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Reviews
Elsbeth (2024)
Misusing a word once is bad; multiple times it's toxic!
"Cancelled"?? A professor sleeping with a student would fear being FIRED. (Even though it's always been a thing, as far back as there have been young adult students and teachers because ephebophiles are drawn to colleges and/or teaching, duh.) The point is when the first two said it it was annoying. When the rest of the characters did so, it became lazy, fake-trendy writing.
Also the intelligence of the main character is great; the vocal fry (if ya wanna get linguistically trendy) is less-great.
I am also very unsure whether the return to *Columbo* format-literally watching the crime committed in the first minutes of the episode-will fly in 2024. That requires us to go all-in on the detective, as we did with the late, great Peter Falk but might not on Carrie Preston's Elsbeth...
We will give it some time. Most shows need to settle in. I think it's amusing that the other characters are not falling for her wide-eyed naif act even though they just met her, though.
Silent Witness: Cargo: Part 2 (2006)
Making Sam look better and better
I never thought I would miss Amanda Burton's character (the actress was fine; the character was insufferable), but damn if Nikki Alexander isn't making me pine for Sam. Say one thing for Sam Ryan: she loved herself far too much to be foolhardy... well, she had an idiotic tendency to assume she could talk her way out of danger with murderers, true, but she'd never be so stupid as to underestimate the deadliness of a viral hemorrhagic fever!
As for the rest of the cast, sometimes it feels (as it did with Sam) as if they're there to make the main female character seem more heroic. Which was bad enough when it was an older woman, but now a young woman is supposedly smarter, braver, and more empathetic than anyone else.
Bleah.
Silent Witness: Fatal Error: Part 1 (2003)
Leo turns into a massive jerk?
What on earth is going on with Leo and Sam? I've never much liked the superior snottiness of a perfectionist who appears to look down on literally every other character. But Leo in this episode makes Sam look like a mild, sweet, easygoing angel.
The way Leo talks to Sam is completely at odds with his over-respect for her in every episode before this one. I would only expect to see this kind of obnoxiously insulting behavior if they'd had an affair and she'd broken it off... but they didn't, as far as I know.
I see he's not leaving the show, so I'm baffled. Why would they make yet another character utterly hateful? Very strange choice. I keep crossing my fingers that Leo will be the next victim, even though I know he's not gonna anywhere.
This kind of writing is what causes me to stop watching shows.
Heartstopper: Boyfriend (2022)
So great, so uplifting... *so* should've ended here
The problem with this lovely series is basically the problem of all TV: it doesn't EVER 'leave people wanting more' (cf John Cleese when he stopped making *Fawlty Towers* at the peak of its success) anymore.
Because it is made by greedy people who will throw money at something and wring every last drop of capitalist success out of it (killing it in the process)-and because the word 'fan' comes from 'fanatic'-when something is sweet and meaningful, well-acted and well-written, directed with intelligence and restraint...
... it cannot last. Had the show ended here, it would have the highest rating I can give, and the sentiment that EVERYONE should watch it, because it's truly a window into the fact that young LGBT kids are just struggling to find themselves and their place in the world. Their activism comes out of love and acceptance (finding their own self-acceptance and wanting it for everyone).
Unfortunately, as the series keeps going into Season 2, it begins to runs out of first the restraint and then the intelligence. It tries to add flat, un-nuanced characters and gives even some recurring ones almost nothing to work with. It makes Charlie so central that it begins to feel false and myopic. The plots trickle way into soap opera territory, the melodrama saddles the entire cast with humiliating scenes (I didn't think it was supposed to make me cringe constantly), and it all feels insanely like there was nothing more to say but people loved it so let's make more.
I loved spending time in these characters' world, but all good things should know when to end. This one doesn't.
Heartstopper: Heat (2023)
Starting to tick boxes rather than be authentic
I loved this when it started, and although Im way too old to be the target demographic, as an LGBT person with an LGBT family, I see the characters, plot lines, and conflicts with both sympathy and understanding.
BUT... in the last two episodes it has gotten awfully soap-opera-y, in the worst possible sense. A melodramatic breakup by a minor character led to the revelation that Charlie's first bisexual boyfriend is still in love with him... over-the-top, but the main character is indeed lovable and kind-and so it's semi-believable.
Then we get the big reveal that Charlie is anorexic, and (while it makes psychological sense that LGBT people and previously bullied people might turn their anger inward towards themselves) now it begins to feel WORSE than a soap opera; this show is becoming a bad 'after-school special' (American garbage TV movies from the 70s and 80s that were these awful preachy extended public service announcements, which is why they were such a joke), just ticking boxes off on a list of relevant topics.
