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Reviews
The Babymakers (2012)
Funny late-nite comedy - perfect for netflix
my expectations for the straight-to-DVD/netflix comedies are typically pretty low. While I think Chandrekasar is a funny director, i don't love all the broken lizard stuff.
all that said, this was a fun "let's give it a shot"-type late nite comedy that was well done. nothing that hasn't been done before, per se, as there was a simpsons episode recently about reclaiming sperm and the idea of rushing back to a sperm bank with the load in a container has been done various times. Still, it has its bro-mance and its romance and its foul-mouthed hot chicks and its ridiculous premise that snowballs and if you're in your early 30s or you're married, you should be able to relate to some of the pressures of conception they tackle early on.
There's a lot of sex & masturbation scenes, but then again if you watched "american pie" or "something about mary" with other people, then this one shouldn't phase you -- you'll likely be in your living room though, so be prepared for someone to pretend like they are uncomfortable.
Watched this on New Year's 2013 and it was a great way to start it off.
Sacrifice (2011)
It's a funny thing about Netflix
Hi. I like a good crime-thriller as much as the next guy and always like my vengeance served cold. Cuba, Slater -- interesting team-up and there's another movie they did together I'd check out. They are not the problem here. Kim Coates I know from "SOA" and swore I thought that was the name of a SI Swimsuit Model from the 90s. I'll even overlook his almost-good performance.
The major problem is every other male in the film. EVERY OTHER MALE. From the teenage drug turncoat, to Coates' char.'s son (especially him) to Cuba's partner -- all were miscast. Their voices were not masculine at all. They didn't have great lines to start, so they were already at a disadvantage, but it sounded like they'd all been kicked in the genitals right before the director yelled "action!" Hey, I get it, b/c I'd be slightly intimidated calling Cuba a "dumb n-word cop" or having to fake-kick some scrappy 16 year old and telling him to "get up, f-word that rhymes with 'maggot.'" But the actual, sounds of their voices lacked any confidence or the reassurance that gravity had worked its magic on their testicles.
Beyond that -- here's some tips. If a thug punches a cop, and then shoots at other cops in a sporting arena, I seriously doubt one of the cops being shot at would tell his partner that "he can't hit (the shooter)" in the middle of a hostage crisis. Really? I'm supposed to believe that a cop's partner would try to dissuade him from punching out a shooter? That was the opening sequence.
re: Dialogue -- this goes out to all movie makers -- if one more pretend-priest mutters the words "The Lord works in mysterious ways" and is not immediately hit with a pie, I will demand a refund. I felt bad for Slater, who had to utter that actual cliché (and a couple of others) in a film he and Cuba and Agent Perez from "Saw 4" could've elevated from a C to a B-.
Oh, and actress who played Jade, you stunk. Your delivery was awful. Those were supposed to be fake drugs you were dealing and using, but I guess they call it method acting for a reason.
The whole movie didn't stink, but most of it did. Cuba does his best with what he's got. Slater -- eh, not great. I can't help but feel that Michael Madsen was missing from the picture. Fine actor, also. Probably could've played Coates' role a bit better.
Saw this on an instant streaming service with an instantly identifiable shade of red, so my expectations were lowered but I'm still underwhelmed. Want to see a good streaming flick? See Madsen's "The Killing Jar." That's doing a lot with a little. But skip "Being Michael Madsen" and "Road of No Return."
Super Troopers (2001)
not funny, not good
i just didn't like this one at all ... my brother talked it up for over a year boasting how great it was the funniest movie second only to spaceballs and i finally gave in. I laughed once, with the softball gag, and after a half hour it was as torturous as a queer eye marathon.
you guys will talk up about how funny parts are, but parts don't make up a comedy, take a look at goldmember. The there's the idea of "having to see it twice to really like it" -- but if i didn't like it the first time, why would i sit thru it again?
I can see why Old School has such a following, even though I had to force laughter at that one, but i can't understand why super troopers is so well received.
reno 911 succeeds where super troopers fails.