ebamovies Reviews

The Matrix Resurrections (I) (2021)

Almost a copypaste job by a half-Wachowski.

[6/10 · 26 December 2021]

First 20 minutes: Why is this movie bashing its original and sequels under the guise of a game? Its trying to be charicature that it didnt have to be. Its pointing out things that made people think about our existence in a Descartian way...but mashes it all in "game idea pitch meeting sessions".

First 1.30 minutes: Basically its a copy of the 1st half of the 1st movie, but muuuuuuuch slower. If the 1st one had a quick and dirty explanation and an action scene, this one needed a narration for every scene.

Last part of the movie: Sequels were useless, everything that Neo did is undone. There is a new Matrix boss and everything is bad.

I just couldnt stand it anymore. Morpheus!!???Why did he have to be a comedic relief? Terrible direction of this great stoic of a character is now shown as someone who is drinking martini and doing KungFu right after. Its terrible..and a sad. Sad and unnecessary Rebouquel that was seen coming. Especially after watching the rest of Wachowskis' movies since the original Matrix.

You Were Never Really Here (2017)

Artsy and boring version of Taken??

[3/10 · 27 January 2020]

Here is a movie idea: Someone is thinking of making a tea- show this for 3 minutes with extravagant shots of surrealist cinematography Person decides to make the tea and starts making it. : close up of the kettle and the smoke. He stirs the tea gently but with full of thoughts and contemplation of life that him stirring this tea is just like life stirring him around and round. Close up of everything. Maybe a shot of totally random guy walking the street. Mailman. Dead bird.

And then a simple story of something totally irrelevant....do I get a mention at the Sundance or Cannes because I used close up shots and I make a movie that is not a blockbuster????

Whoever praised this movie and brought it to 6.8 obviously have done so just to make sure that it's level with marvel and Disney films. This is a boring take of a life that is a vigilante. And we don't get to watch him do his best work. We don't get to hear him talk that much. We don't even really understand what happened. But it happens with very looooooong shots of one thing...literally one thing every 5 minutes. The movie is 100 minutes and first 30 of it we just don't get is he suicidal or sick or both?

It's the prequel to Joker of 2019 that nobody asked for. If Terrence Malick(close enough) and Terry Gilliam(close enough) made a love child director, that director hired an assistant to take notes and then that assistant lost those notes. Someone found those notes and decided to be a director. She used the notes for papier-mâché without reading them. That person directed this project. This is what I think of this movie and the director of it.

Suicide Squad (2016)

Would have worked better as a Sequel...Maybe to a standalone Batman film

[6/10 · 10 August 2016]

First I want to start by asking why did Ayer have a small moment of appreciation for Snyder, by having a giant smily face for 2 secs...Thanks for reminding us that Snyder still has DC Comic movies by the "balls"... The good parts : Harley: overall justice has been done to the character by the actress Katana: Interesting addition and well played ElDiablo: I always enjoy watching Jay H. as he is a pretty good actor. The OK parts: Joker:Comparing any Jokers or "J"s to Ledgers is not fun anymore, as nobody will bring the same level of intensity and non-chalant-ness to CHAOS as he did. But Leto's J is interesting, different and weird in a comic way. I didn't get much violence out of him except that he robs and shoots...but jumping into Acid.....again...if this was a Batman film where we see that J is super in love with Harley...we would appreciate Leto's sadness and overall depressive state in this movie more..than we did... THE BAD::::: Why open with 2 main characters, then give us the credits and then tell us the story....only to then go back and tell us more about the other Squad members? So if Enchantress was so bad and evil and pretty powerful...why just have her hang around as a human...And if June Moone(seriously??) hates being Ench. so much...how can she wake up one moment and want to say it...? Ench. could leave the room and go to Iran...but she couldn't leave the room and go to Amanda to pick her "heart" up... And her brother seems pretty cool too...wouldn't you want to warn everyone involved to watch out for scary brothers...and probably not keep his doll in a small room hanging out on his own... This is one of the few movies that reveal the villain in the 1st 10 minutes of the film. OK ...with Fant4, we all know that Doom is coming... And this film is the 2nd most recent superhero movie that cheats the fans by picking a villain from the list of already present people. Last one was Avengers and made Loki the bad guy... Will Smith: He still acts like a stick and has either very emotional moments with watering eyes...or dumb way of delivering the already bad Dr.Phil jokes.. Who shot at the helicopter that brought them down into the city... Why bring slingshot only to get rid of him after 5 minutes? The first part of the movie is about MetaHumans...but Harley, DShot,Boomer and sling are not meta...just human... Ench. EVIL DANCE during the whole last scene...why did she look like she needed to PEE? And yes...going back to the start..This movie would have worked better and make so much more sense if it were a sequel to a Batman movie...or SSquad 1....Instead of watching rushed flashbacks, rushed action scenes and no real set up as the set up was already ruined by ComicCon trailer...Perhaps David Ayers talent was shown in the my favorite part of the film...ElDiablo.. as Ayer is best at capturing the ghetto and gangster characters in all of his films...he did it again here...but the rest of the film...not so much.

