RecklessTurtle Reviews

Halo (2022– )

Quite boring and slow paced for a game adaptation

[4/10 · 5 April 2024]

I pushed myself to finish the first season and started the second season. I cannot believe how boring the first season was. Why is this show so slow paced? I am all in favor of good background story telling but my God it is slow paced. The scenes about Master Chief's childhood is repeated over and over again. As a viewer, we understood what's going on in the second episode, why drag it further? Is it because of the budget maybe? They must have known that the CGI budget is huge for the show and just to pass the time, they drag the story telling part? Same with the Kwan story line. In the first season, it literally goes nowhere. 2 episodes prior to season finale, they simply dropped her storyline. Why is she in the show? Can't figure out other than to fill the time. Overall, this is a very slow paced game adaptation with questionable CGI.

Murder Mystery 2 (2023)

Aiming for mediocrity

[3/10 · 2 April 2023]

This is an Adam Sandler movie through and through. That should tell all you need. The plot, if you could call it, is just an excuse to move the movie to the next set piece, regardless if it makes sense or not. Adam Sandler lands the jokes as per his style. If you are a fan of high--school grade jokes with Sandler's timing, you will have a good time at least on the comedy-side. The worst part of the movie was Jennifer Aniston. I understand that she is getting old but with all the botox and fillings, she can't give any facial expressions. It is like watching a latex-doll. Also, she walks in a weird way and didn't run once in an action-comedy movie. Her green-screened scenes also look off, the CGI is not on par for a movie with this budget. Overall, it is an extremely lazy movie which aims mediocrity.

Black Site (I) (2022)

Lame story accompanied by comical acting

[3/10 · 6 March 2023]

Surprised that Michelle Monaghan agreed to star in this low budget nonsensical movie. I am hoping that she was paid well. The movie must have been written by very young screen writers as the story has holes the size of of a medium city. Certain plots are left with no conclusion or explanation. Even the most critical scene, which the whole movie is founded upon could be deciphered by an average viewer in about 7 seconds yet the movie pretends it is a huge mystery and big reveal. And the ending makes no sense at all. Basically, that's not how drones work, writers. A simple Wikipedia search would have fixed your errors. Lastly, it is cute that they thought there will be a second movie after the success of this one. Maybe it was made for a joke? Funny...

Living (2022)

Heartfilling story and excellent story telling

[9/10 · 5 March 2023]

I was pleasantly surprised how good the cinematography and the story telling was. The story is already given in the synopsis but how it is told and the quality of the acting surprised me. The dialogs were mostly hearth warming and feel genuine, the drama aspect was superb. Shots reflect the 50's Britain atmosphere perfectly. The screen writers didn't spoon feed you the narrative, which is a surprise these days. There are a few points where you need arrive to your own conclusions. The chemistry between the lead actor and actress is excellent. Overall, if you are looking for a slow pace, well constructed and beautifully shot movie, don't pass on "Living".

The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (2022– )

Storylines that go nowhere

[2/10 · 4 January 2023]

For a show that is supposed to be the most expensive TV show ever, I can't understand how the producers couldn't get even a proper storyline. After finishing the show, everything that happens seem to be by random luck or coincidence. There are huge logical problems, you literally had to switch off your brain to enjoy what's going on (CGI is nice). The stunts are so artificial, it feels like a game which didn't implement the physics properly. And the worst part? The dialogs! The level is community-theater level, not a smitten above. Terrible, terrible dialogs! Amazon should be ashamed with this show and I am saying this as a non-Tolkien fan. I managed to read half of the first book, finished the "The Two Towers" and didn't even bother with the last book of the trilogy. The Rings of Power storyline managed to bore even a guy like me!

Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

Thanks for non-wokeness

[10/10 · 3 July 2022]

Finally a proper sequel where the original story is not ret-conned and the original hero's fell victim to their new representative woke counterparts. This movie plays homage to its roots and the story is kept as relevant and believable as possible. CGI is kept to a minimum and the actors gave their best to elevate the story. Top marks, well done Mr. Cruise!

