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Elvis (2022)
Soleil Brulant
Loved almost everything about this movie. Especially the CGI look of it and cinematography. Modern mixed with the old.
Two grades down for unnecessary wokeism.
The Post (2017)
Great movie, but...
It's a great movie, compelling story, perfect pace, wonderful camera work that creates tension. A lot to love about this.
2 grades lower for some melodramatic woke (feminist) content that serves no purpose, mainly towards the end of the film.
Cheers.
Safe Haven (2013)
A Sparks romance with no sparks
The basic plot revolves around an attractive young woman running away from her own murderous past, or so it seems at first. There are deeper subplots, but let us not ruin potential viewers' potential suspense by explicating them. Let us just say that she settles in a small town and tries to rebuild her life from scratch, but the ghost of Christmas past comes back to haunt her.
That is the basic plot. The basal genre of the movie is romance (considering that it is based on a Nicholas Sparks' novel it is only natural for it to be a romantic movie) with mild hints of thriller and drama. One could best label it as a romantic thriller.
Julianne Hough plays the lead woman and Josh Duhamel the leading man. Their performances are nothing praise-worthy, but they are not bad either. However, they do lack on-screen chemistry as I have felt no electricity, no Sparks (get it?) between them. Moreover, that says a lot about the movie as it lasts for nearly two hours, which means that it took its time developing the story that led to nothing. The one weak link in the cast is David Lyons whose performance is ridiculously exaggerated. It just ruins the character.
The story is a two hour rundown of the most common clichés found in movies with two notable efforts to produce the much needed twist. One works rather well, the other one leaves you wondering why. Nevertheless, between those two, there is not much to work with. Therefore, the story is awful, it develops slowly (that is, it is boring at times), and the script is no deeper than the safe romantic shallow waters this movie treads. It just might be the worst movie based on one of Sparks' books (but to be fair it is not much to begin with).
Another low point of notice is music. It is probably one of the most cringe- and puke-worthy soundtracks I have ever heard. However, I do not believe that I am the target audience so some people might find it OK. I found it laughably horrible and someone ought to have lost his or her job over it (I am looking at you Deborah Lurie).
There you have it. This movie boils down to an overly long, overly cheesy and mellow romantic movie, with a subtext of thriller in it, which unfortunately leads to nowhere. At times boring, at times cringe-worthy in the acting department, most of the time puke-worthy in the music department, with characters you could not care less about, with twists that work only half the time and you could not care less about, it is an emotionless, forgettable romance.
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The Place Beyond the Pines (2012)
Crime Doesn't Pay, Does Honesty?
The Place Beyond the Pines (2012) Basic info: this movie is a crime drama concerning a bank robber played by Ryan Gosling, a cop played by Bradley Cooper, and their sons (played by Dane DeHaan and Emory Cohen respectively). Those are the lead actors, but plenty of essential side characters, side stories and nuances marvelously build up the main story. The director and writer of this movie is Derek Cianfrance (note: there are other people also credited for the story and screenplay, namely Ben Coccio and Darius Marder).
To start, the writing is beautiful. The movie takes its time developing the story, which means that it runs for 140 minutes. Do not be averted by that fact since you may miss a real gem of a film. The story consists of three interwoven parts and it speaks of life. Moreover, it does so not in an "I want to poke my eyes out" dull way, but rather as an attention grabbing, "wondering what is next" thrilling variety. The best way to describe the story is to say that it is real. There are no clichés, no Hollywood stereotypes, or at least they eluded my watchful eyes. Maybe bedazzling by the movie caused it. Therefore, the story is grand, but what of the characters? They may be even superior. They spring at the viewer full of life, they avow you, not on an emotional level (at least not to me), but rather on that basic level where you wonder how do they craft it so real? Are they even acting? To put it simply, Ryan Gosling is startling, Bradley Cooper is unbelievable and Eva Mendes is astonishing. Dane DeHaan is not far-off behind them. Kanye West rapped it best with his song Amazing.
There aren't exactly any vital downsides to the movie. It might be slow (read dull) at times and at certain moments, but the story necessitates that. Mike Patton (of Faith No More fame) did the score on this one and it is much in the vein of something Mike Patton would do
a weird fit. Certainly takes some time getting used to. Even afterward, the music does not sit perfectly. One film in particular springs to mind upon hearing the score, and that is Drive. However, while in that movie the score sets up atmosphere perfectly, here it is kind of deficient. It is sinister and twisted, somewhat horror like, and at all times you are just waiting for a monster to soar out and kill something. I presume the point was to make you realize that the tale you are watching is a dark, grim tale, you could not possibly get pleasure from, yet somehow you do. That is the most truthful telltale sign of a splendid movie. This one is for remembrance.
FINAL MARK: 9 / 10
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Serbuan maut (2011)
Mildly enjoyable action flick!
Pros: 1. Excellently timed action 2. Fantastic fighting scenes, somewhat realistic (fighting, not the shooting) 3. Incredible level of violence 4. Superbly brutal executions and deaths
Cons: 1. Horrible acting 2. Shallow characters 3. Laughable story 4. Borderline idiotic SWAT team
The Raid: Redemption has the ability to pump you up with adrenaline while watching it's impressive fighting scenes, but also has a tendency to make you laugh with the stupidity of a professional SWAT team. If you're searching for impressive acting, character development, superb story or story twists, look elsewhere, but if you're in for some brutal executions and incredible martial arts, then I suggest you watch this movie.
Keyhole (2011)
Film noir turned art disaster...