10 Cloverfield Lane (2016)

Beyond a sequel...and just entertaining

[8/10 · 29 March 2016]

No spoilers...don't worry. After watching Cloverfield, I first hated the shaky cam on purpose idea, but the theme of the movie got me. Then I watched Super8, which made me realize that JJ is actually a good storyteller. By not showing what is scary, he lets his actors and the story make people enjoy the film without demanding a monster after 10 minutes. Force Awakens was pretty much an ALL YOU CAN EAT Buffet of stories in movie world, so don't judge him for not being more original in that one.

10 Clov. Lane had enough of everything to give you a grin due Goodman's awesome acting, an eyebrow raise to the OOH Shoot moment and enough edge to expect more. Some people will probably say that WTF does this story have anything to do with the 1st. Hence my title, it is not just a sequel, nor a prequel. You can watch both in any order and you will enjoy both, in my opinion. 1 point to fix would be Emmet's character and perhaps the actor's take on it. He is first portrayed as someone dumb whitted, not knowing the difference between North and South Korea, but then later on figuring some stuff out and actually being smarter than he seemed. But it wasn't that kind of a movie to have a character that either A: develops into a smart young man or B: is secretive about who he really is. So the writers should have just have him stick with one side. The 2 leads were awesome, I really enjoyed the attention to detail in directing. After watching BatmanVsSouperman and just being tired of watching something that should have been better foreshadowed for 3 hours, this film uses almost every shot to it's benefit in the future. And one thing I can spoil you with is this : I hope and I think there will be a sequel. There has to be....you will see

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

WHY?Simply WHY sums up my view of this movie...

[6/10 · 26 March 2016]

There are so many open ended questions after watching this film, that I chose to ask only a few. Why did the studio gave a movie about giants of superhero world to Mr. Green room? Was it really because he would save costs by shooting the film in green room? Why is everyone in love with Frank Miller and his adaptations of comic books?Is it because he is the hip guy now?I am not a fan of Sin City, didn't watch the 2nd one and we all know what happened when they let Frank direct a movie of his own. Why is Lex Luthor trying to kill Sman?What was the point of having Bman and SMan fight?Why did it have to be Ben Affleck?Even Matt Damon would have been a better choice. Why is the movie so dark hued? Not the theme, but the coloring of the whole movie?Snyder did in 300, Watchmen and MofSteel...I guess people enjoy that...right?Louis Lane literally can't move around without Sman saving her...She even realized that herself finally.WHY?Why does Bman have not 1 but 2 dream sequences?Why did Snyder literally took Nolan's WHERE IS SHE and re-used it in this film?Why is Bman tattooing everyone...is that suppose to be Snyder's I AM BATMAN equivalent?Why is the whole America complaining about Sman destroying the city, many many times, if at the end they literally shoot a nuclear weapon, decided within a matter of seconds?Why are all reviews raving about WonderWoman...She only has maybe 6 minutes of screen time, and most of it is about ATMing, crashing parties, steeling stuff and walking away. Why does walk away from stuff so much?Why is Louis Lane's boss such a wussy...She wants something,1st is no..then it's YES...every time. Then why is he so hard on Kent for trying to uncover Bman? Why is Bman swearing so much?Why is Bman shooting guns?Wouldn't we just watch a Affleck movie without a costume where he shoots bad guys?And Why NOT let Affleck direct? He is a better director than he is an actor, let's be honest! Why ...WHY let Snyder become the Jos Whedon of the DC comics , allowing him to move on to Justice League movies?How did LouisLane know that the spear would kill the Doomsday, alone on that pier?HOW did Bman get his hands on the ROCK, after Sman stopped his car during that mess of a truck chase?When I saw the trailer, I couldn't believe they let Irons say that stupid line of.. POWERLESS...NESS...or the Affleck's DO YOU BLEED?...YOU WILL?...Sman didn't even hear that part. Like I said...lot of open ended questions and I think Snyder just ruined my favorite superhero adaptations forever(Batman..not Sman)

Furious 7 (2015)

The good...the bad....the end.???

[6/10 · 18 April 2015]

Dear movie fans...I base this review strictly on my opinion without agreeing or disagreeing with anyone on IMDb or around the world....

The BAD: Directing....No racism involved, but why in the world did they switch an Asian director with another Asian director? Was there a point in this? After watching this movie I am convinced that McG or Peter Berg would do a much better job. By the end of the whole thing I felt I like was watching a Zack Snyder movie. Not because of excellent CGI skills with Paul Walker's double (not that Zack's CGI skills are excellent) but because it felt more like Man of Steel than Furious franchise topper. OR even worse...Avengers...seriously the whole LA gets destroyed like NY was in Avengers 1st one....WHY...HOW...WHY every place Shaw shows up gets blown up...WHY....whats the point?

Script: Who ...seriously who wrote this script? A 6 year old...I mean beside the fact that none of the actors knew how to deliver a punch line when it was suppose to be brought...why were the dialogues so played out and just stupid....

