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pronusx
Reviews
Chucky: I Like to Be Hugged (2021)
None of these reviews are real
Ignoring the fact that the show itself is incredibly boring, ask yourself how anybody could sympathize with Jake in this show. He's a literal serial killer wanna-be, but worse because he's a coward who needs other people to do the dirty work.
Us (2019)
Interesting Idea, but Boring and Pretentious Execution
The acting in this movie was great and there are a few very funny moments...but nothing particularly scary or unsettling. Of course this highlights the primary issue with this movie, which is that it can't decide what it wants to be or what it wants to be about. You'd guess from the trailers (which present a genuinely terrifying idea) that it would be some sort of psychological thriller, but the movie plays out much closer to a slasher film.
The villain(s) are revealed halfway through the movie in full light, immediately demystifying them and making them not scary, and they also that that time to explain their motive in plain English, the remaining half of the movie is boring after that.
Blade (1998)
Fun movie, in a goofy way
My wife and I thought we would give this movie a try on Netflix, after watching the newest Venom which also blended horror with action/superhero themes. We had both remarked after watching Venom that we had wished it leaned more on horror and, in that sense, we expected Blade to properly fill that mold. Sadly Blade is much more of an action movie than anything else and there is never really a scene in the movie that feels at all scary.
This isn't to say the movie isn't fun, in fact many elements of the movie work together well and make it entertaining to watch, though it isn't clear how many of these elements are intentional or not (i.e. the strange and unnecessary flourishes Blade does when he brandishes a weapon or Blade's mentor Whistler who looks and behaves like he is LARP'ing Snake Plissken). Really it's this bizarre inability to decide on tone that makes the movie fun.
The Nun (2018)
Jump spooks for a plot
I feel bad for Valak, the defiler, the profane, the marquis of snakes, etc, etc, in this movie. I'm guessing by the time the director showed up to the set he had lost the script, screenplay, and basic plot of the movie on his commute over and proceeded to lock himself in his office, desperately wracking his brain to find a quick fix for his expectant, angry crew. In that moment, holding back tears, he noticed Valak's yellow eyes staring at him silently from the far corner of the room. An opportunity, he thought to himself as he approached the poor demon and shoved a laptop into his claws, demanding that Valak fill the substantial gaps in runtime with jump spooks or he would be fired without pay. Of course Valak capitulated to the fuming ape and I'm sure he's never been paid the overtime either; that's the real horror I think.
Venom (2018)
Wasted Potential, but Still Different!
Venom comes very close to shedding its Marvel pedigree, portraying scenes that are genuinely disturbing without feeling the need to cut tension with a joke, and indeed the first forty minutes or so feel like something wholly different than anything that came before. However as Eddie Brock slowly succumbs to the Symbiote so follows the superhero archetype, and by the time Venom has revealed himself in full he reminded me too much of characters I had already seen before. With all that said I would recommend watching this movie because it does take some risks and that alone was enough to make it fun, but don't be surprised if you come away wondering what could have been.
Gosnell: The Trial of America's Biggest Serial Killer (2018)
Listless movie, not worth spending money on
Halfway through the movie a judge, talking to a confused assistant district attorney and lead detective, commands that the Gosnell case will not be about abortion and will only discuss the criminality of Gosnell's actions. Nobody apparently prompts the judge to issue this statement, perhaps it was some unseen, higher authority, but in doing so she summarizes the plot of the film quite nicely: a factual overview of Gosnell's arrest and conviction. On my end, the Wikipedia page would have been more than sufficient.