Again, however, I am not only well past this age but our LGBT kids are now young adults, so it's possible that melodrama is just no longer part of my life, so I've stopped identifying. I'm going to go yell at some kids to get off my lawn now.
Silent Witness: Tell No Tales: Part 1 (2002)
Benedict Cumberbatch!!!!
Nobody points out *anywhere* that here's a very young guy who was yet to become a mega superstar?! I'm in shock! He's not even listed on the main page as being in the episode!
Sorry this isn't about the episode or show, but come ON... it's Sherlock! It's Doctor Strange! It's freaking Benedict Cumberbatch!! I'm not a fanatical teen (way too old), but he's an amazing actor and he's incredibly famous now, so it's odd not to see him mentioned at all.
Ok, so as so many people have noted, they require a certain number of characters in order to put the 'review' out there. So here goes on the episode. Someone asked if Sam seems to be losing her sense of humor, but the prickly I-know-best attitude has been a big joke to us ever since we started watching-as is the fact that her combination of commitment phobia and know-it-all superiority has chased away every guy she dated. So for us it's right in line with her personality all along.
NCIS: Sydney (2023)
Swann has to go, then maybe it could last
I don't know who told this actress that tough means never moving your upper lip, or that sneering looks like strong emotion, but the character of Blue is so grating we called her 'worse than Abby'... and yet she's not in it as much so she can't drag down the show the way the lead actress (playing Mackey) does.
It's... just plain bad acting. The writers have described the cast/characters as 'quirky', which is often self-aggrandizement for 'I will get on your nerves'-and yes, they all have their moments of annoyance (the two younger leads who are partners should both stop calling themselves hot; it's not cute)-but again, they don't ruin the show the way a first-lead with no nuance can.
She's not good, or someone gave her bad direction. You decide.
Silent Witness: An Academic Exercise: Part 2 (1998)
Nothing 'brilliant' about this genius
Sam Ryan is constantly described as-and acts like she thinks she is-superior in intellect to everyone around her in the first few seasons. Now she's at Cambridge, surrounded by like minds (one of the students says 'we're all exceptional here'), and if anything, the people are stupider... inserting themselves into the crime when they weren't even being considered at first? That's just plain dumb.
But never fear: Sam will become dimmer to meet them at their level: from vouching for her friend the victim's violent husband to putting her fingerprints everywhere she shouldn't be to sitting with her back to a sociopath child (age 21) who's murdered two people already... the next person on this show who calls her 'smart', 'right', or anything other than 'feckless half-wit' (shades of last episode, when she made the exact same mistakes)... loses credibility.
Oh, no. That's the writers.
We're sticking with it because we have to assume from its super-long run that it gets better. But we hope it's soon! In real life this moron of a doctor' would have been murdered long ago if not in this episode!
TL;DR: The acting is fine, even fun, but the writing stretches willing suspension of disbelief too far!
Silent Witness: Only the Lonely: Part 2 (1997)
10 stars for the episode, 1 star for the closed captioning!
We are wondering if they're playing some kind of cruel joke on deaf people, given the literally atrocious transcription. Seriously, if you can't hear and one character refers to 'emails' out of the blue, wouldn't you be baffled? It should have been 'M. O.s'... which at least makes sense.
Then there are all the times they think the name Wyn is Sam saying 'when' or, the last travesty (and the one that made me write this), a police officer calling through the letter box in the door, 'do you like to sing?' (It was 'could you let us in'.)
We are just grateful we can hear and use the CCTV to supplement/compensate for the brogues of Sam and Wyn!! We would probably not know what this episode was about otherwise.
Sheila Levine Is Dead and Living in New York (1975)
The best books don't make good movies
The novel was one of the funniest, sharpest, best-written things I ever found-and I wasn't surprised when Gail Parent made a name as the creator of witty, memorable dialogue, because I had read this many years before "The Golden Girls" hit TV. And there is FANTASTIC, hilarious, brilliant dialogue in the book. Forty (or more) years later, I could probably recite some of it verbatim, I reread the novel so many times.
BUT... the inner narrative of Sheila-her super-insightful take on the world around her, complete with prejudice that even the first time I read it made me cringe (Sheila/Parent is often so homophobic I wanted to punch her... but then she would add a detail that showed what she really was was jealous of people who knew and liked themselves more than she did... and I guess that obnoxious language is how people other than my super-liberal extended family actually thought and talked, to their discredit), is what worked on the page and never would on the screen.
I hated every change they made to the book for the movie, but since I was, even as a kid, the original annoying, 'the book is so much better' critic, it didn't surprise me that this version was a tremendous disappointment. It is, however, years later, an EXCELLENT reminder to stop hoping they'll ever make a movie of my counterpart favorite novel (Wilton Barnhardt's "Emma Who Saved My Life"). Some stories are only meant to 'come alive' in our imagination while we read. This was a movie I wished I had never seen.