Yakamoz S-245 (2022)

Survival story saturated with Turkish drama

[3/10 · 10 June 2022]

As a native Turkish speaker, I was excited to see what Netflix would achieve in a relatively large budget survival setup. Unfortunately, the survival part of the story is completely shadowed by the drama and stupidity of the characters and story lines. Dialogs are obvious attempts of passing the time until the next set piece. They don't move the story, they don't serve to character development. Even the military guys act as if they are spoiled children. You guys serve in a submarine, you should act accordingly. One moment they act like professionals, in the next one they are extras in "Walking Dead". Maybe the show didn't have a military adviser? The main characters are OK I guess. Once again, the antagonist is totally unrealistic and over the top, makes you fast forward his scenes. As a plus side, the set pieces are good and the CGI is superb for a Turkish-drama series. Everything else, mediocre at best.

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

Cash grab with almost non-existing effort

[4/10 · 13 February 2022]

Why was there a need for this story? The justification makes no sense. The storytelling is lazy. Even the CGI seems to have taken a backstep. I understand that the leads are much older but even the young actors perform physically less. Finally, apart from Morpheus and Bugs, all other support characters have zero development time. During the runtime, you don't even remember their faces. I heard that this was supposed to be another trilogy, I hope this movie makes so much loss that remaining movies are scrapped by now! The Matrix story with Neo and & Trinity are done and dusted. Please make new stories if you want to milk the franchise.

Eternals (2021)

No redeeming qualities other than diversity

[2/10 · 25 January 2022]

I find it sad that Marvel has lost their touch after Endgame. The writing was on the wall with Captain Marvel but I never thought that they would go as shallow as the Eternals. This movie, for some reason, introduces ton of new characters and lore that no one heard of or even cared about. The first 10 minutes sets the tone of the movie. It can't connect with the audience and never explains who does what and why. Half the time you can't even remember the character names. In the third act when they were talking about Ajak, we were looking each other "Which one was Ajak? Oh, Selma Hayek... Ok..." That's never a good sign. In the end, we assigned nicknames to the characters, the fat one, the black-girl, the child, Dinesh, Angelina, weirdo, etc. Special effects were Marvel quality but they tried to follow the Transformers route in that, multiple CGI characters collide with each other and you have no idea what is going on. Oh and finally, the story has so many blatant plot-holes, half way through the movie, you have to shut down that part of your brain in order to continue watching. Final score: 2/10 and I'm being generous.

Brazen (2022)

Must have been written by a student

[2/10 · 15 January 2022]

Quite surprised to see Milano in such a low budget, non-interesting movie. The plot is extremely linear and totally surprise-free. From the start of the movie, the killer is blatantly obvious and personally, I was expecting some kind of plot twist but alas, there was none. The casting is straight out of a Hallmark movie, they are of community theater quality. Even Milano is giving the least amount of effort. Her physical appearance is straight of soccer-mom, I don't think she even tried to lose some weight and get in shape. I guess the producers couldn't find any one famous enough to star in this piece. Summary: Don't waste your time, swipe left!

Santa Inc. (2021)

Animation was good, storyline not so much

[3/10 · 6 December 2021]

Pros: Animations are of high quality, voice acting is superb, cinematography is engaging. Basically, the production quality is above average.

Cons: The storyline is extremely linear and the R-Rating is wasted for obvious, momentary jokes. For such a shallow storyline, 8 Episodes are too long. I feel this could be wrapped-up in no more than 4 episodes. Occasionally, the story stalled, I lost interest and fast forwarded, which is never a good sign. I wish the show focused more on the story and less on giving a "message".

Spinning Out (2020)

Real talent was to convince Scodelario and Jones to star in this

[3/10 · 20 October 2021]

Make no mistake, this is a by-the-numbers soap-opera. It uses all the clichés in the book to create tension and provoke emotions. I could only watch the first 3 episodes as the plot was so predictable, I could almost tell what's gonna happen by the end of the episode. Apart from the leads, the acting is community theater at best. I didn't know that Netflix made such "cheap" productions. If you want a time killer and have nothing else to watch, this might be a good option but you really need to switch of your brain.

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (2010)

Lackluster and very linear

[4/10 · 9 October 2021]

This movie follows an extremely linear story, you can almost guess what the next set piece is going to be. There is no suspense, no plot twists and absolutely no thrill. The action pieces fall flat, the teens can't act in fight scenes if their lives depended on it. I'm guessing the producers planned less than 2 weeks for fight choreographies. The actors have no muscles to wield the swords and it shows. Also, for some reason, they can't act on green screen sets. It feels extremely unnatural.

