frellingdren Reviews

The Dunwich Horror (2008 TV Movie)

As bad as they come...

[1/10 · 19 May 2009]

This movie reminds me of something you would see at a local film festival (and I am not talking about Sundance or Canne).

It is one of the worst Lovecraft attempts to date. Dean Stockwell is wasted. Combs is passable... but also wasted (not that Combs ever really raises the bar of what he is a part of). The acting is all bottom of the barrel. The editing, direction and effects are horrible.

If I had to scrape the bottom of the barrel for something positive to mention, it would have to be the sets and locations. Those were well chosen.

I rarely say that a film is so devoid of merit as to deem it a complete waste of time and money, but this is one of those rare films. Save your time and money. You will just be sad you squandered them watching this trash.

However, if you like B-level schlock for the sake of a good laugh... you might be able to suspend disbelief long enough to laugh at this. But... even that would be a stretch. It is as unwatchable as movies come.

The Skeleton Key (2005)

Takes itself seriously.

[7/10 · 13 December 2005]

This movie didn't really scare me at all. There were a few creepy moments... but over all... it was pretty average. I think the sets and the props and the script were all fine... but the director just glossed over too many areas that could have tightened up the tension in the film. Just my opinion... maybe I have been watching too much Asian horror lately.

However. I did enjoy watching this movie.... mainly because it took itself seriously. The acting was all good... none of that "Friends" and "Buffy" type acting that invalidates half of the horror movies that come out anymore. It was a little sad to see John Hurt reduced to the non-speaking role of the invalid... but. Everyone was good, nonetheless.

If you are looking for something interesting to look at... this is worth the time. It has a good ending and it keeps you guessing. But. Its not a classic by any means.

Gus www.shirleyfilms.com

The Girl in the Woods (2005)

Wow.

[10/10 · 7 December 2005]

Wow.

How can I describe this masterpiece??? I honestly don't know if there are sufficient words in the human language to properly address how mind-numbingly incredible this film was to behold.

Stunning. Thought provoking. A horror short with a real head on it's shoulders.

This movie blew my mind! Put a hole right in it! I will be cleaning brains out of the carpet for weeks!

I recommend this movie! Right up there with Lord Of The Rings.

-Me.

The I Inside (2004)

A good film...

[7/10 · 5 December 2005]

I will make this brief.

This is a decent movie. Is it completely groundbreaking? No. Will you enjoy it?

I DID.

There are ton of people on here talking about how it doesn't make sense, theorizing about the ending...comparing it to Butterfly Effect/The Jacket/... yadda yadda.

If you have half a brain in your head, you will at least think this movie is worth watching. The end is NOT hard to figure out. There really AREN'T any massive plot holes. Its just a good psychological thriller... with a hint of sci-fi/horror. The acting is 85% good.

This movie will not change your life. But. If you are like me and you have seen almost everything else the world of cinema has to offer.... this movie really isn't as bad as a lot of what is out there.

Oh. P.S. The fact that every time a movie like this comes out... people compare it to THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT... makes me want to vomit.

Butterfly Effect = 2 stars. The I Inside = 7 stars.

Oldboy (2003)

A well done film. Better than 90% of what is out there today.

[9/10 · 5 December 2005]

I will make this brief.

A lot of people have come on here to talk about how this movie DOESN'T live up to the hype.

In my opinion, the hype was just right. IMDb gives this around an 8.5 and that is about what I would give it. It's an incredible well done and stylish movie. Is it GROUNDBREAKING? Well. Yeah. It kinda is... in a few ways.

I am not going to write a long review. Sufficed to say.... if you have a brain in your head, you will appreciate this movie on some level. It IS violent and tasteless in some ways... but... really nothing that new or brutal. I was actually surprised at the low level of violence in this movie (after reading all these negative reviews about violence for the sake of violence). I felt every moment of violence in this film was justified. If I went through what HE did... I would be just as violent.

Anyway. Thats all I have to say. If you are grappling with the decision to rent this... here is all I can say: If you play a lot of Skateboarding video games and like Adam Sandler.... or if your idea of a good horror movie is "Hush, Hush, Sweet Charlotte",... then you should probably skip this one. If you are a fan of original, innovative film making and you don't mind a little of the old "ultraviolence", then try this one on for size.

I (personally) cannot wait to see the rest in the series.

Gus www.shirleyfilms.com

Dead End (I) (2003)

I liked it... will you?

[7/10 · 15 November 2005]

Well. Everyone has an opinion... and here is mine.

I liked this movie. Not a ton. But. It held my attention. I enjoyed the concept of these people who were basically stuck in a car... on a road that never ends... No sets really... just... a car. Nice idea. Creeped my out. I would recommend it.

(spoliers only in the paragraph ahead) A lot of the "plot gaps" are excusable in the sense that ... well... they are all dead. And in their own little hell. At least the ending didn't completely invalidate the entire movie (ala HIGH TENSION). I think that people on here who are saying that the screenplay was horrible... ? I don't know. It was just different to me. It was all dialog. I like that. Some people don't. I really liked Mindwalk and Glengarry Glen Ross ... but I am sure not everyone does (and yes I know this movie isn't on that level... but you know what I am saying).

