ant8900 Reviews

Sniper: Ultimate Kill (2017)

Accurate

[5/10 · 28 January 2024]

In what is by far the 7th...movie of the series, the characters are sniperier than usual. The aim of this movie isn't to win an Oscar, in that sense, it's spot on. No, the aim is to accurately depict sniper v sniper in Colombia. Even though I count no less than four different times where each sniper would know where the other is without cover, they, with honor, chose to only engage in preset situations in which they both know they'd be there and therefore set a trap. Look, I can't militarily strategize for you, but needless to say, this one does not miss. I give it a ten out six stars. Pewn pewn is a go.

Christmas on Repeat (2022)

That poor groundhog

[6/10 · 27 December 2023]

Take Groundhog Day, subtract Bill Murray and most of the charm and comedy of the movie but sprinkle in Christmas and boom, it still doesn't quite describe what this is. I've been a fan of the leading actress since her days as a South Central Louisiana State University Mud Dog. It's a Christmas movie so it's not supposed to be Oscar worthy but parts of this were just low effort high cringe. For the life of me I'll never understand certain aspects of this movie (I'll just say basketball) but they really do tie it in a neat little bow by the end. Still can't stop thinking about how much she liked bad boys in college though...

Something from Tiffany's (2022)

PBN

[7/10 · 25 December 2023]

Unlike when H*llmark asks you to follow along as they paint by numbers, Amazon actually uses color in their palette. The mix of characters and diversity bought about a sincere sense of reality. It still does manage to give you that romantic Christmas feeling. The main characters are attractive and seem very sincere. This movie manages to make me want to revisit New York while simultaneously making me glad I don't live there. All in all it was a decent Christmas movie that doesn't attribute all the good things that happen to the magic of Christmas. Not that there's anything wrong with that. All o have to say about the end is...Hallmark would never.

Holidate (2020)

I lol'd

[7/10 · 19 December 2023]

I literally lol'd quite a few times in this movie. Adult holiday movies are the great. Bad Santa, the Night Before, Harold & Kumar. There's something about being an adult and still being allowed to embrace holiday movies. This one could technically cover all of them. So not specifically a Christmas movie it can be enjoyed year round. Which makes it that much more entertaining. Goes away from the formula while maintaining its own sense of self. Are there cliches? Yes. Can you see some of the jokes coming? Absolutely. But they land. Almost each and every one of them land. The opening sequence alone kept me going while this movie found it's footing.

Your Christmas or Mine 2 (2023)

Boondoggle!!!

[6/10 · 19 December 2023]

Absolute boondoggle! Don't get me wrong, if you grabbed me and a bunch of my friends and told me we could have an all expenses paid ski vacation with just a little bit of work plus inviting Jane Kracowski(sp) along for the ride I'd be all over it. I know these things are formulaic but how many misunderstandings can you fit in one roof? Also, out of curiosity, we gwon go to Jamaica? Asa has seemingly avoided the curse of child actor and fits the bill of genuine person who happens to be of station. The actress who plays Haley is also genuine and beautiful. Pretty good but the mishaps are too many.

Jingle Bell Bride (2020 TV Movie)

Welcome/Bienvenido

[7/10 · 19 December 2023]

Welcome to the small Afro/latino Alaskan community of Tapeeza. Where we find an expert wedding planner doing everything she can to satisfy a celebrity bridezilla. The cast is pretty good. The story is decent. Although Hallmark is more about inclusion (which I embrace) and stepping out of the formula we still get the touch stones of a Hallmark Christmas movie while somehow remaining fresh. I liked the leads and the supporting cast. The "love" portion wasn't overt but was very well mannered if that makes sense. I hope these two continue to make Hallmark Christmas flicks or are atleast involved if they decide to make movies of the other books.

