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karriak
Reviews
Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Road Chip (2015)
My excellent and well thought-out review.
This movie is utter garbage and I cant believe that I paid to see this. This franchise of god-awful movies should be handled like my wif.. I mean like my injured horse, just kill it off and be done with it. Here are my reasons why this movie was worse than Polio. 1. WHY? This movie didn't need to be made, no-one was asking for another Alvin and the s###munks movie, they only made this movie for people who didn't get to see star wars. Its like trying to arrest me for murd... I mean Its like doing another paranormal activity, It just wont go well. 2.The Plot Alvin is planning on doing something with female s###munk #1, and his s###munk friends have to stop him or else something bad happens. As you can probably realize I don't know that much about the plot. But that doesn't really matter when the movie is starring s###munks which all sound like the essence of a migraine headache. 3. Its just a kids movie brehh. To people who use the excuse that if a movie is bad they just say "well its just a kids movie", should be shown almost every animated Disney film ever and 70% Pixar movies. This is definitely a kids movie but that doesn't excuse sloppy filmmaking. 4. Conclusion If my wife would be alive today(may the devil torture her soul) she would say that this movie was worse than when I came out of my coma. I don't think that I need to tell you that you shouldn't see this movie, so i wont.
Kjellinn out.
The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2 (2015)
My excellent and well thought-out review
Well that was s###. First let me begin by saying that i am in no way a hater of the hunger games franchise. I thought the first two were fine, but this one is just awful. As every minute of the film goes on, the film gets even sillier. I tried my hardest not to laugh at it's stupidity, but I couldn't even get through 15 minutes without laughing. The film was the worst way to end this already mediocre trilogy. If you wanna see a good movie now, well then you're f#####. Unless if you haven't seen The Martian or Bridge of Spies yet, for some reason, i suggest that you just close your wallet and spend that hard earned(or the money that grandma gave you, but you feel really guilty because she just wants you to visit once in a while, but you don't because you are a bad person and don't see her except on special occasions or sometimes on Sunday's where you go to a coffee shop with the family,but this only applies to ages 7-17)cash on whatever it is that you fancy. Except if it,s some weird fetish thing that has to do with squirrels, the you're just a bad, bad person and i don,t want anything to do with you....freak.