Change Your Image
MattKingCole
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
Interstellar Wars (2016)
THE worst movie I have ever seen, incompetent, idiotic and hilarious
You see that poster? The spaceship looming over Earth and blasting it to smithereens? Well in the film you get a pathetic little thing the size of a house sit about in the air for a while with it's five drones shooting airships.
They say the world has been completely destroyed, but you never see any of it. Everyones always like "civilsation has been completely destroyed". But all the alien do is as follows: turn a few dozen people into 'zombies', destroy a military drone and a couple fighter jets, and... that's it.
The young actors all try and be as sexy as possible. One girl spends the entire second half of the film wearing her shirt unbuttoned, and my belt is longer than the short shorts they all wear.
But I did find myself laughing and crying into a cushion multiple times throughout the film. Most notably at the first scene in the desert where all the actors just start making out for no reason then an old man comes in and says "is this sexy party got an invitation list or can I join in?" then he turns into a zombie.
That should sell it to you.
The Magnificent Seven (1960)
It's quite good. But if it were released today it wouldn't be as received well. And I can prove it... next year.
With them remaking this remake next year, might as well review this movie. Why not?
tl;dr: It's pretty good, but don't just because it's old doesn't make it better.
This movie goes to show that Hollywood's always been about avoiding originality. This is one of those yankification movies, taking a foreign movie that was in a foreign language, and bringing it home, like the granddad of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. Only, unlike new yankifications, The Magnificent Seven set it in a new location. Cowboy's instead of Samurai's.
The characters are pretty nice, I liked Kyrton from Red Dwarf's dad in this (that's what he looks like). And I liked a couple of the other cowboy's. The story was well told but lacked good characters, the final fight was good. And the music is bloody amazing. Especially the villain piece. It's one of the best things about the movie.
I went on about this movie's age quite a bit, and there's a good reason for it. It came out in 1960. It's kid friendly. It's got a lot of charm to it. I can see why people would see past the faults in the character department. I wish we could see more of the villain's story here.