrote my first comments, so I thought I'd give the doodlebops another chance. I watched about 3 episodes all the way through and it still is as bad as I remember. I honestly see zero value in this show. It even has some patently bad values- for example, Moe is constantly tempted to pull a cord that dumps water on his head. Despite being constantly warned not to pull it, he always lands up doing it. This seems to teach kids to give into their desires despite common sense and authorities over them.

Another example, DeeDee seems extremely self-centered with not repurcusions to her egocentric behavior. She usually lands up leading Rooney and Moe down the same path.

The Ref (1994)

A quirky Christmas Story

[8/10 · 28 December 2004]

I enjoyed the Ref immensely. It is an off-beat change of pace from most Christmas feel-good movies, yet it still comes together in the end. Denis Leary is very convincing as the successful cat burglar caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. Christine Baransky plays a delightfully deranged sister in law who is more interested in money and appearances than in family or Christmas. Kevin Spacey proves that he can play any part from milk toast nagged husband to serial killer.

One caution, though- if you are offended by cursing, then this movie is not for you. There is a great deal of cursing in it. If you've seen any of Denis Leary's stand-up, then you know what to expect, but if you want a Christmas movie to watch with the kids, go find A Christmas Story, Eloise at Christmastime or It's a Wonderful Life. Anything but this one!

Full-Court Miracle (2003 TV Movie)

Two hours well spent!

[9/10 · 8 December 2004]

This is a great story of following a dream when it seems impossible and of having faith and waiting for an answer from God.

It dealt with the story of Hanukkah in a very reverent and responsible way. Since I did not know the story very well, the movie actually inspired me to look it and read about it in the context of history.

The acting was believable, although it had the feel of a movie. The team started off too bad and finished up a little too well to be believed, but movies are supposed to be a little larger than life.

I'd like now to read the true story of Lamont Carr, the coach portrayed in the movie. I was surprised to see that it was based on a true story. I'd like to know how true it actually is.

I think it was two hours well spent. Nice job, Disney!

Scared to Death (1946)

Fun Movie

[3/10 · 21 July 2004]

Scared to death is a fun movie. I really liked the character of Bill Raymond (played by Nat Pendleton), who was a detective sitting around a house waiting for someone to be murdered so that he could impress his superiors on the police force.

There were a great deal of fun turns in the movie. The bad guy was really a good guy and the person who was "murdered" really deserved it. As I mentioned before, the cop was there for no reason but to wait for a murder and the reporter was also there waiting for something to report. There was also a dwarf who seemed to just be hanging around to make the movie strange, a man who wanted a divorce and couldn't figure out how to get one, a doctor who never saw a single patient and a maid who sometimes seemed like she might be a nurse.

The plot was so silly and contrived that you couldn't take it seriously- so you have to just sit back and have some fun with it. It's not an expensive movie, I bought it on a DVD that also has 2 other Bela Lugosi movies on it- White Zombie and The Corpse Vanishes. It's not the best plot in the world, but it is a nice distraction for an hour of your time.

White Zombie (1932)

Classic Zombie movie

[7/10 · 21 July 2004]

You have to change your way of looking at movies to really enjoy old horror movies like this one. Don't be in a rush to see action, violence and don't expect to see any bloodshed at all. Most of the grisly part is implied and you have to fill in the details. Instead, watch it for the scenery, the acting and the plot.

I prefer the older horror films to the newer, slash-fest movies because they allow me to think and they generally have a good, moral theme. You never have a good guy as a demon or a fiend, for instance.

White Zombie has the older, traditional zombie characters that are not evil in themselves. Instead, they are mindless and controlled by a shaman, who is generally evil and must be destroyed to set the zombies, who are victims, free. In the newer Zombie movies like Night of the Living Dead, the Zombies are either not controlled or are evil themselves and must be destroyed.

I think the acting by the zombies is very good and so is their make-up (i.e. they have very frightening faces.) Their master, played by Bela Lugosi, is also played masterfully. The missionary is also good, but most of the rest of the cast is only average.

It's a fun movie to watch and I gave it a score of 7 out of 10. If you love early horror movies, buy it. Don't pay more than $10 unless it's packaged with other movies because the picture and the sound quality are weak. If not, you might catch it on a Friday night horror fest on TV. It's worth the time watching it if for Bela Lugosi alone.

Dracula (1931)

Watch the movie, but read the book, too.

[10/10 · 14 July 2004]

Bela Lugosi's Dracula is the standard by which all other Dracula stories are measured, but it has basically 3 fundamental flaws:

1) Plot lines are not developed very well

2) It deviates from vampire legend and from the Bram Stoker novel

3) It lacks the religious undertone of perverted resurrection

Some spoilers follow-

1) Plot lines not developed- for instance- Lucy Westenra dies after one vampire bite instead of having a slow torturous death that involves heroic efforts from 3 suitors and recruiting of Van Helsing. There doesn't really seem to be a good reason to write Van Helsing in the first place.

2) Plot deviations- for instance- Dr Seward should be Lucy and Nina's contemporary, but he is portrayed as Nina's father. Renfield is unrelated to the rest in the story and is separately recruited by Dracula, but in movie he acts as the real estate agent (Jonathan Harker's role)...

3) Religious undertones- Dracula is a story about an anti-Christ who is resurrected to undeath rather than to life. The parallels to Christ are numerous- he lives after death, he is both corporal and spirit, he must be invited to enter a house while Christ bids us to invite Him into our heart, etc and the contrasts are also important- he hates light where Christ is the light of the World, he gropes about in darkness, he seeks to destroy, he pollutes blood.

Bela Lugosi's acting is superb, almost too good. The book's Dracula is repulsive while Lugosi is suave. The book's Dracula speaks English perfectly, while Lugosi has permanently cursed the character with a Romanian accent.

The movie is tremendous, but the book tells a different story. Watch the movie, but read the book, too. Both are great in their own rite.