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Reviews
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country (1991)
Star Trek as inept message movie.
Star Trek VI, on paper, has a lot going for it. It's an even numbered Trek, those are supposed to be good right? And Christopher Plummer, who doesn't love him? Plus Nicholas Meyer is back to direct, and he did the very good Star Trek II. In fact, in theory, this should be a very good movie, and it's quite likely people have convinced themselves that it is.
It isn't.
See, Star Trek VI is a heavy handed, ineptly constructed, and far too obvious message picture. Throughout, there are all sorts of references to people in the Federation hating Klingons. Because, get it, racism is bad! Look at how bad racism is! But in its execution, this heavy handed execution is so inept and obvious it ruins the film. Everything ties into the overall theme of how bad racism is, to the point where it becomes absolutely absurd.
What makes it worse is that they're using Star Trek, and beloved Star Trek characters to push this message, when it is so completely inappropriate in the world. Star Trek has, for years, been founded on how in the future these petty distinctions would be overcome, and people would become more enlightened about these things. And yet, when it's convenient, they throw all that out. It's sickening.
Star Trek: Insurrection (1998)
Get a bunch of friends together with a number of cameras, a large crew, and a huge special effects budget....
Star Trek: Insurrection is a silly movie, of that there is no doubt. The plot is designed to let characters have fun (Klingon puberty, for example), the dire situation is just dire enough to be interesting, but not enough to get in the way of the actors just kicking back and having a blast, especially since they spend a lot of time in pretty terrain enjoying themselves.
This makes sense. The actors from the TNG crew are known for being quite close, and being directed by Frakes, there were few outside influences to get in the way of their good time. There are a lot of little gags and moments where it's clear the actors just wanted to goof off. This, for some people, might hurt things. But for me, it works. It catches the TNG crew as they haven't been seen for years, just having fun and enjoying each other's company. It doesn't make for a movie that will rival the best movies in the series, but it's nice. If you like the characters - as I do - it's nice to see them all again, and it's nice to see them enjoying themselves. Sure some of the ideas were plain bad, or possibly in-jokes which the audience isn't privvy to, but as a whole, it's just good old fashioned fun with a group of old friends. How can you dislike that?
The Legend of Dragoon (1999)
Latent homosexuality, thy name is Legend of Dragoon.
Legend of Dragoon is your standard RPG. You know the type, random battles, swords, magic, questionable fashion sense, it's the standard game here. Only, it's not. See, there's this thing with Dart and Lavitz, two of the main characters. It might be the poor translation (and the translation IS pretty poor), but these two guys seem to be more than just good friends. For instance, when the game starts Dart has this girl he's trying to protect, like the good RPG hero that he is. In most cases, this would automatically lead to hot romance, no? However, Dart adamantly denies she's his girlfriend at all times, instead saying how like a sister she is. Odd, no? Shana, pretty hot (well, for a pile of polygons), obviously adores him, fertile, why ain't he pouncing on her like a dog on fresh steak? And Lavitz too is odd. High ranking soldier dude, pretty good looking, has a nice job, he should be raking in the ladies! But somehow he remains single. And when him and Dart get together, they are always having these 'bonding' moments whenever they meet, and I believe they even hug a few times. Plus, they talk about how good friends they are, and how the women folk can't understand their relationship. Uh huh guys.
It's also remarkable that, in spite of the open mindedness evident in Dart and Lavitz' relationship, how backwards the game is on other social issues. The women are ALWAYS told to go and prepare meals while the men fight things. You're so backwards when it comes to women LoD, yet so forward thinking when it comes to men.
The Rock (1996)
Everything wrong with Hollywood.
I've often heard things about Michael Bay, about how terrible his movies are, and how he couldn't direct himself out of a paper bag, and so on. Now, I was content to not confirm this theory, since I haven't heard a good thing about most of his movies, and cheap over-produced action movies are not generally my cup of tea. But, then the opportunity to watch The Rock presented itself, and I figured I might as well see if Mr. Bay was as bad as some people said.
Oh, yes, he most certainly is.
See, The Rock is the explosion filled wet-dream of an ADD addled teenager. Chases are often inexplicably overdone, with the characters aiming FOR people and objects, with enough cuts to make the whole thing an incomprehensible mess. Character development is forced, and crammed between the obligatory action sequences so haphazardly one wonders if any thought at all was put into it. Many shots don't make sense in context and look developed for the film trailer, and there are often massive errors in scripting - though many are late in the film and I don't want to spoil anything. Often the film also goes for cheap, emotional moments which simply don't work, especially since the characters are never presented as remotely likable and relatable - in spite of the haphazard "development".
This film has a rating of 7.0 here, yet I found it almost completely unwatchable. Not only is it bad at being an action movie, it also happens to be overly full of itself. I'll even go so far as to say the more recent Catwoman was better, at least it knew it was crap.