darkphoenix-83164 Reviews

The Pope's Exorcist (2023)

Pure Spectacle with a touch of humor

[7/10 · 4 May 2023]

If you enjoyed the final half of the Exorcist, you'll find much of it here. While this film doesn't quite have the substance or realism of the aforementioned film, it does give you theatrics in spades, and it wastes almost no time in getting to the "good stuff". Evil kids tied to beds with scratches on their faces, hissing obscenities and looking less human by the day is the name of the game here, with a good dose of The Conjuring's bombastic hauntings and hellish showdowns to sweeten the pot.

While predictability inevitably creeps in and there's a feeling that you've seen it all before in the better films that inspired it, it's applied well here, with an occasional cheeky joke by Crowe's charismatic Father Amorth to make him relatable.

All things said, it's an often fun watch for fans of the demonic possession subgenre of horror that doesn't aspire to be great or memorable as much as spectacular. And therein it succeeds.

Illegal in Blue (1995 Video)

Dan Gauthier turned me gay

[8/10 · 10 January 2023]

What can I say, I was a teen, watching a naughty movie. I expected sex. What I didn't expect was a pretty hardcore unrated version featuring a handful of lenghty sex scenes, and starring a man who at the time was known for small, relatively pg roles. Not to take away from Stacey Dash, who to this day keep men feverishly hunting down this film (she is a beaut, no lie), but Dan brought an equal amount of sexy energy to the role which required a lot of skin and thrusting. For this reason, Illegal in blue is also sought after by men who like... well, men. It can be argued that, why not just watch porn, and the answer is, rare is the porn that features two fixations like Stacey Dash and Dan Gauthier having very convincing sex. For this reason alone, it remains one of the sexiest erotic/softcore movies of the 90s era and i strongly recommend nabbing the unrated version it you're here for that reason. There's a rather significant difference in the porny factor between the r and unrated.

Hypnotic (2021)

Dean Koontz should sue

[2/10 · 30 October 2021]

They basically just lowkey plagiarized his novel "False memory" and nobody even noticed. Can't believe Kate Siegel signed on for this, coming from the strong series her husband Mike Flanagan consistently puts out to accepting a cash grab daylight robbery like this one. Avoid at all costs.

Monsterland: New York, New York (2020) Season 1, Episode 7

Possibly the best one yet

[9/10 · 7 October 2020]

While the show is somewhat uneven from episode to episode, this one has been the most interesting so far. The figurative evils of greed become very literal in a way that will please fans of demonic possession fiction.

Gabriel's Rapture (2021)

A mile better than 50 Shades

[8/10 · 2 August 2020]

Why? Because at its core it's a film about a long courtship and a romance that is passionate but chaste, intense but forbidden. There are no hidden agendas and kinks here, isn't obsessed with being crammed with explicit sex scenes, but just good old fashioned emotional erotica. For those who still have even the slightest romantic side left, this might just make you melt in your chair while laughing at how silly you are for doing it. Bravo! Bring on the next one.

The Divide (2011)

Deeply unpleasant viewing

[5/10 · 25 July 2020]

I have seen my share of "group of people stuck together systematically go crazy and their humanity goes to hell". That said, this delivers an especially inhumane entry in the subgenre where men are practically vilified as monsters waiting to happen. Around the halfway mark half of the male semi-protagonists turn into rapists and the two women stuck with them (one of whom initially encourages their sexual appetites) are abused by the protagonists turned antagonists. The rest of the film pretty much revolves around how far these men will devolve and how hard the women are willing to fight. If you enjoy horrors that showcase humans turning on each other and watching their decency and humanity erode, it might be your kind of film, but be warned that it has little else going for it. Not even the odd choice of music or the impressive apocalyptic exterior scenes.

Don't Open Your Eyes (2018)

The bashers are at it again...

