thekingofplain Reviews

Amityville Horror: The Evil Escapes (1989 TV Movie)

The Amityville 4 drinking game!

[4/10 · 18 July 2006]

This movie is just awful, but in a very fun way. We had a blast watching it, so watch it with a group of people and you will have a good time making fun of it. If you are looking for a drinking game, here it is...

During the movie, they make a really big deal about the haunted floor lamp lighting by itself even though it is not plugged in. It happens a lot, trust me. Here are the rules: Every time the lamp turns itself on and does the spooky glow thing, everyone in the room has to say out loud at the same time, "Oh my God, the lamp lights by itself!", and take a drink. Put some emotion into it - it's fun. You better have a designated driver if you do this... the lamp really likes to light itself up.

Have fun.

Boo (2005)

I agree with the editor

[7/10 · 14 November 2005]

After reading the comments by the editor on this film, I must wholeheartedly agree. Boo is not a perfect film, nor the best I have ever seen, but it is FAR better than any direct to video horror film I have seen. This film made me jump out of my skin several times, and it was very creepy. Yes, the plot is silly. Yes, it doesn't make a lot of sense in parts, but this is a fine offering of a horror film... and maybe I'm a toad, but I like how this film didn't feel the need to have pointless nudity and sex - it just seems to be a higher caliber DTV horror film. Everyone has their opinion, and I'm sure there are some who disagree, but I have seen a lot of horror films and I cannot see how anyone could think this to be one of the worst ever made. It is a lot of fun, so give it a chance. By the way, the editing on this film was outstanding, so cheers to the other reviewer.

Jason Goes to Hell (1993)

One of the worst films in cinema history

[1/10 · 19 April 2005]

I just watched this last night and I have to say it is worse than I remember. This is a shameful film to be included in this series. The scenes just do not make any sense. I'll admit that there are times when I just can't help myself... I have to grab a black beating heart and munch it down, but in this case, there just wasn't any motivation that I could see. Oh, wait - the evil in Jason's heart called out to the coroner... right. Strike that. This is really bad. Really. I would say that the film looks as if it was written by high schoolers, but that would be an insult. Stay far away unless you just want to watch the complete series. Some of the deaths are good, but they couldn't save the film. If you are a fan of the Evil Dead films, you will notice something interesting, but it will be the most interesting thing about the film.

You could make a better film if you strapped a rolling camera on to a wiener dog for an hour and a half.