Strangely, heavy hitters like Brosnnan, Thurman and Sean Bean are in this movie. I'm guessing they were in it for one last juicy pay check as the plot doesn't justify their contribution. Their talents are absolutely wasted. Finally, it is nice to see the consistency of Daddario. She couldn't act then, she can't act now. She is simply in the movie for eye candy.

Stowaway (I) (2021)

Enjoyable if you switch off your brain

[4/10 · 13 May 2021]

As the tag line reads, the movie is about an accidental stowaway person on a 2-year long Mars mission. Right off the beginning, like literally within 15 minutes, you encounter completely illogical decisions one after the other. I understand the producers of the movie are German and I don't think that they received proper consultancy., with Germany not having a space program and all In order to enjoy the story, you need switch off the logical center of your brain, especially in the 3rd act. Otherwise, anyone with an IQ over 80 would start screaming at the TV like "What the hell are you guys doing? What is wrong with you people?" I am also not sure why Kendrick decided to star in this movie. Maybe she ran out of Pitch Perfect sequels?

The Haunted Hotel (2021)

Make no misteke, there is absolutely no comedy in this!

[2/10 · 1 May 2021]

I don't know who added the "comedy" tag to this movie. I was hoping for some light hearted, low budget British quirkiness but greeted with non-sensical and might I say, badly executed, amateurish and no-fun-at-all screenplay. The stories either make no sense or so obvious that you can see what's coming from miles away. Don't pay attention to the 9/10 ratings. They are either trolls or they are rating some other movie!

Dune Drifter (2020)

Slow pacing amateurish movie with good cast members

[4/10 · 31 March 2021]

There are 2 bad decisions in this production. First, the CAPITAL "Dune" in the title. Very misleading and raises expectations unnecessarily. Second, I imagine they spent a considerable part of the budget on the poster. The quality of the movie is disproportional that of the poster. When you see the poster, you expect an A quality movie, which this definitely is not! The set pieces are extremely mediocre, especially the cockpit shots. Even home-made videos can utilize a green-screen effectively and cheaply these days. Yet in this movie, the cockpit shots are done in extreme close-up fashion. C'mon guys! The helmets are comical, they are constantly fogged up. No pilot can see anything through those in real life. The onboard screens and related CGI is straight from an 80's movie, they are that bad. And finally, the screenplay is very asymmetrical. Some aspects are done well, especially after the crash but the space fights are plain comical. When a craft is hit, we hear the pilots screaming for a VERY long time, with no apparent reason. At first I thought that they were hit by some kind of bio-weapon. Then I thought they were on fire but that wasn't the case either.

Having said that, the acting is quite decent. The lead females were pretty good, not so much for the supporting roles but those guys/gals were probably taken straight from community theaters anyway. Overall, the final product could have been much better if a competent screenwriter had been hired for the job.

New Girl (2011–2018)

Solid time-waster

[7/10 · 23 February 2021]

This is a good show if you want an above average sitcom. The characters are mostly nice yet there are too many of them. "The Coach" gets dumped after the Pilot episode, only to be picked up in Season 2. Winston is mostly a space-filler and the writers have no idea what to do with him, hence his plot goes wherever the wind blows. Jess and Nick have no chemistry but their interactions are watchable. Nick is acting drunk in half the series, don't know why. Probably the writers thought this was funny? The character and story of Jess never moves anywhere. Deschanel must be thinking, "I am the producer of the show, I don't need to do anymore". 80% of the time she is obnoxious as F! And why is she constantly singing? Does she think she has a good voice or something? Well, she doesn't. Overall, the show is watchable thanks to support actors and actresses (Schmidt and Cece mostly). You can give it a chance if you want non over-the-top Hollywood comedy series with half-a-decent budget and story line.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Feels like the producers gave up half way through

[3/10 · 4 February 2021]

Based on the initial reviews, I knew this was a bad sequel but didn't expect the movie to be half-baked. It feels like the script writer had a stroke in the middle of writing as some aspects of the story were good and in the next scene, it makes no sense what-so-ever. Even the special effects seem to be not finished. The end fight looks like a pre-rendered scene, the mall fight like a B-rated action movie and the cuts and edits feel like they were trying to save the movie budget by not showing CGI effects. Kristen Wiig is a terrible choice for her role, she should stuck at roles like Ghostbusters. The only good part is Gal Gadot but the director pushed her into scenes where her acting skill is overwhelmed. She is cute, has a natural charm but don't expect her to deliver complex and deep emotions. She is no Charlize Theron.