[8/10 · 7 October 2018]

Don't open your eyes has its flaws, that's for sure. Lots of them, from too-heavy accents to pacing issues to the composed music drowning out the dialogue. If you look past that, though, it is a very creepy diamond in the rough. Watching it reminded me of when I first read Stephen King's Gramma, it felt like it drew inspiration directly from that. Needless to say, Gramma freaked me out, so naturally, this freaked me out too. It takes a very long time for the supernatural aspects to come into play but when it finally does happen, it's all kinds of spooky, and the last 30 minutes or so are one hell of a ride. Those that so boldly claim that it's the worst film they've seen or utter trash have clearly never seen an Uwe Boll or Tom Six movie or anything in that vicinity. This film lacks polish, has some issues, but aside from that, it was a very pleasant surprise, and I wholeheartedly recommend it above some other mainstream horror films.

Along Came the Devil (2018)

Accomplishes what it sets out to be

[6/10 · 28 August 2018]

Upon its release, as expected, everybody hated this film. Why? Because every film dealing with exorcism and tries to replicate the horrors through use of makeup, wall climbing and big yellow eyes immediately draws comparison to the father of this kind of subgenre - The Exorcist. How can any exorcism flick ever hold a candle to its glory? So yes, Along came the devil was passed the hardest of judgment. Was it a good? Not really. Was it bad? Hardly. What it was, and what I felt it wanted to be throufhout the course of its runtime, was an hour and a half of demonic goodness, aiming to please anyone who just felt like watching a possession movie with a friend and some popcorn and giggle at each other during jump scares. That is all this film is. Something to enjoy without judgment, without comparison, without disdain for it trying to be like the Exorcist. Because if you can look past all that, what we have here is a "pleasant" distraction for a horror fan who loves exorcism movies. Nothing more, nothing less.

Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII (2013 Video Game)

A flawed but stunning conclusion to the FFXIII series.

[8/10 · 18 December 2015]

I will admit, this game is nowhere near perfect, but after the absolute mess that was FFXIII-2, this was a terrific way of making up for it. It doesn't quite have the character driven narrative nor the expansive nature of the first, but LR is more of a finale for fans, and quite a spectacular one at that with a clear, simplistic yet focused plot that was lacking in the previous game. The new combat system is a huge improvement over the worn turn-based system present in the previous two and feels a lot more fast paced and involved. Lightning looks gorgeous and her appearance and skills can be customized with the garb system. The world is a whole lot smaller in scope, and the game feels too short but then again, there is a sense of urgency and the time limit does make you feel like you need to save as many souls as possible before the end. At first I didn't like that aspect of the game since I don't like rushing through a game, but soon came to realize that there is ample time to do everything and still have plenty of time to spare wandering about aimlessly. The interior buildings are my main complaint, as most of them feel like repeat maps and the endless corridors felt a bit claustrophobic and depressing. All the major characters return for the final game, which was awesome although their roles weren't as large as they should have been. The dialogue felt a bit forced and not as natural as the first. The side quests are numerous and easy to complete, although some feel unnecessary. The final boss is perhaps the best part, being challenging and over the top, but in a good way. And then there were the final cutscenes, which were beautiful and had me in tears and left me feeling completely satisfied with the overall experience, making up for any gripes I had with the game. All in all, it's a diamond in the rough and a terrific send off to those characters I came to know and love 5 years ago. I urge you to look past the flaws and just enjoy it, I know I did.

Dark Souls II (2014 Video Game)

The sequel you deserve!

[9/10 · 18 December 2015]

