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Jake Squared (2013)
Review: 'Jake Squared', Starring Elias Koteas
There are so many films that come out during the year, and generally, they're all decent enough to sit through. Watching Jake Squared might honestly give you the biggest WTF moment of your life because I'm convinced that even the director couldn't figure out what kind of movie he was trying to make. There are unfortunately not enough words in the English dictionary to describe how awful this film truly is.
Jake Klein (Elias Koteas) is making a movie. He hires Mike Vogel to play him, then decides to throw a party that includes hot tubs and stereotypical ditzy girls in bikinis just because he can. Why is Jake making this movie? Well, your guess is as good as mine because it's never made clear why Jake is really doing anything. The movie begins to get confusing about a few minutes in when several Jakes, not Mike Vogel's portrayal of him, come crashing into his party and disrupting every aspect of his life and movie.
There's Jake at 17 (Kevin Railsback), Jake at 30, and Jake at 40, and of course the present Jake at 50. If this isn't confusing enough (and director Howard Goldberg should really rethink the title), all this is happening in real time. No, it's not a hallucination, a dream, or any kind of mental disease. It seems all these different versions of Jake have come to crash the party to ultimately give him love advice on which girl he should have chosen and possibly bring him happiness.
Nothing in the last sentence doesn't happen until the last ten minutes of the film and we spend so little time with his exes (Jane Seymour and Susan Traylor) and current possible love interests (Virginia Madsen and Jennifer Jason Leigh) that the whole story seems contrived, uninspiring, self-indulgent, boring, confusing, and every other horrifying adjective you can think of to fill in the blank.
So disturbingly awful is this film, that Virginia Madsen, after about ten to fifteen or so minutes into the film, has to explain everything that happens in the beginning. At that point, we don't know who she is, how she fits into the story, or anything about her. But the fact that the movie literally stops to give us a recap of what came before is truly astonishing, proves that this film is awfully confusing, and discredits and insults itself all in one scene.
Also, instead of an actually well-written script, Goldberg relies heavily on quotes from different people that get tossed around by the characters in conversation. This lazy writing technique replaces actual dialogue and character interaction, which is pretty much nonexistent to begin with. Everything is a jumbled mess, like the movie is stuck in a maze and keeps getting lost along the way to the end. It tangles itself up so much in the beginning that it becomes incoherent, random stacked on top of random.
Jake Squared is one of those films you will be glad you never watched. It's a sham and awful filmmaking at its best. The movie goes from bad to worse the longer it goes on and completely wastes some of its cast, while others are terrible in their roles. It's a headache-inducing nuisance that will leave a bad taste in your mouth. The characters and their terrible conversations, or lack thereof, are contrived and Goldberg doesn't really bother to make sense of any of it. One of the worst films of the year.
Hank and Asha (2013)
Review: 'Hank and Asha', Starring Mahira Kakkar and Elias Koteas
This year's romantic comedies have nothing on Hank and Asha. The film gives us a new take on a topic that's been attempted several times before: long-distance relationships. The film is genuinely funny, doesn't try too hard, and isn't fantastical with its topic. First-time director James E. Duff gets it right in an age where long-distance and online relationships are all the rage in a highly connected world.
Asha (Mahira Kakkar) is an Indian girl studying film abroad in Prague. At a film festival, she sees a documentary that moves her and is disappointed when the director of the film, Hank (Andrew Pastides), isn't there to talk about it. In order to ask a question about the inspiring film, Asha tracks down his information and sends him a video message.
Hank is living in New York and responds in kind. Through video messages, they begin a heartfelt relationship that connects them to each other though they never meet face-to-face.
They're both lonely and disconnected from the physical world, but come to learn a lot about each other through questions and funny messages they leave for each other. Certain complications arise that throw a wrench in their relationship and force them to look at things a little more realistically.
This film is by far one of the most heartfelt films of the year. It's cute and funny, warm and sad. The performances, though the two actors are never in the same scene, are fantastic and extremely layered. You'll feel almost as if you were receiving messages from a friend abroad. The movie breaks racial barriers too and doesn't focus on the fact that it's doing so, which is a refreshing break from the films that make you hyper-aware of it.
The film is shot entirely through video messages between the characters. In this aspect, it's very original. We get to see two different worlds entirely through messages left in different time zones. The movie explores the loneliness of living in a new place and the struggles of maintaining human contact through online means. Through each other they learn and experience new things. Hank and Asha get to know each other better than some people do in the real world and that is one of the film's strengths.