Acting: First, not every wrestler/fighter is a good actor. Rock and John Cena are exceptions to the rule. I still think Be Cool was Rock's best role. Why did they have that female MMA fighter in that role, say a few words and then not deliver an end to her character...she gets knocked out by a fall and thats it...she is gone. If you were to bring someone famous to a role...finish the role properly..or just bring someone who can ACT. Second, after this movie I am also convinced that Vin Diesel should be our next Batman. I mean any deeper voice and nobody can understand him. Third Tyrese and Luda are just bad....come on..Can I check my email??? Really that was suppose to be funny...nope ...dead line like every line they both brought. And back to Hobbs...whats with the REDNECK remarks?

Story: God's eye? The best name they came up with? Eagle Eye didn't come up as a film where an almost similar technology was used so obvious movie fans would call this a copy of that idea in that film. So Shaw hunts them...even though he had a USB with all of them he technically only took one out in Japan the rest just followed Dom...Then they loose Shaw and really cannot locate him until this Mr.Nobody shows up to help them find him...but they don't really need to do all of this dangerous work since Shaw shows up everywhere anyways...Besides the question of HOW does he show up everywhere, why do they need this EYE thing if Shaw is going to come anyways. Mr. Nobody winking and almost dying...then only get rescued in a second and be OK....Then say goodbye and we never know what happened to him?Thank you. How did Letti know that Brian is running on the bus to jump?WHY does Hobbs have a daughter? And how is this important to the whole story? Race world , we started it? Really when? Looked more like Nitro circus episode. Wouldn't it just be really much better to make this a one by one death story. Shaw finds them and takes them out until he reaches Brian and Dom. Dom lets Brian live to have one last fight with Shaw. Kicks his ass, Hobbs catches him end of story. Brian lives forever in our hearts while we never have to see Tyrese and Luda ever again in this franchise if it ever were to come back. I remember everything...2 minute BS , flashbacks....then again??? I remember everything...wow...what an end...Abu Dhabi? Why not Dubai? Abu Dhabi is what Ottawa is to Canada ...nice to visit but boring and too political...And why show us the dunes and stuff....we know where Middle East is...we know it's full of sand...again instead of dunes show us some races...Racing movie remember?... THE GOOD: Tony JAA: Old but still awesome. Excellent work on Paul Walker's face. The BEST for last...: The last 1 minute monologue by Diesel and moment of Paul Walker. Very touching and full of that Paul Walker grace that we will miss...

I really hope they don't come back and if they do, please bring a director who was not only known for his scary movies, good scary movies too and somehow switched from tortures and ghosts to...cars and action...

The Interview (II) (2014)

The trailer of this movie is much funnier than the whole film

[2/10 · 28 December 2014]

First of all, I would like to start by saying SHAME ON YOU, to those 23K people who had this movie up with 9.9 rating a week ago. Now I can write my review, it may or may not contain spoilers..depending whether would you rather be prepared for this movie or just be amazed on how bad it was yourself. I was hoping that Sony and the US were in on all of this publicity stunt and this movie was so good that they did all of this to make sure people watch it...and I did. If I have to compare this movie, I can compare it to SBCohen's Dictator, which had it's own share of racist and anti-semitic jokes, but still managed to give me a giggle or even a huge 2 minute laugh during the helicopter scene. The Interview will let you in on a huge secret the Hollywood has been hiding for years right in front of our eyes. James Franco CAN'T act..no seriously, this Oscar nominated pretentious , one smile for every emotion clown and this "director" with 0 depth...can not act. Some of you will be fooled that he is over-acting on purpose...like Tom Hanks in Ladykillers, or Heath Ledger in Dark Knight or Will Ferrell in everything..but no ...This is James Franco at his best. Seth Rogen is the guy that started all of this Apatow style comedy from 40YOV..the crazy laugh, the better side of the comedy in this particular case. The first 30 minutes of this movie are just flat, no joke works, nothing can really bring IT. As you indulge yourself into this Anti-NKorean story..you can feel that many of the scenes are improvised, almost as if these 2 best friends from 15 years ago were given a lot of money and they decided to act and joke like they wish and not really care that there will be millions of people watching and paying to see them. It was funny in Pineapple Express, it was still funny thanks to Danny Mcbride in This is the End, but this movie will finally let you see that the "APATOW bunch" literally is made of untalented young men that use popularity as talent and make money, if separated they all are out of their depth and can not act for s*it. Only when they are together they hide each others empty delivery and make it up with a better come back on what the other one said. My last 2 cents...First, how in the world James Franco got an Oscar nomination and how Jonah Hill keeps getting nominated I don't understand...Second...either NKorea is right and this is a HUGE US PATRIOTic stunt and this movie is funded by the president...or was this idea submitted and approved during Sony's "how to save WiiU sales" week and they said YES to everything. I am not Korean and I still found it a little weird that actual country and that actual county's president's name, likeness and family history were used without even having small "all events in this film are fiction" statement...So don't go to the cinema to watch it, don't even watch the whole thing, as my subject says...the trailer of this film is way funnier than the whole thing.