I have never since the birth of the internet felt compelled to write a film review (if you can call this that, rather than just a moan) but in the same way in which I would feel obliged to report the existence of a freshly belly-split roadkill deer to avoid a small child from happening upon it, I feel I have a moral duty to warn people that this film lies around the corner if they are not careful to avoid it.
The acting is hopeless, which can't in the main be the actors' faults since most have given us performances in the past ranging from 'sublime' in some cases all the way down to 'much better than this' in many others. I got the feeling that Mr Depp in particular was just going through the motions, perhaps looked almost embarrassed at times (hey we've all got to pay the rent, Johnny), but even Ms Jolie and her unfeasible lips, who you'd think would be much more in their element, seemed not to find their feet. As it were.
The whole thing seemed incoherent at best, laughably bad at worst. The 'plot' is utterly ridiculous. It's not even "so bad it's good" -- it's "so bad it's really, really bad". I kept hoping it would get better, that stuff would start to happen, that we'd have a decent action scene, that I would not just be sacrificing two hours of my life to this dross, but no, none of the above.
Caution: fresh roadkill. AVOID.
The acting is hopeless, which can't in the main be the actors' faults since most have given us performances in the past ranging from 'sublime' in some cases all the way down to 'much better than this' in many others. I got the feeling that Mr Depp in particular was just going through the motions, perhaps looked almost embarrassed at times (hey we've all got to pay the rent, Johnny), but even Ms Jolie and her unfeasible lips, who you'd think would be much more in their element, seemed not to find their feet. As it were.
The whole thing seemed incoherent at best, laughably bad at worst. The 'plot' is utterly ridiculous. It's not even "so bad it's good" -- it's "so bad it's really, really bad". I kept hoping it would get better, that stuff would start to happen, that we'd have a decent action scene, that I would not just be sacrificing two hours of my life to this dross, but no, none of the above.
Caution: fresh roadkill. AVOID.
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