I think the claims that the acting is HORRIBLE ... are pretty far off. It wasn't Oscar material... but... it wasn't ridiculously bad. I thought it was decent. People who are saying this is the worst acting they have ever seen... clearly haven't seen much. Rent STREET TRASH ...or watch any Jennifer Aniston movie and then watch DEAD END again. I thought Ray Wise was 10 times better than Cary Elwes was in SAW (love Cary... but he SUCKED in that movie).

People like different things. I read peoples posts...trying to decide if a movie is worth watching. The reviews of this one were ALL OVER THE PLACE. But I decided to give it a try. I am glad I did. I went in with mediocre expectations... and was pleasantly surprised by the ambiance of the movie.

If you are a fan of cinema of ALL sorts... you will probably like this movie. If you are very specific about what you like (if SAW and HIGH TENSION are your favorites... or you only like horror movies with a Freddy, or a Jason, or a Pinhead...or 7 teenagers that all have to die before the credits roll)... you can probably skip this one.

If you are wondering what movies I like in this genre (you can compare tastes).... here are some. Event Horizon, Ring (American and Japanese), the Evil Deads, Ju-On, Tale of Two Sisters, David Lynch, Three Extremes, Dawn Of The Dead (both), The Shining, Fright Night, the Changling...probably a million more...

Movies I hated: Saw, Whispering Corridors, High Tension, Boo!, Boogeyman....exorcist 2, 4 and 5 (gag!), when a stranger calls.

Hope this helps someone... in some way.

Gus www.shirleyfilms.com

Boo (2005)

So bad ... there aren't even words... but I'll try.

[2/10 · 1 November 2005]

I give this one 2 stars because there are some commendable special effects and the director (editor?) has a good feel of how to put the footage together to get a nice "jump" out of you. Also... the set (an abandoned hospital) is nicely done and quite spooky (if cliché).

However...

EVERYTHING ELSE ABOUT THIS MOVIE SUCKS.

I read someone on here say that the acting was good. Dear god in heaven. There is NO ONE ON THIS PLANET who would say that other than someone who worked on this movie. I couldn't BELIEVE how bad the acting was. What gets me... is when I see acting this bad... it makes me think that ANYONE OFF THE STREET could act better than these people... but then I think.... thats EXACTLY who these people are. Wannabes off the street who have NO BUSINESS ACTING. My god. It was so painful I stopped the disc 3 times over a course of 3 days. I simply couldn't get through it.

The writing is so bad... I just cant even think of words to describe it. Trite. Contrived. Boring. Uninspired. Unoriginal. I honestly... feel so drained of my life energy by this movie... I don't even want to talk about it anymore.

If you are a TRUE HORROR FAN. PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! Heed my warning and AVOID THIS DRIVEL. I wish I could think of something as bad as this to compare it to... but... this makes movies like... "The Unnamable" and "Street Trash" look like "Citizen Kane". Do yourself a favor... kill yourself instead. It will be less painful...regardless of the method you choose.

Dead Birds (2004)

Very twisted, creepy, well made haunt.

[9/10 · 18 April 2005]

I have to say....while not perfect... this movie is MUCH better than 90% of the crap that is being released these days. Honestly...I just saw Boogeyman in the theater.... and ... HOW DID THAT MOVIE GET MADE? DEAD BIRDS was SO well acted... so well produced and directed. It makes me so sad that this never went to the theaters.

I can see why tho.

Its a period piece, for one. Also. There are one or two special effects shots that (while creepy) are just a little too fake looking. That, coupled with the fact that this is the kind of film that doesn't really have a clear cut ending (something the mindless sheeple of this country need...apparently), makes it clear why it came to video.

Now that I have pointed out its flaws... heh.

THIS MOVIE IS SO WELL DONE... it makes me sad. Henry Thomas keeps proving himself over and over again as a competent, well trained actor. Its sad that he doesn't get better roles. Everything about this film is high quality. The sets, the film, the actors... everything. When you get a straight to video movie... you think its going to be crap. THIS MOVIE IS GREAT.

I actually own it now... and intend to watch it again soon. I really recommend checking this one out. If you like spooky, twisted Ghost/Haunted House Stories.... you will not be disappointed.

Inheritance (I) (2004)

Worst of the worst. How does crap like this get MADE?!?!?!?!!

[1/10 · 18 April 2005]

I am a very open minded movie-goer. And I have seen EVERYTHING out there (in terms of horror/sci-fi)...even the crop of low-budget, filmed on video crap that is flooding the video stores these days.

This movie... was one of the WORST THINGS I HAVE EVER MADE MYSELF SIT THROUGH IN MY ENTIRE LIFE.

