jamiehill_uk Reviews

Troy (2004)

Absolutely pathetic

[1/10 · 28 December 2005]

Only the Americans could change one of the most famous myths on this planet. The gods are completely ignored, how on Earth can you ignore them, they are the reason it takes place. The contest, in which Paris is the judge, between the Godesses to see who is the most beautiful is the cause of Helen leaving Menelaus after she is used as a bribe. They then take a ten year war and make it as if the war only lasted a few weeks, absolutely pathetic. What made the war so spectacular is the fact that it lasted ten years. Then the ending is changed as Helen escapes going back to Menelaus, when in fact she does go back to Menelaus, all the women of troy go to various warriors. The casting is pretty poor but then again this movie is aimed at idiots and they will like seeing no talent big names in a movie. Those who watch this and enjoy it are morons, they really are.

Buddy's Song (1991)

A truly underrated movie

[8/10 · 27 March 2005]

I have always liked this movie, i feel it is a great debut performance by Chesney Hawkes, who plays Buddy perfectly. The movie captures every young persons dreams of becoming a rock star perfectly, Nigel Hinton in my view did a great job of converting his movie to the screen. The cast throughout is solid especially Rodger Daltry who was amazing in this. He really was believable as a 50's throwback who liked his dodgy dealings on the side. The soundtrack to this is brilliant, the one and only is a pop classic and it also includes some other great songs such as Nothing serious; you have to love the video for it in the car wreckers.

Creep (I) (2004)

Watchable horror film

[5/10 · 14 February 2005]

The movie is a decent horror movie but ruins itself by not explaining the character Craig. You see the picture with him as a child and the doctor, so you know he comes from the abandoned hospital but that is it. The movie does not explain why he is disfigured in such a manor, what the purpose of the tests on foetuses were, why he was pictured with the doctor or why Craig seems so strong. There also seems no motive on behalf of Craig. Script: 5/10- dialogue was reasonable. Directing: 8/10- pulls off the darkness and scary scenes just right. Acting: 5/10- I don't see any Oscar nominations appearing soon. Storyline: 2/10- Poorly explained. Overall: 5/10

The Stepford Wives (2004)

Quite good

[4 September 2004]

I found this movie quite amusing with quirky little one liners. I like the story too, it and has some sociological aspects about the decline of marriage and the depth of love, and is probably more relevant today than in 1975. There is 2 versions of the 2004 version, the cinema version is not as good, the original version has a better less happy ending in which they all stay as robots and is about 15 minutes longer due to there being more emphasis on them being robots rather than lobotomized with micro chips although this is important still. Either way this is a fun little movie in which everyone could enjoy. It is haloed with a strong cast including Matthew Broderick who is fantastic, Christopher Walken is as always his intimidating self and Niicole Kidman who plays the psycho career women well.

Directing: 72% Acting: 85% Story: 74% Overall: 78%

The Blair Witch Project (1999)

Worst movie ever

[1/10 · 4 September 2004]

To start off with the acting is awful, i don't care if it is low budget it

is awful. They don't sound scared or confused at all. There is no point to

the movie, they just wander about the forest for an hour odd. the ending, well what on earth was that? You end up not knowing what has happened, who or what got them or if it was a joke. Whta mianly bothers me is people said it was the scariest movie ever, well what part was supposed to be scary. I was bored throughout, and i didn't see a part in which i thought people would be scared. Avoid this movie at all cost, if someone gives you the DVD as a present then slap them around the face with the box and tell them you never want to see them again.

Garfield: The Movie (2004)

Quite a good kids movie.

[7/10 · 24 July 2004]

I don't see why people blast this movie so much. It is funny, well acted and well animated. Breckin Meyer plays the nerdy Jon very well and acts like the pet loving dork that we loved so much in the cartoon. Garfield looks amazing, almost identical to what he looked like in the cartoon. Bill Murray is perfect to play him and his voice is similar to Lorenzo Music. They included all the trates of Garfield- lasagne, TV and being a lazy fat cat. Thye kept Odie the moronic but lovable dog. They kept the fact that Garfield has an agreement with the mice and gets on with them. They kept Liz the vet, which brings so much more to Jon. This is a great kids movie, that i am sure adults who watched this as a kid will love too.

Fahrenheit 9/11 (2004)

This aint no Panorama, this is more Nickelodeon.

[1/10 · 9 July 2004]

Yes this hyped up joke of a movie is the worst documentary ever. A good documentary has 2 sides of an argument this has one and never even comes close to delving into the other side. The movie just aims to attack Bush, often in an unfair manor i feel, and i don't even like Bush yet i feel he was treated unfairly. The movie is based on assumptions and little fact, he talks about Bush's links to the Bin Laden family, links that are very slight and has no proof that his assumptions are correct. My main problem with this movie is that it sets out to entertain rather than inform like a good documentary should. I pity any American who lets this movie sway their vote in the forthcoming elections, but any person with any sense would not vote democrat just because of this movie. People with sense will see right through this movie and the only ones who wont are very anti-bush so would have voted democrat anyway, or they are just morons who should have their vote taken away.

Rab C. Nesbitt (1988–2014)

One of the all time greats

[3 July 2004]

This is an amazingly clever show set in Govan (a major working class area of Glasgow). It gives a humorous idea of working class life and philosophy (watch out for Rab's little rants). It also gives a clear view of modern day family life for an alcoholic. This shows comedy that the Americans could never quite master, silly but clever comedy. And only the best britcoms last for 8 series'.

Some people may not understand the characters but due to me having Glaswegian parents i am use to the accents. This is to be released on DVD soon, i advise to go get it but make sure you watch with the subtitles on.