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profsmichael
Reviews
The Whale (2022)
Redemption
For me the film is about the main characters redemption, and it hit that mark for me. I am a particularly unemotional person. Yet, several scenes of Frasier's portrayal hit me squarely between the eyes. Hard enough for them to water in fact. I was surprised by this, and maybe even would have been a bit embarrassed if someone had noticed if I were to be completely honest. The characters drive and single minded purpose floored me. Given the immense obstacles and his failure, by his own admission, of so many poor life choices he had made: the "one good thing" resonated powerfully with me.
In the film I saw a man tormented by his mistakes, and the terrible circumstances he suffered beyond his control. He blamed himself for everything, and really only had a sorrowful "I'm sorry" for everyone. Resigned in defeat.
However, not defeat with dealings with his daughter. For his daughter: He would do anything. Only see the best in her. Wish the most happiest of life for her. For her, he would sacrifice everything and give his last. Last step. Last breath. Last joy.
Redemption in the end.
Damn it, I did cry.
Jeepers Creepers 3 (2017)
Poorly written script and direction. At midway point a disaster
The original film was fantastic and has progressively worsened each iteration. Now, this third installment is quite frankly: terribly penned. Until midway, the film is fine. Nothing special, but rather bland fare. This I can stomach. The second half? Be ready for leaps of logic, physics, and honestly: cartoonish plot devices. Wiley Coyote Acme branded "tools" , "weapons" and a vehicle. Added to the nonsense; cartoonish and pretty terrible special effects for these parts of the movie. I literally fell out of my chair laughing at what was totally meant to be serious. The ridiculousness spoiled the entire movie for me, and made this an avoidable movie for anyone not a fan of unintentional farce. I am actually a fan of really bad movies, but you can't start this garbage midway thru a movie that you are striving to make serious. This is actually STUPID all in caps. I will avoid this writer/director combo in the future.
The Northman (2022)
Vikings TV Show was superior in every way.
Despite the list of several good actors, the only one that I felt performed well was Skarsgard ( for what he had to work with ). Huge fan of Ethan and Nichole... but I hated both of their performances completely in this. I blame direction as well as the script. I know for a fact that they can act! In this; it was cornball, cheese and just awful really. I was looking forward to this film! I wish I had not seen it now, and cannot describe how disappointed I am in words. Anya did okay I felt with what she was given, but not to the level of Alexander. Don't get me wrong: Alexander should have never accepted this part, and it is not his best work. Everything was wrong with this.
Cinematography was very good, and shot very well however. Direction and script was sub-par to woefully inadequate. Acting for the most part, storyline, etcetera was what you would expect from an Asylum film. Really. Asylum. That bad. The only saving grace, as bad as all of it was in regard to a fair Asylum comparison: I did not find the costumes, location, props to be completely bogus. Asylum films disregard authenticity completely. In this, at least, The Northman did not suffer.
That said though: The choices and direction made it difficult to take it seriously. Not inaccurate per se... just not what I was expecting, or wanted in a Viking film. So much could have been done far better, and it shows I feel.
I wish I had liked it more. But I didn't.
Katt Williams: World War III (2022)
Unfunny preaching
Very disappointed in this special. Like so many others I found this to be particularly unfunny. Occasionally I cracked a smile, but struggled to get 3/4 of the way thru the program. I finally just turned it off.
"truths" and "lies" themed with a massive load of "God" preaching interweaved. Kat's "truths" were stretches of logic very often, and not really funny. Sometimes I actually had no idea what he was ranting about (been to 300 planets?!).
Excessive use of the falling limp on the stage stool body language to garner a laugh and indicate the punchline when the crowd was unsure if the joke was finished. I disliked that considerably. Was almost a caricature of himself when he did this after almost every joke.
I like Kat and wish him the best always. This was certainly not the best of his works for me, and I actually wish I had not watched it. It has detracted from my image of him after such a long wait between specials.
I will say that he is in great shape! I cant run around and prat fall even 1/3 of what he can do!
America: The Motion Picture (2021)
Extremely Unfunny!
Someone failed history in a big, big way! Juvenile and stupid. I cannot tell you just how terrible this movie is in words alone. You would need to be strapped into a chair, your eyes propped open, and shown horrific scenes that would make you violently ill every time the mere title was overheard by you.
The Rebels of PT-218 (2021)
OLD Grandfathers on a PT boat in WWII!?
A 65 Year old LT (Eric R) was bad enough... but a 77 Year old Seaman (Danny T)? You have got to be kidding me!
Low budget (factual) movie. Not really factual as the setting (description) is 1942 and the Hound was not in service and completed until 5 March 1943!
Just bogus all the way around. Far too much suspension of disbelief is required for this "stinker". Stinker is actually a term from 1942, and is appropriate in every sense. It is also more accurate timeline wise than this disgrace of a picture.
At least as old as the actors are, they are still too young to have even been alive at the time this supposedly takes place. Historically questionable, and I might even venture offensive to the actual crewman aboard her.
Pass on this, if you have any decency.
Amulet (2020)
Slow and plodding its way to a nonsense ending.
Extremely slow getting anywhere. Once it does get where it is going, you wish it hadn't. A boring journey. Nonsense made up ideology that goes unexplained completely. Terrible story telling (Direction and writing). Pass on this. You can't say you were not warned.
Devil's Revenge (2019)
What?
