joeyloran Reviews

Spirit Trap (2005)

Spirit Trapped

[2/10 · 1 February 2023]

I would have preferred a spoof on "The Parent Trap" with the twins as restless spirits playing pranks... I haven't fully flushed out the idea but I can say anything would be better than this film. The slow pace traps you for 90 minutes and fills you with the spirit of boredom. Tom has a mean right hook. *DV TW.

I watched this film on FAWESOME and in the description it mentioned the script was based on a video game? Couldn't find anything on Google about it, so if anyone knows what game they could be referring to, please let me know.

I wanted to like this movie but it left me feeling angry. Mostly angry at myself for not getting up and turning it off but the dog fell asleep on my legs and I didn't want to get up.

Lured Innocence (2000)

Not Spicy Enough

[6/10 · 30 April 2022]

Where was the hardcore male nudity in a movie that hinged on being sexy? Also, the psycho from Speed was hard to take seriously as someone capable of being lusted after and the journalist twunk was a joke of a lead. Sheri O'Teri shines in a small but serious role.

My Life as a Dead Girl (2015 TV Movie)

The soundtrack

[1/10 · 30 April 2022]

Is the absolute worst. It pulls you from any acting that is happening on screen. At best, I would give this movie three stars if they cut the horrendous lyrical ballads from every other scene. Wildly inappropriate scoring.

Beneath the Leaves (2019)

A family affair

[4/10 · 30 April 2022]

Holy Sorvino! I'm not sure who the bigger a$$hole is, the title of the film or the hat Mira wears through the second half. My partner and I came to support Mira and had some laughs along the way. The entire film feels like a test reel. It's really something special.