Mahira Kakkar as Asha is the perfect choice. She's cute and awkwardly funny in a way that's entirely real. Besides being funny, Kakkar brings warmth to her scenes and can make you laugh and extremely sad depending on what the situation calls for. She'll have you rooting for Kakkar. And funny as it is to say, seeing as how the leads never appear on screen together, but they have pretty great chemistry in reaction to each other's messages.
Andrew Pastides is the average guy. He's not stereotypically suave and doesn't say charming things because he has ulterior motives. He's sweet and funny. He acts like a lot of guys actually act and it comes off as very realistic and true. His frustrated ranting is both entertaining and highly saddening in context with his and Asha's relationship struggles. He and Kakkar both work so well talking to only a camera.
Hank and Asha is easily one of the best films at the Virginia Film Festival this year. It embraces the online world in a comedic fashion, but brings it back down to Earth with its poignant realism. It's heartwarming and very lovable in a way a lot of romantic comedies can only dream of being, the cast perfect, and the story almost bittersweet. It's really a story for anyone who's ever struggled to be connected to someone in a world that's highly plugged in to cyberspace, yet somehow disconnected. Sweet, fun, and realistic.
Some Velvet Morning (2013)
Review: 'Some Velvet Morning', Starring Stanley Tucci and Alice Eve
Neil LaBute is originally a playwright, and his newest film Some Velvet Morning can certainly pass as a staged play, because it's set up in a way that screams theater, yet is somehow more intriguing in movie format because the camera chooses not to show you everything, which is vital for this screenplay. LaBute is especially known for his twist endings, and this film doesn't escape this at all.
After four years apart, Fred (Stanley Tucci) comes knocking on his former mistress's door with all his belongings stuffed into suitcases, claiming that he has finally left his wife. Velvet (Alice Eve) claims she is happy to see him, but is surprised that he's come back after so long fully intending to pick up where they left off; and by the looks of his suitcases, move in.
The film is set in a New York home, and once Fred arrives at the doorstep and closes the door, the audience is trapped in the house and bound to watch the events unfold. Fred and Velvet try to work through some of the issues which plagued their relationship the first time around.
The fact that Velvet prepares to go on a lunch date with Fred's son Chris further complicates matters. As the story unfolds, we find out how verbally abusive and controlling their relationship really is, Fred seeming to hold all the cards in his hand and Velvet adhering to his words even as she pushes back verbally and emotionally.
Stanley Tucci is a man of many talents, an actor who diversifies his roles and is practically everywhere. This film shows off a great performance from him. Tucci's character seems cool and collected, but simmers with physical rage underneath a verbally abusive demeanor. One second, you think you could give this guy a chance, the next he's an asshole. Tucci plays the kind of guy who can explode at any moment, never knowing what might set him off.
Alice Eve plays Velvet with an undercurrent of fear towards Tucci's Fred, but she's also boiling with repressed anger, though much quieter and reserved. And when she bursts out with her explanation about why she broke it off with Fred, you begin to see through what she does and their almost uncomfortable and verbally controlling and manipulative relationship. Eve isn't as well known as Tucci yet, her biggest role to date being in Star Trek Into Darkness, but she proves here that she can help carry a movie and do it with grace.
LaBute is a master at bringing us one story and then turning it around and pulling the rug out from under us. Anything said further about the matter would qualify as a spoiler and ruin the layout of the entire film.
The movie is set up like a play, but uses certain camera angles and shots to its advantage. At first, it's not clear where the film is going. The conversations between the characters build on each other and become more layered and interesting as the film goes on.
Some Velvet Morning is the type of film you'll see and immediately want to discuss afterwards. It throws out several implications about the two characters that will have your head spinning by the end. Everything that is said and done is called into question by the time the credits roll and you may be trying to process it all days later. The script is smart and controlled as the setting never changes and the focus is only on the two characters and their tumultuous relationship. LaBute brings us a film that plays head games with the audience with every word spoken. Highly intriguing and verbally thrilling.
Child of God (2013)
Review: 'Child of God', Starring Scott Haze
It's a surprise to some that James Franco has carved a little corner for himself in the Hollywood scene, much less capable of directing films. Child of God isn't his first foray in the director's chair, but it is most certainly one of his more intriguingly creepier films, mostly thanks to the source material by Cormac McCarthy. While the movie might not appeal to a larger audience, there's no doubt that the its lead actor Scott Haze will be getting praise for his fantastic performance as the grizzly and socially inept lead character.