The Winter Palace (2022 TV Movie)

Better

[6/10 · 16 December 2023]

Much better than their time at the Drive In. Winnie and Harry Connick Sebastian Stan have much better performances. HCSS comes across way less aloof (even though he's European here) and the business mogul from the other flick appears as his assistant. Both turn in worthy performances that make my S. A. D.s forget they're here for awhile. Even tho this has little to nothing to do with the holiday, still a cute story with formulaic but happy shifts. A slight misunderstanding appears here in place of a major one and that's the change we've all been looking for. The only reason it's just a 6 is because these are actually meant to be exactly in that range and that's alright with me.

Christmas at the Drive-In (2022 TV Movie)

Sure I gave it 5 stars

[5/10 · 15 December 2023]

But with a little bit of hope and magic...Harry Connick Sebastian Stan will make me believe he wanted to be there. He approached this movie with all the enthusiasm of a teenager at his in-laws holiday with no ther kids his age around to hang with. There's aloof and there's a this. I've seen him in other stuff so I know he can sell me on bs. I watch these movies for comfort dealing with S. A. D. But I need you to sell it to me. Winnie was great though. Lol. Also I want to say maybe three of these actors are in another Christmas movie. Just out of curiosity, does everybody want a second chance with their high school sweetheart or is it just Christmas movies?

The Holiday Fix Up (2021)

Not quite Awesome...

[6/10 · 13 December 2023]

Captain Awesome fits the bill as a leading man type in these sort've movies. He always has. That being said as a devout Christmas Hallmarkian movie watcher, for me to betray the coven and watch a Lifetime one is very unusual. It was decent. I liked the formulaic story telling. It's comforting. Like a warm blanket and a throw pillow on a couch in front of a fireplace. I watch these things as a coping mechanism for my seasonal depression. This kept my focus. Was clear concise and predictable. Also. Heartfelt. It's no Christmas Comes Twice but it'll do. Sidenote: how you have a Christmas movie starring a twin and have twice in the title but don't use the twin...anyway. 👍🏾

Dragon Fury: Wrath of Fire (2022)

Radioactive, Rasioactiver

[2/10 · 26 October 2023]

I'm waking up to ash and dust I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust I'm breathing in the chemicals I'm breaking in, shaping up, then checking out on the prison bus This is it, the apocalypse Whoa

So I hate watched this. Because I despise me. I feel overly punished. The script is actually flimsier than the other one. The dragons look better than the last movie because instead of terribad CGI, they just photoshopped most of them. None of the characters are even remotely likable. The main character returns to a place she's sworn never to return to. The uniforms atleast have gotten a little better. Ad-libs still rule...poorly. The convuluted story the "bad guy" tells as to why he hates the main character is so convuluted I'll need therapy to figure it out. Anyway. Here's Wonderwall...

Dragon Fury (2021)

Imagine Dragons but...Radioactive, radioactive...

[2/10 · 26 October 2023]

It's hot buttered garbage. The special effects, terrible. The acting, decent. The script, what script? If you've ever seen a 1950's film about atomic bombs and giant creatures, well, watch that again. The only enjoyable part of this movie is the actress who plays Nessa. I like her in everything she's in. The script seems almost ad-lobbed but by people who have no idea what military jargon is. My favorite thing is all the "military " characters wearing random camouflage clothing to look "military". I will be hate watching the sequel after this. I will also be listening to "Radioactive" by "Imagine Dragons"...just kidding. Anyway, here's Wonderwall...

The Last Sentinel (2007)

As a guy who grew up I. The 80's and 90's

[5/10 · 25 October 2023]

Jesse V. Johnson is my spirit director. He does the things similar to the movies I grew up on. Sure it's on a much smaller budget but the ideas and plot points are all solid. Plus, the rise of snark queen Sackhoff diddling the strong silent types makes me wanna shut up and workout. The use of Keith Davids voice in this movie is also fantastic. Might be the best part of the final act. Sure the gun fights don't make sense and the acting is stiff cause Don Wilson (no Dragon) is a much better fighter than he is a thespian. It's like Universal Soldier meets Terminator which, as a wee lad, I would've murdered my foster parents for.