First off, if you have played DS1, you know what you're in for. It's not going to be an easy ride. It will test your resolve and your patience, it will demand that you learn from your mistakes and find an angle, it will punish you for being lazy, it will teach you a thing or two about tenacity. But perhaps most of all, it will create an unforgettable, rewarding experience that will stay with you for the rest of your days. This sequel is everything you could hope for and more. It retains the original's mean spirit but somehow becomes more accessible and less tedious. Enemies respawn a set number of times, the bonfires are closer together so you don't have to walk 5 miles to get back to that boss that has murdered you 50 times over. The combat is refined and more polished and this time around, you are encouraged rather than discouraged to be versatile in combat. While in DS1 you had to pick your class and stick to it, and being a mage was pretty much an invitation to suffer horribly through the game, this time around being a mage is a viable option. Cast times are faster, spells do more damage and have more variants and more enemies are weak to them. However, it's always good to have a trusty halberd or greataxe in hand too, as well as a greatbow and shortbow and your trusty pyromancy flame. Being versatile means you can handle anything. The only class that I have found underwhelming is the faith build, or perhaps I just don't know how to use it? While I did love the realm of Lordran, Drangleic is more vast and has a more Gothic feel to it, where Lordran had a more medieval, enclosed vibe going for it. I am somewhat on the fence about the bosses. I did appreciate that they were more numerous, I think there are twice as many in DS2 than its predecessor, but they weren't as unforgettable as the bosses in DS1 were, nor as challenging. Besides the optional bosses, which border on unfair, most bosses could be breezed through in two or three tries where in the last game each one was worth at least a dozen death sentences, and thus immortalized them in your mind. The areas you visit range from downright ugly and unpleasant (the Gutter, the Crypt and Harvest Valley) to eerily beautiful (Huntsman's Copse, Shaded Woods, Iron Keep and Lost Bastille) to simply breathtaking (Dragon Aerie, Castle Drangleic, Heide's Tower of Flame and Shrine of Amana). Character customization has improved, with more attire to be found and worn to great effect, most carrying special properties that help immensely. The story is still ambiguous, as has become custom, but that is part of what makes it so unique. Dark Souls' lore and story is a topic that could be discussed and debated for hours upon hours, and this time isn't any different. If you're a fan, you're in for a treat. If you're not, after this you certainly will be.

Castlevania: Lords of Shadow 2 (2014 Video Game)

Beautiful to look at, but something feels off

[7/10 · 18 December 2015]

Well this was something I had been meaning to do ever since I picked up a controller. Playing as Dracula has been a dream of mine forever. Controlling him, you traverse the large Gothic city built upon your old castle's ruins and ally yourself with an old enemy to stop an even greater foe's imminent return. Systematically, you hunt down those responsible for bringing him back and kill them, all the while being plagued by visions of your long lost son who takes you back in time to your castle in hopes of regaining your latent powers and your lost memories. This all sounds great on paper, doesn't it. Well it's great in practice as well, except for one thing... the game feels and looks like Guillermo del Toro directed it. I know most of you will be pleased to hear this... But to me, the creature designs were just fine before they became all... Outlandishly weird, with the exception of Raisa Volkova's final form. Besides that, the scenery is quite the sight to behold, the "memories" of the castle especially. I often found myself standing completely immobile for minutes at a time marveling at the sights around me, and that is truly an accomplishment. The combat is mostly similar to the previous LoS installment, with the exception of the Void sword and the Chaos Claws that replace your blue and red whip while maintaining each color's magical properties. As Dracula, you progressively gain abilities like turning into mist to move past metal bars and become temporarily invulnerable to damage, swarm of bats to distract your enemies and possess them, the ability to morph into a pack of rats to climb through ducts and get past enemies and of course your blood daggers and relics. The puzzles are back, and there are one or two particular ones that might send you up the wall as it did me. The semi-open world draws a lot from Dark Souls in the way that most areas are interconnected and lead you back to the starting point. Fast travel is available though, if you can find the nearest map room. The trials are done away with and are replaced by arena challenges, unlocked by collecting specific artifacts. So to summarize... LoS2 is a great, gorgeous game with perhaps the most detailed and beautiful environments I have seen in a long time. I just wish they hadn't gone so over the top with the creature designs and had more powers for Dracula, I mean, c'mon he's Dracula? Worth at least a try though, even if it's just for the endless eye candy all around you.