Lester Ballard (Scott Haze) has no home, family, or friends to speak of. He's been abandoned by everything humans essentially need to keep going and is living outside the social order. Ballard is uneducated, can barely speak in complete and understandable sentences, and lives in the woods outside of town. Mostly, he keeps to himself, save for the times he gets arrested by the town's police for disturbing the peace or some other minor incident.
Alone and away from any form of human contact, Ballard happens across a car one night where a young couple has stopped to have sex where there are no interruptions. Ballard leaves and comes across the car again a few hours later only to find the car still running and the couple dead. Never having any human contact, Ballard has sex with the dead girl and then drags her back to his cabin, makes sure she's comfortable, and then later goes shopping to find her a pretty dress to wear. Creeped out yet? Because it gets weirder.
Up to this point, though Ballard's actions are extremely disturbing, he doesn't harm anybody living and keeps mostly to himself. But one night, he wakes up in the middle of the night to a fire in his cabin. He manages to get out and tries to rescue his very dead girlfriend, but she gets burned up and essentially dies a second time. The loss of his only human contact drives Ballard over the edge and turns him into something even more disturbing: a cave-dwelling, psychopath and murderous necrophiliac.
The subject matter can get extremely uncomfortable and disturbing at several points in the film. Cormac McCarthy's work is always difficult to bring to the screen and it's noticeable throughout the first half of the movie. The film is split into three acts, with some narration included in the first act as background information.
The rest of this review will be praise for Scott Haze's portrayal of Lester Ballard. Haze went into isolation for three months for this role and claims it changed his life. He pulls out all the stops and is practically unrecognizable while on screen. Haze does some pretty disgusting things, and his performance is downright disturbing, creepy, and shudder-inducing. The actor outshines the rest of the film, especially in the final half of the film and whether or not you'll find the movie enjoyable, Haze gives one of the best performances of the year. He's fantastic and his work in this film deserves an award.
The novel by Cormac McCarthy is dense and often hard to interpret, as is the film adaptation. Child of God is a mediocre attempt to bring McCarthy's disturbed character to life. The material is uncomfortable and more creepy than a lot of things you'll see in theaters this year. If you're incensed really easily, then this may not be for you, but it's ultimately worth watching for Scott Haze's performance alone.
The Necessary Death of Charlie Countryman (2013)
Review: 'Charlie Countryman', Starring Shia LaBeouf and Evan Rachel Wood
Fredrik Bond is most well known for shooting car commericals, and in his feature film debut, you can most definitely tell. Charlie Countryman has fast-paced action, a romantic story fit for a dramatic music video, and fantastic performances. Sometimes, it does feel like watching a very long full-throttle car commercial in the way certain scenes are executed, but Bond does a decent job trying to balance a tale of love filled with violent repercussions.
Charlie Countryman (Shia LaBeouf) has just lost his mother and he quickly runs to take her up on her final advice to visit Bucarest, Romania. Lost and probably feeling like a fish out of water, he heads to Bucarest, not really knowing what he's going to do there, but needing to have a destination. On the plane ride there, he meets a man named Victor Ibanescu (Ion Caramitru), who's on his way back from watching the Cubs play. Because Charlie apparently has the worst luck in the world, Victor dies before landing, but not before making Charlie promise to give a souvenir hat to his daughter Gabi (Evan Rachel Wood).
Charlie fulfills his promise and ends up getting romantically entangled with the mysterious cello player who's ex-husband Nigel (Mads Mikkelsen)--though he insists they're still married--is more than he seems. Meanwhile, Charlie takes up residence at a youth hostel where he meets Luc (James Buckley) and Karl (Rupert Grint) and their crazy late- night shenanigans leads them to learn just who Nigel really is and how he runs things in his town.
The movie is most definitely a different kind of love story. Not one that hasn't been done before, but one that's bold in a way that's fresh and strangely exciting. It certainly keeps you in your seat the entire time, slow motion excitement and suspense building up to an adrenaline- fueled finale. Bond knows how to get people's adrenaline going and he certainly puts that aspect of the film ahead of a lot of other story points.