The two stars are because I devoutly hope some people who'd never read the book did so after trying the movie. But, really, what a waste of money, effort, and time (including mine).
It's a cliché, but... 'read the book instead'. REALLY!!!!
CSI: Vegas: Dead Memories (2023)
Painful, lazy writing
Two specific instances of writing so lousy that we paused the episode to (simultaneously) roll our eyes and insult the dialogue, and that's NOT including the lamest sub-plot ever for Folsom, who's had a few (as has poor Max, who's too smart and educated, both, to say stupid stuff about not believing in therapy for PTSD).
Allie (the character-not the actress; she is fine-is already the worst Mary Sue since Abby on NCIS) saying, 'well, you've only got one mum'... UGH. Seriously? Just yuck. Terrible, unaware response to someone talking about their dysfunctional parent. Do all Hollywood writers think we're all one perfect conversation away from reconciling with bad parents? We're not.
And then Serena saying to Allie something about 'what's up with your friend Josh?' because he's not texting back? NO ONE who's been dating a guy for months (or a season, in TV terms ) would call him that to the ex. And then Allie explains what's going on with him, like she understands him better than the woman dating him. Or like, to the writers, Allie has the legitimate relationship with Folsom rather than Serena. We keep saying we feel for the actress playing this character who, to the writers, often appears to just be Not Allie.
I just can't believe professional writers are so tone deaf to the universal detestation people have for Mary Sue characters... do they never talk to anyone but other writers? The more praise you write for other characters to heap on them, the more times you have them be the only one to solve a case, and the more times you have them break up a good relationship just by being Their Own Too-Perfect Selves...
... the more many of us groan and say to each other, 'ugh, Allie's gonna be front and center in this one... shall we skip it?' We even joked that we should make a drinking game; every time the character says something insufferable. But we decided we'd be drunk before halfway through the episode... oh, and we're too old for drinking games.
Stick to the cases, drop the soap opera dialogue, and please let other people shine once in a while. Did everyone know they were joining the cast of The Allie Show?
Mighty Cruise Ships (2014)
Interesting subject matter; annoying narration
Just saw an episode, and it was actually very interesting. Well-edited, well-written. Not the sort of thing I would watch often, but I would certainly recommend it to anyone who is fascinated by engineering or ships or both.
One thing that really ruined my enjoyment of the episode, however, is that the narrator was either directed to or took it upon herself to read everything as if the subject matter was hilarious. I swear she sounded like she had a huge smile on her face as she described how close the top of the ship-or the captain's head-got to the bridge they were going under. It made it sound like she had no comprehension of what she was reading.
For narration, it's not enough to pick someone with a pretty voice; there should be intelligence in the intonation. And while describing a possible expensive accident, it shouldn't sound like you're talking about a surprise party. I really hope she didn't do this in the rest of the episodes, or I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, no matter their interest in the subject.
The Rookie (2018)
Loved it... hope it's not turning serious on us
Up until "La Fiera", we would rate this show as high as it gets. (Ya know, it's not "Lucifer"- but it's still great!) When we watch a show the same night it airs, you know we like it.
The characters are great, and when they lose someone, the replacement is different but equally great. I would love to see Jackson get more romantic storylines now that he's out-or, well, get his actor boyfriend back-but that's a minor quibble.
It's funny, fast-paced, and even though Nolan is too good to be true, they play with that in a witty, tongue-in-cheek way, having everyone point it out, so he's not a total Mary Sue. I love that they didn't keep him with Lucy; no need to have another "Blue Bloods" thing where it's quite obvious why married/dating cops should not be partners.
I just hope they remember why this show is great fun, emphasis on the fun. Writing staff: One more lecture 'ripped from the headlines', and I'm out. I see it on the news, I read about it, and I vote against it. But please don't think you're teaching anyone anything. All you're doing is turning us off. Which means we'll turn you off.
It's supposed to be fun. Even kids hate being lectured. Why would you think adults will (indirectly, through ratings) pay your extremely large salaries to have you tell us how much the world sucks for minorities? As one (and the mom of two more), I already know. I'm here for escapism, not heavy-handed, unsubtle anvils dropped on my head.
If that's the direction you're going, prepare to lose the audience you originally went after (and caught).
Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)
Worst superhero movie of ever
Just painful. Heterocentric, saccharine claptrap. And ending with a snowstorm? The only cliché that was missing by the end. Proof there is too much money in Hollywood is that this got made.
Carol's Second Act (2019)
Vomitously bad
I didn't literally vomit, but I did stick my finger down my throat and make a retching sound. More than once.