Rise of the Tomb Raider (2015 Video Game)

As solid as its predecessor but lacks the technical polish

[8/10 · 18 December 2015]

I loved the Tomb Raider reboot. It was a lot more accessible and a lot less frustrating than the original series. I was dazzled by the size and scope of the island, the fast paced cinematic "escape" sequences, the simple yet captivating shooting mechanics and the boldness of delving so frankly into supernatural territory. Rise of the Tomb Raider just came out a few weeks ago here and I nabbed it as soon as I was able. It delivered everything I expected it would, a decent story with Lara's first encounter with Trinity and the race to find the "Divine source", an object that grants those that gaze upon it immortality before it falls into Trinity's fanatical hands. The combat remains fun, fast paced and somewhat easier with less need to take cover and instead allowing the run and gun approach. The traversal is more detailed this time around, with Lara having more tools at her disposal which unlocks areas previously inaccessible to her, like the Rebreather, Broadhead climbing arrows, and the ability to throw her pickaxe as a grapple hook. The crafting system has been overhauled, with Lara being able to craft bigger ammo and resource storage pouches as well as innumerous upgrades for each variant of pistol, shotgun, machine gun and bow. Most of these upgrades requires special animal hides, which Lara can acquire by finding hidden caches or through good old fashioned hunting. Bears and feral felines make an appearance this time as potential hunts for rare skins, but they won't go down without one hell of a fight... Lara can craft special ammunition on the go and accept side quests from allies who reward her with otherwise unobtainable rewards like new gear or attire. The tombs this time are more numerous and a lot more complicated to solve, at least the first time around. Completing them rewards Lara with unique skills like faster climbing, triple arrow shots and the ability to mine for rare metals required for the best weapon upgrades. There are also crypts in which Lara may find weapon parts and coin caches she can dig up to trade for weapon attachments and unique weapons. Unlike the previous game, it is highly unlikely that you will be able to acquire every skill and upgrade before the end, unless of course you enjoy grinding the same groups of enemies for hours, and so skill and upgrade choices need to be selected more thoughtfully and resources spared for the weapons you enjoy using most. The areas Lara visits are not as numerous as the previous game, but they are unquestionably larger, some maps may take hours and hours to complete while the transition areas usually take about an hour. Not every NPC is hostile towards Lara and there is one particular area that is home to a village filled with friendlies who Lara must help defend against Trinity. Some of these NPC's are quest givers, adding an RPG feel to the game. But there are unfortunately some hiccups that I need to mention (for X360). Traversal is somewhat clumsy, Lara might miss that ledge you are trying to grab, backtracking is a pain and sometimes impossible without using a campfire, and might even prove to be game-breaking if you press forward where you're not supposed to. I encountered such a glitch in Path of the Deathless where the game bugged out after I tried to fall through another previously traversed pitfall which I obviously wasn't meant to, and the game broke at this point where I got stuck, every time I tried moving past the last campfire I used the autosave would take me right back to the moment I fell in between the ice, with no way of continuing. This forced me to start from scratch all over again. The other technical problem I have heard about is during the final ascent you are forced to shake off someone who is trying to drag you to your death, then the game prompts you to shoot him repeatedly until he falls. When this happens, and you have no ammo, the game once again breaks as the autosave prevents you from going back and without ammo, you can't continue either. I have also found that some achievements don't unlock even when you have completed the requirements, especially the Compulsive achievement. One last thing I noticed is that the high diving challenge is extremely glitchy. So all in all... RotTR improves on the original by adding larger maps and more traversal methods, but ultimately lacks the polish of the original. Enjoy, but try to back up your saves...