A lot of people doubt Shia LaBeouf's abilities as an actor, but he gives so much to this role and the final product is fantastic. He has some very intense scenes that range from the dramatic to the lightly humorous. From accidentally getting high on ecstasy to evading hired goons, LaBeouf's portrayal of Charlie is one of his best performances to date.
Evan Rachel Wood isn't Romanian, but if you didn't know any better, you'd think she is. We meet her character just as she's been struck by tragedy and innately know it doesn't end there. Wood's performance is pretty good, her chemistry with LaBeouf undeniable as her eyes maintain the haunted look of a woman stuck in a situation she tries to avoid.
James Buckley and Rupert Grint provide great comedic relief for the film and perfect victims, though it would have been nice to see more from their characters rather than being used mainly for laughs. Mads Mikkelsen is creepy and lethal in his role as Nigel. His presence is intense and his deadly calm is terrifying.
There are a lot of things that work in the film, one of them being the natural progression of its controlled, yet violent nature. There's no doubt that the stakes are explained and not contrived, and that feels like a breath of fresh air. Bond falters a little bit when trying to flesh out the love story and its progression. It all seems to happen too fast and might have been better if more time had passed between Gabi and Charlie's meeting and the events in the finale. There are some scenes that fall a little flat in the scheme of things, but Bond works to rectify it all so that by the time the credits roll, the film feels a little more solid than it had been earlier.
All in all, Charlie Countryman is a generally solid effort by Fredrik Bond. There are some scenes that pull you into the action and are so high energy that it's obvious what Bond's job description entailed before taking on this film. The performances are top notch from everyone, but LaBeouf most definitely stands out above the rest. Bond's feature film debut is an action-packed adrenaline rush.
Nebraska (2013)
Review: 'Nebraska', Starring Will Forte and Bruce Dern
Anyone who's seen Will Forte's work knows that he's best known for doing comedy. He's been on Saturday Night Live and starred alongside comedy gurus like Adam Sandler and Ben Stiller. So it might be surprising that Forte appears in Alexander Payne's Nebraska, but Forte actually does a pretty good job with the drama in the film. It also helps that the film isn't too depressing and has a lot of lighthearted moments.
Woody Grant (Bruce Dern) believes he's won a million dollars. It's one of those sweepstakes we all have gotten in the mail at some point or other and thrown away because they're scams. Well, according to Woody's family, he tends to believe everything that people tell him, and so everyday he takes his winning paper and starts walking to Nebraska from Billings, Montana in an attempt to get his money.
David (Will Forte), Woody's son, finally humors his dad and packs their bags so that they can make the two-day trip to Nebraska in order for Woody to get what he wants and stop driving people crazy trying to walk there.
On the way to their destination, the two stop for the weekend at David's uncle's house in Hawthorne. While there, David begins to learn things about his dad that he never knew before from the mouths of family and people in the town who knew Woody when he grew up there.
In one word, Nebraska is a pretty good movie. Alexander Payne puts a lot of effort into it to make it look as natural as possible, so much so that it's shot in black and white, and it works effortlessly. The scenery, acting, and story all blend together really well and create an atmosphere of realistic sadness and humor rolled into one. It's real life and Payne paints that really well.
Comedic actors usually flow into drama pretty well given the right material, and Will Forte does it well enough. His character is kind of the crutch that holds up his father and supports him as they trek through this adventure together. Whereas Bruce Dern is the lost, constantly zoned out and slightly confused father. Dern is unkempt and hell bent on getting to Nebraska for reasons other than what you might think.
Stacy Keach plays a real asshole as Woody's old buddy who basically sold him out way back when and now wants money once he realizes that Woody will become a millionaire. He's obnoxious and the epitome of a greedy and unfair friend that it really hits home when he makes fun of Woody and Woody takes it quietly. It's a telling trait that distinguishes each of their characters.
While the entire cast is really good, it's June Squibb as David's mother Kate Grant, who really shines and steals the show. The woman is a fire cracker and really gets the laughs rolling. She has so much gumption and attitude that she just steals every scene she's in. The movie is much more vibrant with her in it.
The film has a lot of themes that keep cropping up and finally come to a head at the end. Themes about family, being taken advantage of when it comes to money, and finding out what's really important to people in life. Alexander Payne brings us a heartwarming and wonderfully told story about a father/son adventure that is layered with much more than it seems. Natural storytelling and atmosphere, Nebraska is Alexander Payne at his best.