A terrible movie by any measure. Direction and editing created immense stretches of shots that add to the already far too long play time. Although probably meant to give the illusion of a long travel, it rather cemented in reality how terribly far Devil's Revenge had to travel to be a good movie.
Extremely irritating plot holes that are left to fester for the entire movie, and plot pieces that seemingly had nothing to do with the main plot at all.
People are disappear and people just appear in the movie without any explanation whatsoever. We have time to explore caves and rivers, but no time to explore rationality. I suppose maybe transporters were used? Why not, if it is up to our imaginations and does not have to be rational: so be it.
Shatner has a strange rant that I replayed several times... and I still have no idea what he was going on about. He was passionate, and Kirk swears, which I thought was very funny! Other than that; I gave up trying to figure it out. I simply didn't actually care what his character was trying to convey with his fathers heirloom shotgun... that he keeps in a dirty stable.
Very flimsy plot pieces with flimsy connections throughout. White actors playing Aztecs? Aztecs with a shrine in a Kentucky cave system. Conquistadores... really?
Direction: I am not sure their was any direction. Yes, we did realize Jeri Ryan was driving in circles in a parking lot for an entire scene. Rather easily actually.
The best actor in this movie was the Recreational Vehicle. RV played such a convincing filthy and dilapidated Southwind that I nearly wept.
Even "Riff Trax" will probably pass on this movie... Shatner or not. You should too.
Anunnaki (2017)
Leaps of imagination and of logic!
What a flake. The leaps of logic are only matched by the incredible leaps of imagination that is required to tie any of this "information"/"proof" together! Presented as factual information, without any single shred of actual meaningful data. Poorly written and directed, as well as just a plain waste of everyone's time altogether. I thought this was a fictional movie... not a extremely bad documentary.
I sometimes enjoy these ancient alien tropes, as I find them generally and laughably entertaining. In this case, not even a grin crossed my lips. Just too darn boring, and inane to even laugh at for me.
I find Giorgio Tsoukalos a laugh riot. Philip Gardiner is noTsoukilakialalaos. I call him (Giorgio) that, as I will learn to actually pronounce his name when he can be bothered to pronounce the word extraterrestrial. Since he must say extraterrestrial a few hundred times on camera every outing, you would think he would put forth the effort wouldn't you? Nope. We get "essata-estial". Even your German (English is my second language) cult leader says it better than you do.
I digress. Anunnaki is just a terrible film by any measure. A poor IMDB rating, and this is the one and only review (as of this writing) should tell you something.
Stay far, far away.
The Gong Show (1976)
Almost Perfect
Some of the acts may be staged for the celebrity guests, but I simply don't care. This isn't or does not need to be reality TV> I am waiting for the return of the unknown comic! Tommy Maitland is some kind of weird conglomeration of the late Robin Williams, and Mike Myers (as Shrek). It works perfectly! The one liners from Maitland are a jewel. I am not sure who the shows writer is... be he/she/they are geniuses.
Watch this show for some great goofy fun. You will not regret it.
Kong: Skull Island (2017)
Monster Movies from yore
Captures a great deal of the Japanese Monster movies magic of yore for me. I loved those films growing up... and I enjoyed this film in the same vein. Music score the "next movies" along those lines please/ *hint- wink*
Not to be taken too seriously,so enjoy the ride (some plot issues and acting was wanting for me personally). I absolutely hope to see the teasers come to fruition at the end of the movie! No spoiler... watch to the very end!
Split (2016)
Dreaded this movie, but it was unexpectedly good.
I dread M Knight movies anymore, as I have the opinion the scripts always feel as if they were written by a thirteen year old kid. While that still holds true for me (super powers, vengeful trees, space aliens thwarted by h20 etc.) I was pleasantly surprised that I liked this movie. Despite the stretch of imagination required for some plot points in this movie (not as far reaching as some others in the past have been) I did legitimately like the movie, and I believe it was because of McAvoy's immense talent.
James McAvoy could easily have slipped into a campy portrayal that had a strong potential in this script. He did not. I felt he was believable, and placed a superb premium on professional effort that was apparent to the viewer from the beginning.
Any other actor, and I do not believe this movie would have worked.
If you, like me, would have passed on another M Knight foray... rethink that choice and give this movie a try. I do not think you will regret it (despite the ending... I was satisfied with the stories ending and not the (I feel) tacked on final scene).
Channel Zero (2016)
Syfy Protected
Not 100% on board with the series so far, but at least Syfy can't disappoint yet again by canceling this!
As is so often the case with SyFy; the danger of entertaining a story line that never gets completed due to an untimely death (ie: Cancellation) is extremely likely! This is at least protected from SyFy executives, as each episode is a self contained story.
Not entirely sure why I am bothering to watch Syfy any longer, I simply don't trust them any more.
I am willing to try a few more episodes--just remember the actual stories this series is based upon were created by groups of non-professional writers to begin with. So far, I don't see the "professional" writers "punching up" the stories much better than the original amateurs copy.
Sausage Party (2016)
R-rated 13-Year-Olds
While technically funny in places.... this is really just a sex, gay, or stoner gag: one after another for an hour and a half!
Seriously wears very thin after 30 minutes or so.
Unfortunately this gets the distinction for "first R rated CGI Animated Feature Film". It may just kill the genre before it starts.
Really good opening weekend for a sub 20 million title. Made a profit, so there will be more of this.
Seth, Jonah, and Evan are without a doubt: the OLDEST 13 year-old kids I have ever heard of. Guys, you are funny, but seriously? Gag after gag is not a movie.