Castlevania: Lords of Shadow (2010 Video Game)

God of War for the horror fan

[9/10 · 18 December 2015]

Back when I got my first Xbox360 console (yes, little late to the game), this was one of the first titles I played on it. Let me just say that I went through a dozen or so games afterward before I found something that I enjoyed as much as this game. Having played God of War back in the day, I instantly recognized the similarities between the two games but it never felt plagiarized, instead it felt like the perfect gift to those of us who are more inclined to the darker genres. Not having played the other Castlevania games, I can't compare them at all, but playing this made me a bit sorry for missing them. As other reviewers have stated, you don't have control of the camera at all, which is a little jarring at first, but you get used to it and it's not such a terrible thing as everyone makes it out to be, because the camera is usually pointed right towards that gigantic Gothic castle or that eerie decrepit tower in the distance (for example), and it does a great job of showing you what you need to see, and there is much to be seen. The combat is pretty much GoW-fare, with Gabriel wielding a combat cross to battle all sorts of enemy types. The titan/undead dragon traversal were moments where my palms got sweaty as I clung on for dear life to giant animated stone giants that constantly tried throwing me off. The quick time events are a bit distracting but that's not so bad. The bosses are fun and the puzzles are challenging but not too difficult. Some may argue that this game is derivative and unoriginal. They might be right, but I have never had so much fun playing something so "unoriginal" and "derivative". And I liked the twist at the end after the credits... Nice little setup for the sequel, although not explained exactly how or why. One of the most gorgeous games that I have played, without a doubt.

Final Fantasy XIII-2 (2011 Video Game)

Terrible excuse for a sequel

[5/10 · 18 December 2015]

I'm in no way saying that this is a horrible game, I'm saying it is a horrible sequel and it does not feel like it belongs in the XIII series. My five main concerns are this: 1. The game is nearly completely devoid of the characters that graced the first, instead making the bold decision to put the spotlight on a secondary character and reducing all the main characters to small cameo roles. It unfortunately, was a move that didn't work for me. 2. The plot is one gigantic mess. Yes, XIII itself didn't tell the most linear and obvious of tales, but it was intriguing and the narrative and interaction between the 6 characters made up for the minor plot drawbacks and in the end, it was unlike anything I have experienced. This time around, it feels like the writers got drunk on their success and then came up with 200 ideas and just threw them all together without caring that they didn't really make sense or seemed interesting. 3. The battle screen looks dull and colorless, except of course when you take damage and that sickening red pops up on the edges of the screen. 4. The final boss is insanely easy, so easy in fact that I didn't even need to shift paradigms once. 5. The dialogue and voice acting is sub-par. All the voice actors seem bored or as if they're reciting their lines to a friend while they're sipping margharitas on the beach instead of in a sound-booth. All in all, this was a huge disappointment compared to the high standards set in FFXIII and should only be played for the sake of continuation and understanding Lightning Returns.

DmC: Devil May Cry (2013 Video Game)

People hate change, despite the game being amazing

[9/10 · 18 December 2015]

I have absolutely no idea why more people haven't stepped forward to support this game. The thing about reboots and remakes is people immediately hate them because they're unable to let go of the originals. Reboots serve to bring a new vision forward instead of creating yet another sequel that would disappoint people anyway because it "lacks this" or "lacks that" that was present in the original. So much unnecessary complaining. And then it puts other people off from playing what might just be a terrific game. Take for example the Tomb Raider reboot series. It FAR surpasses the original series. Now take the Resident evil game series that has disappointed fans over and over again by growing further and further away from its roots and becoming an action shooter. I personally don't see anything wrong with that since it is made up for with the Revelations spin-off games, but my point is, Capcom would be better off to do a reboot than make another sequel, because the direction they have taken isn't working in their favor anymore. But let me get to this game, and why I feel that it should be played and appreciated. First, the new Dante is an instant winner. He's snarky, foul-mouthed, confident and looks pretty damn good with and without his shirt on. I might stand alone on this, but I actually prefer the new, younger Dante. The combat is as shallow or layered as you want it to be, with dozens upon dozens of different combo techniques for you to discover and become an unstoppable force or you could just mash the slash over and over and not get the full experience. The traversal and platforming is decent although a tad unfair in certain spots. The world of limbo is hellish and unique, especially an entire section where you traverse a massive nightclub in limbo or a mirrored upside down cityscape. The soundtrack pumps life and energy into every battle and action-filled cutscene, especially during the final boss battles. Speaking of boss battles, they are complex but not too complex, each one having its weak spots that higher difficulties demand you to find. The bosses themselves are well designed and there is a beauty in their grotesque appearance. The dialogue and voice acting is sharp, witty and often hilarious and adds a level of depth and a sense of humor to what might have been dull and uninteresting characters. The plot itself is surprisingly intricate for a Capcom game, with cutscenes that drive the story forward and flesh Dante out instead of merely serving to bring you to the next battle. The difficulty isn't as extreme as other Devil May Cry games and makes it more accessible to people who play rather for fun rather than a challenge. However, the higher difficulties do serve to satisfy those who seek them. All in all, DmC is a more than worthy reboot to a franchise that deserved one, and I stand behind the new Dante and hope to see more of him in a sequel. If any game deserves one, this is it.