My Name Is Vendetta (2022)

Leon: The Afterschool Special

[5/10 · 22 August 2023]

It builds on the idea of Leon the Professional but nowhere near charming or elegant. Thankfully no incest or hints or it either. But most of the script was uneven and the storyline stopped short. Of the two main characters the daughter is by far the most unpleasant. Her tantrums seemed random and her not listening absolutely comes back to bite them. The use of the Beretta APX in a film is probably the saving grace from me. As a "gun" "guy" it's one of my favorite pistols to come out in recent years. You expect as much in an Italian movie but it was still nice to see. The conversation towards the end and the ending itself leave much to be desired but Matilda would've been proud...

The Tomorrow War (2021)

Love the cast. Plot holes weapons picks...not so much.

[6/10 · 18 April 2023]

Casting was fantastic. The plot holes were many. This is to be expected with time travel. But the science, to an extent, was suspension of disbeliefable. Lol. But the dudes who went in multiple times and the people from the future didn't once thing to arm their future army better? Ballistically speaking the only people prepared for a threat that was well studied was the main characters dad and the repeat jumpers. With that being said, I've watched this movie like four times. It's just fun. With enough jump scares to keep you going. JK is fantastic as the main characters dad and there's a real strong chemistry...where there shouldn't be one.

Ambulance (2022)

Old Bay Seasoning (Money Train 2)

[6/10 · 18 April 2023]

So if you took Money Train, mated it with The Island and let the child be raised by someone who watched Heat once in 7th grade and thought it was cool but couldn't quite remember everything about it, you'd get this movie. It's really predictable and still entertaining. As with most Mike Bay offerings the female lead manages to stay gorgeous throughout. The male leads either have or don't have a moral compass. And operators, everybody's an operator. JG spends the whole movie accurately pewning people with no red dot and his "flip up back up sights" down. Damn you Old Bay seasoning, you made me think these seasoned fries were crab fries like I'm back at Chickie and Pete's.

The Rhythm Section (2020)

Wait what

[6/10 · 15 February 2021]

That's it. I like the music tho. But short. Concise. Abrupt. It's like if you jammed La Femme Nikita into Peppermint while watching Alias but executing everything half ass yet still managing to get the job done. This review is officially longer than her training montage.

Red Dawn (2012)

Meh

[4/10 · 2 December 2020]

As a huge, HUGE!!! fan of the original I've actively avoided seeing this movie. It wasn't the worst thing I've ever seen in my life (I'm looking at you D-Wars) but the fact that Josh Peck looked like a live action walking faceapp switch thru the entire movie says everything you need to know about it.

Holiday Rush (2019)

For what it is, it's pretty good

[6/10 · 12 December 2019]

The writing was decent. The actors really carried the jokes. Comedic timing was decent and I felt a feel.

Peppermint (2018)

It's no Colombiana

[8/10 · 10 August 2019]

This actually wasn't a bad movie. Fairly decent actioner. Probably ill times with the likes of Atomic Blonde and Colombianas in the world. Sort've jumps right into the violence. Most of the tropes were kinda generic but still entertaining.

Robin Hood (2018)

Not as bad as it's made out to be

[7/10 · 30 July 2019]

If there's a major fault in this movie it's that it may be too ambitious. It tried to modernize and retell an age old story. It was slick to the point of too slick. Although flawed I still found it entertaining. They took major liberties with tech and other things of those times but at its core it was entertaining.

Captain Marvel (2019)

Sets up Endgame rather nicely.

[7/10 · 19 March 2019]

It's a good not great origin stop gap that Marvel seems to get better with over time (Captain America the First Avenger, Thor) but it actually does a better job than Thor did.

The Dragon Prince (2018– )

Liked it but give me more

[8/10 · 18 September 2018]

I thought the animation and storyline was pretty good. But where they leave you, IMO, is terrible. Not terrible as in a bad idea, but terrible as in "how much longer do I have to wait for season 2!?!?!?" Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.