Intelligence (2020–2023)

Schwimmer alone can't lift it

[5/10 · 25 October 2020]

This one doesn't deserve a 1/10 for sure but there really isn't much going for it either. The script is quite lazy and predictable, most jokes are mediocre at best. It only has the Schwimmer sweetining about it. Not sure why he agreed to star in this series either, to be honest. Maybe bored out of doing other stuff? Anyhow, "Intelligence" can be recommended if you run out of high quality comedy series and look for something to watch.

Jack Ryan (2018–2023)

Above average spy show

[5/10 · 18 September 2020]

Don't know why Tom Clancy is involved in this project but it seems he lost his touch at the end of the first season. The story and story telling takes a nose dive after the first season. Many of the story lines of the first season gets dumped without any explanation, the character of the protoganist gets a complete make-over, Gone is the timid and shell-shocked analyst, replaced by a James Bond type uber-spy. In my view, one of the reason why season 2 is such a mess is hidden in the credits. I noticed that this show has the most number of Executive Producers of any production I watched recently. Page after page you see the names of Executive Producers. No wonder they can't agree how this story should be formed and concluded. I was seriously hoping that with the "Tom Clancy" name, this show could be a replacement for 'Homeland' but no, B- for trying.

Danger Close (2019)

Mediocre war/action movie

[6/10 · 6 August 2020]

Not sure why this movie is rated so high by some viewers. Maybe all Auzzies joined forces to up the score? Who knows... Anyhow, the movie is a decent Vietnam war movie with a twist, looking into the issue with Australian eyes. Yet I was excepting some deep, conflicting discussions among the soldiers and top-brass to dissect the issue of "what the hell are we doing here, fighting the American's war?" but it was never explored. Some good aspects: The locations and set pieces were nice. The acting is above average. It is always good to see Ragnar in a crazy person role. Unique Auzzie weapons was a nice touch. To compensate all that, some bad points: The story is unnecessary convoluted. You don't follow-up what happens where and why and who is in danger now. Pacing is also off. Dialogues are cheesy most of the time, especially between the two main characters. This movie could have been much better if the screenplay was written by a more competent writer. Such a missed opportunity.

Berlin Station (2016–2019)

One of the better espionage shows

[7/10 · 22 April 2020]

If you are a fan of espionage world, you'd like this show. It is never over the top, be it with the plots or the action sequences. Characters are not too complicated apart from Hektor, which is quite magnificent. However, you need to get through the first season, which is rough around the edges if you are used to American TV shows. The first season has a lot of German producers and it shows. The cuts and story telling reminded me of other German shows. Fortunately, this gets toned down in the second season and goes completely away in the 3rd season. The quality and cinematography is on par with the top TV shows but content-wise, it is no "Homeland". I also wished certain characters are more developed. For instance, the main antagonist's back-story is only mentioned in the 3rd season, which is weird at the very least. I occasionally get the feeling "why is this guy in the posters?".

Stargate Origins (2018)

Feels like a colleague dissertation project

[2/10 · 18 January 2019]

Salty acting apart from the lead actress, bad CGI that even makes the 15 year old Stargate episodes look good, non-existing storyline and 10 minute episodes. How come the studio allowed the Stargate name associated with this pile of excrement is a mystery to me. Shame that Connor Trinneer is tricked to take part of this, such a fall from Star Trek: Enterprise and Stargate Atlantis. Must have hurt a lot...

Celal and Ceren (2013)

This movie makes Ben Stiller movies a sight for sore eyes

[1/10 · 31 January 2013]

The movie tells the story of an ugly, chubby womanizer tricking a lovely girl to marry him. Half the movie is a cheap rip-off of the Hangover, the remaining half makes cheesy Hollywood comedies a sight for sore eyes. If you are not from Turkey, you might think "spitting" is a very fun act in Turkish culture because in the movie, the main lead actor spits at every opportunity. The producer must think that this would please the audience. On top of that, Mr. Gokbakar, can not act in scenes where he must be upset and angry. Without the makeup of the previous movies (namely Recep Ivedik series), it is obvious that emotionally difficult scenes is not really his cup of tea.

Overall, this movie is just a waste of time. Not even worth of renting or streaming. Hell, I wouldn't even recommend it to a pirate for downloading :)