Alan Wake (2010 Video Game)

Great game hampered by repetition

[8/10 · 17 December 2015]

First of all, I am a fan of Alan Wake and I'd play the sequel in a heartbeat if they ever made one. It's atmospheric, cinematic and rife with panicked encounters. At least, it is for the first two chapters. After that, it loses much of its magic for the simple reason that you become conditioned to it. There are only so many possessed humans jumping out of bushes and coming at you with an axe you can handle before it becomes laborious to blind them and then shoot them. Rinse and repeat over and over again for 6 full chapters. What the game desperately needed was a more varied backdrop than endless forests at night time and swarms upon swarms of the same enemy type. Despite this, it remains one of the better horror games out there, and for this very reason it is still that cult classic that people just can't seem to stop talking about. If you haven't had your hands on a copy yet, what are you waiting for?

Resident Evil: Revelations 2 (2015 Video Game)

Main campaign is only half the game

[8/10 · 17 December 2015]

I love Resident evil games in general, but as of late they've shifted the focus more on action rather than horror aspects. The Revelations series serves to remind us that Capcom is still fully capable of delivering chills and creating horrifying creatures. The final boss is truly a beautifully grotesque work of art that disturbs as much as fascinates. The game is also filled with eerie moments and intense encounters all the while providing limited ammunition, so every shot counts. However, as interesting as the main campaign is, Riot mode is where the real meat lies, taking up hours and hours of your time in an addictive mini-role playing action game that will give you a unique experience with every character you build up from scratch. All in all, a must have for fans of survival horror and action alike.

South Park: The Stick of Truth (2014 Video Game)

The definitive South Park experience

[8/10 · 17 December 2015]

I'm not sure if I'm the only one that feels like South Park has been stretched way past its limit or maybe I'm just getting old, but I haven't seen a truly funny episode in a very long time. Along comes SOT and makes up for all that. It's hilarious, ballsy and shameless. Perhaps the greatest achievement is that it hardly ever feels like a video game and certainly doesn't look like one. The turn-based battles are a nice throwback to older rpg games while simultaneously feeling fresh and funny (especially when "Princess" Kenny is involved). If you're a South Park fan and have been watching since the start, you absolutely should not miss this experience. My only complaint is the short length. 8 hours is pretty much the extent of it, but besides that, big love to Trey and Matt for giving us the South Park game we deserve. It's about time.

The Darkness II (2012 Video Game)

Decent, but not as good as the first.

[7/10 · 17 December 2015]

The Darkness 2 made some major changes, some good some bad. Among these, Brian Bloom replacing Kirk Acevedo for Jackie, a new shading for the visuals which made it more sharp and with a comic-book vibe that its predecessor lacked, alterations to the demon powers which were more smooth but felt downgraded and a villain that sadly didn't live up to the rest of the game. The most interesting feature was the collectibles, which act as occult artifacts you can collect and display, each having its own unique history, encouraging you to explore every nook and cranny for these interesting objects. The side quests are done away with and everything feels more linear, which is a bit disappointing. Jackie's mansion which also serve as the hub of the game is a nice touch and shows how much has changed though. Oddly, Darkness 2 feels shorter in length than the first game and is less imaginative, but it remains a solid sequel worth a look, despite its shortcomings.