I RARELY write reviews like this. But. I often come on IMDb and other such sites and read reviews and look at ratings... to get a basic idea of the tone of a film. I recently saw DEAD BIRDS because of IMDb reviews and really, really enjoyed it. It is now clear to me now that the only people who could have POSSIBLY enjoyed this movie enough to write theses glowing reviews I have read about it...were people who worked on it or stand to make a buck from it.

There is NOTHING redeeming about this movie. NOTHING. Well... I take that back. There is ONE good camera shot in the entire video. But even that shot lasts 2 minutes too long... so. yeah. NOTHING REDEEMING.

I don't mean to be a jerk... but. PEOPLE. PLEASE! Save your free rental.... this movie is not worth it! I turned it off after 40 minutes... and then decided to MAKE myself watch the rest so that I wouldn't feel like a heel when I came online and vented my frustration at having spent 4$ on this slime.

The main girl (from HALO, I hear...which I love)... is NOT LEADING LADY MATERIAL. She seemed like... a girl in my high school drama class who was only there because it was an easy credit. Her friend at the diner was more leading lady than she was. NOTE TO THAT ACTRESS: Please take my humble advice and GET A NOSE JOB. If you do that.... you will go much farther than drivel like this.

The other actors in this movie (her boyfriend especially) were the WORST OF THE WORST. My god in heaven. There aren't even words. Where did you dig these people up? Maybe it wasn't the actors... maybe it was just that the script was SO BAD. ... No... It was BOTH. Horrid actors AND horrid script. Did I mention the horrid music yet? Reminded me of Friday the 13th: The Series... only... not quite that good.

Some of the dialog was SO BAD... that I sampled it to my computer for future fun. My favorite line was: "You'll like death... its boring!"

Please God in heaven.... Please. Hear my prayer. Stop people from making this kind of crap anymore. I honestly feel like I am going to have an aneurysm if I keep thinking about people spending untold hours on a waste of time such as this.

Someone, somewhere gave this movie a greenlight. What planet am I living on? I could film myself clipping my toe-nails and it would be better than this WASTE OF TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Pulse (2001)

Hard to review...

[12 December 2004]

Not that anyone cares what i think... but...

This movie has SO many GREAT ideas.... its really sad to look back on it and realize how little really happened... or was even explained. The movie just really dragged. (and I am a big fan of Asian horror and am quite used the the difference in pacing overseas). There were some really horrifying moments in this movie... and some really original ideas. But... it just never comes together ... at all. This movie felt like a dream that I couldn't wake up from. Maybe thats kinda what they were going for. And actually... i liked that feeling. But. Still....

To any horror movie buff who is looking for something new to check out... this movie IS worth seeing. Just don't expect the next Ju-On or The Shining.

Its really....convoluted. And... tedious. But. Still decent. Better than Dark Water. And more creative than anything to come out of Hollywood in the past few years.

6.8/10 ... yeah.

When a Stranger Calls (1979)

This movie is for old folkes, 8-13 year olds, and sheltered Christians...

[12 December 2004]

I have seen a lot of horror movies. This one...is not the worst movie I have ever seen.... but its... just... old. Its dated and doesn't wear its age well. I had heard the hype about this movie... and decided to check it out. I am only writing this review to help people LIKE ME avoid this movie.

Don't get me wrong... its not BAD. Its just not... anything special. And its not in the least bit scary. By todays standards... this movie would be rated PG. This is the kind of horror movie that old folkes, 8-13 year olds, and sheltered Christians who are afraid to see anything truly horrifying would enjoy. Sometimes, I enjoy a simple (classic) horror tale (ie The Woman In Black, The Changeling), but this movie literally almost put me to sleep. If they would have just made a 30 minute Tales From The Darkside episode out of the first half hour of the movie... it might have been passable. But. This . is just... BORING.

So. If REALLY scary movies are too much for you (The Ring, Ju-On, TCM, The Shining), this is a tame little suspense flick that somehow falls into the horror section of your video store that you might like. If you want to be SCARED... check out something else.

Dagon (2001)

Great film.

[9/10 · 1 July 2004]

You know... A lot of people go into "low-budget" movies expecting WAY too much. I saw this movie on Sci-Fi channel... and even though it was clearly cut to hell.... I could still tell it was a new classic (in the vein of Evil Dead and Dead Alive). I rented it soon after and WHOA! Talk about TV edits! This movie is 10 times better when NOT on TV. I am a lovecraft fan... and even though this movie is loosely based on one of his stories....it stands up as a really good film in its own right. The lead guy is superb with his comic timing. He is laughable and bumbling (a la Ash), but he is unique enough (nerdy) and pulls it off...unlike so many other ash rip-offs. The computer effects were not GREAT...they were not Lord Of The Rings caliber... but they are better than what we saw in Enterprise the past few seasons. I guess I just really liked this movie... because... well... i feel like, if I ended up in that town... thats exactly what I would have done. In a John Crighton/Ash/hax0r/nerd sorta way. If you watch this movie expecting a slow-burn, nightmare, suspend-your-disbelief scenario...you wont be disappointed. If you are looking for The Ring 2.... look elsewhere. Oh... and Bubba Ho-Tep rocks. Rent that too.