Pros: 1. Black and white look of the film 2. Film noir setting 3. Forced nudity
Cons: 1. Poor acting 2. Blurred story 3. Over the top noir moniker, poorly executed 4. Poorly done artistic visions 5. Forced nudity
Keyhole is a dead, boring, dreadful "art" movie that fails to entertain. Dull to the point of wanting to poke your eyes out, you're left wondering who finances horrendous disasters like this one. The setting is probably the only redeeming quality of this movie. Avoid unless you dig the "artsy" type of movies. And avoid if you don't like the uncalled for nudity from male and female cast that are supposed to build the artistic integrity of this film, and yet come out as WTF(!?) moments in the movie.
Conan the Barbarian (2011)
Take away the beard from Khal Drogo and you get Conan...
To enjoy this movie, one has to set aside all comparisons to the original film, 'cause it's really like comparing apples and oranges. The two movies are nothing alike and shouldn't be compared at all. That being said, this movie does not attempt to recreate the old one whatsoever, for it would be a futile attempt. Instead of that they focused on a different kind of story.
Conan the Barbarian isn't the greatest movie of all time, but it also isn't the worst. Actually I was taken by surprise as to how "not-bad" this movie really was, even though I clearly expected it to suck. I wouldn't call it very good, but this new Conan seems to flow very well. Expect lots of action scenes (which are pretty standard for the genre, but not at all unnerving), some nudity (it would be a sin to make a Conan movie without a pair of boobs, and Rachel Nichols provides a set of perfect ones), pretty cliché ending (what would we do without them??), and not a lot from the acting department (you didn't see that one coming, did ya?).
Take away the beard from Khal Drogo and you get Conan. It pretty much sums up the movie. If it was more like Game of Thrones, it would be spectacular, but since it wasn't, it isn't. So to sum things up, this movie surprises, due to the fact that it's nothing like the original, it has some beautiful scenes, and the overall look of a movie is expensive and quite nice. Action scenes are pretty standard with lots of sword wielding and spins, they look more like a ballet performance than a fight. Over the top blood spilling looks kind of silly and they should have made it look more realistic. You can expect a few scenes to really get on your nerves, but the movie as a whole is worth a watch. And worth forgetting right after-wards.
The Fighter (2010)
Try not to get knocked out with brilliant acting...
Acting. That's the movies stand out point. Brilliant acting. Not just because of the Oscars, but really you have to see it for yourself. The story that is centered on a boxer from Lowell, MS, comes of as a pretty standard boxing story (with a few twists), even though it's based on a true story. It's a drama to the fullest sense of the word, but not uninteresting one.
The story develops just the way it should, even though it has a few loose ends. The movie is written well and the boxing scenes are, more or less, well made. Well made meaning they look realistic. Two main actresses have put in wonderful performances, and Mark Wahlberg also puts in a solid performance (you cannot not like his character), but unfortunately (or fortunately) they are all outplayed by Christian Bale. Bale's Oscar-winning portrayal of a former boxer who lives in the past, and is also a crack addict, is pure genius. Just for the sake of his acting you should watch this movie.
The movie flows very well, it's never boring, it has just about the right amount of boxing scenes vs. everyday life scenes, it has brilliant acting, and a few shocking, tear-inducing scenes, which are more than welcome in this kind of movie. A warm recommendation to everyone, even to the uninterested kind, based solely on acting if not on everything else.
Drive Angry (2011)
Watch "Drive Angry" and try not to after-wards...
What can be said about a Nicolas Cage flick, that hasn't been said already. From the now legendary movies "Con Air" and "Face Off" his career has been on a steady downfall, for years now. Occasional bearable performances (like the one in "The Sorcerer's Apprentice", mainly because the movie didn't utterly suck) from him, remind us that in those distant days, Nicolas Cage had some sense in choosing his movies. Nowadays he just "stars" in any crap they throw on his table.
This particular movie seems as though it was meant to be seen by 12-year old's as it contains a large number of "cool" moves and "cool" action scenes. Or rather a number of scenes that want to look cool, but come of as a mockery. Seemingly interesting story is left ruined by the quality of the script, which is indeed very poor and borders with absurdity. One thing that's even worse than script is directing. And another thing that's even more worse is acting. One of the most horrific performances of the, now notorious, Nicolas Cage, but in this movie, luckily for him, he's not alone. Billy Burke and David Morse complete the trilogy of bad acting. William Fichtner has a strange role, so he acts accordingly, which produces a performance you may or may not like, depending on your preference of quirky characters. The other standout is the beautiful, feisty, southern girl played by Amber Heard. She does an OK performance which comes off as a standout due to catastrophic acting all around her.
The motives of the characters are well portrayed, but everything else is horrible. Some scenes are absolute rubbish, and one cannot help but wonder, why, oh why... Avoid at all costs.
Letters to Juliet (2010)
A distasteful romantic adventure in Italy...
Letters to Juliet is, to put it simply, your every-day, average, plain romantic comedy. More of a romantic movie than a romantic comedy, that is. By the scarce laughs it produces, mainly due to its extremely poor acting, it cannot be called a comedy. The movie contains all the ingredients of a typical Hollywood romantic movie. Hot young protagonist (Amanda Seyfried) who is romantic to the point of absurd, but so cheerful she befriends everyone she meets on her journey through Italy. A neglecting boyfriend of our hot protagonist who cares more about his food than about his fiancée (like a true Italian played by a Mexican actor). A staggering but obnoxious impostor whom our hot protagonist cannot stand yet, eventually, she falls for him in a series of very predictable events.
It's a "feel happy" kind of movie, but utterly destroyed by the poor acting and even worse script. The few laughs it provides are based on the poorness of the script, rather than they are on the script itself. Awful, awful movie with nothing interesting in it.