The Wolf Among Us (2013 Video Game)

Once upon a time meets Sin City

[8/10 · 17 December 2015]

What a unique game. The Walking Dead was good, really good but for some reason I preferred this. It's edgy, fantastical and often darkly comical. Not to mention an insanely bad ass protagonist. The numerous twists and turns coil together to create a sense that you have no idea what is going on or who the killer is. Best of all, you get to play your way, be the Big bad wolf everyone knows you for or the good guy trying his damnedest to make up for past mistakes. How you shape him is all up to you. The only gripe I have is that it does not optimally function on Xbox360 consoles, even with a hard-drive. Even so, it is an amazing experience and a unique mystery that needs to be experienced at least once. Definite must-play.

Watch Dogs (2014 Video Game)

Don't listen to the haters!

[7/10 · 17 December 2015]

Sure this game was over-hyped and it's far from perfect, but it is undeniably fun. The hacking is something new and interesting. Chicago is a great setting and the soundtrack kicks ass! I have no idea why nobody likes Aiden, I found him quite intriguing, the whole renegade without fear vibe is always fascinating. The stealth sections were decent and the hacking puzzles were adequately challenging, including for the collectibles. The only downside are the high speed car chases that were infuriating and are exactly the reason I stay clear of GTA games. The game didn't need such frustrations to weigh it down. All in all a great game with some minor flaws, but hardly anything that should keep you from trying it out.

Dead Island (2011 Video Game)

Great combat and beautiful open world with a practically non-existent plot and lifeless characters.

[7/10 · 17 December 2015]

Let me start off with the negatives first. The singular purpose of every character other than yours is to send you on fetch quests. Besides that, they don't have any personality or additional dialogue. The plot consists of: go there, do that, come back, move on to the next group/area. Any events that happen that leads to you getting off the island could all be cut together in about 5 minutes tops. The voice acting is sub-par to the point where it sounds like they're reading the script for the first time, and there isn't a whole lot of diversity of zombies. Now on to the good parts. The resort, village and jungle is beautifully and intricately designed and could very well have been a real place. The combat is the game's finest point, with the weapons crafting adding to this. The zombies are relentless and despite lacking diversity in move sets and design, it is very easy to get swarmed if you don't watch your back and some of them are truly horrifying to look at. All in all, Dead Island is a good combat-driven zombie massacre that could have been a great one had there been more effort put into the characters, dialogue and plot.

Hitman: Absolution (2012 Video Game)

Pleasantly surprised, stealth can be fun

[8/10 · 17 December 2015]

I'm not a huge fan of stealth games, nor have I played the other Hit-man games, being a guns blazing kind of gamer. However, I gave this a try and I was amazed at how much fun it was to skulk around and being rewarded for killing only your target. The stealth isn't particularly difficult, especially on easier difficulties. Regarding the other aspects, I loved the atmospheric environments, the interesting conversations you can eavesdrop on and the dozens of ways the game presents you with for eliminating your targets and eluding everyone else, including the guns blazing way. Running and gunning takes all the fun out of it though and you'd miss out on the great rewards. All in all, solid game that I'm proud to own.

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood (2010 Video Game)

The final straw

[4/10 · 17 December 2015]

I admit, I enjoyed AC II, hated the first entry, and once again I'm disappointed. The mechanics, save system, platforming and parkour system is infuriating at best. I gave up after numerous times of almost smashing my controller against the wall when the game decides to steer the character left (and to a cheap death) instead of right like it was supposed to. To top it off, I have to go back and do an entire section of clunky platforming all over again to reach said point because the game doesn't auto save often enough. Needless to say, I won't be playing another AC game again. Which is a shame, I was curious to see where the story goes, but it just isn't worth the blood vessels I have to pop in order to do so.