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4/10
Uh...
3 January 2024
Warning: Spoilers
The movie started strong and got me interested, but nearly every character is super unlikeable, aside from Mahershala Ali. Even if that was the point, it kind of pulled me away from the story and didn't give me a reason to feel sorry for any of them. Both daughters are annoying, the son KEPT pulling his teeth out like a dumbass, and Julia Roberts' character is semi-racist and somehow is considering cheating on her husband after dancing to a song about boners. The daughter is obsessed with FRIENDS for some reason and the ending left me feeling like "what?" It feels like they left it ambiguous for a reason but they didn't hit anything home. Might've worked better as a mini-series.
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Good Burger (1997)
10/10
The Pinnacle of Cinematic Perfection
7 January 2020
What can you say about Good Burger that hasn't been said about Citizen Kane, Apocalypse Now, and The Godfather? At it's essence, it's the single greatest film of the 90's, and possibly of the 20th Century. Actually...no. Not possibly. It IS the single greatest film of all time. The genius of this work is in it's simplicity. The movie says so much with so little. When Ed says, "Welcome to Good Burger, Home of the Good Burger, can I take your order?", it's like he's speaking to you directly, and makes you question your existence as a human being. CAN he take your order? Do YOU know what you would like? HOW can I answer this? Can I answer at all? Do I really know what I want? All in all, an absolutely stunning masterpiece created by Dan "Spread Em Wider" Schneider. It is truly his Magnum Opus. There is simply no other film that measures up to Good Burger, except perhaps for its sequel, Good Burger 2: The Borgering of the Borger.
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