I want my 2 hours back!
by iwals | created - 17 Jan 2012 | updated - 5 months ago | PublicThese are absolutely horrendous movies that I sat through, either against my will or hoping for something better. These titles should be avoided. In most cases, I would have rather spent an equal amount of time in a sensory deprivation tank. The blank screen before the previews started was the highlight of the movie-going experience in the case of these movies. This list, unfortunately, will continue to grow.
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1. Dune (1984)
PG-13 | 137 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi
A Duke's son leads desert warriors against the galactic emperor and his father's evil nemesis to free their desert world from the emperor's rule.
Director: David Lynch | Stars: Kyle MacLachlan, Virginia Madsen, Francesca Annis, Leonardo Cimino
Votes: 179,627 | Gross: $30.93M
2. The Blair Witch Project (1999)
R | 81 min | Horror, Mystery
Three film students vanish after traveling into a Maryland forest to film a documentary on the local Blair Witch legend, leaving only their footage behind.
Directors: Daniel Myrick, Eduardo Sánchez | Stars: Heather Donahue, Michael C. Williams, Joshua Leonard, Bob Griffin
Votes: 285,691 | Gross: $140.54M
3. Children of Men (2006)
R | 109 min | Action, Drama, Sci-Fi
In 2027, in a chaotic world in which women have somehow become infertile, a former activist agrees to help transport a miraculously pregnant woman to a sanctuary at sea.
Director: Alfonso Cuarón | Stars: Julianne Moore, Clive Owen, Chiwetel Ejiofor, Michael Caine
Votes: 529,544 | Gross: $35.55M
4. Magnolia (1999)
R | 188 min | Drama
An epic mosaic of interrelated characters in search of love, forgiveness and meaning in the San Fernando Valley.
Director: Paul Thomas Anderson | Stars: Tom Cruise, Jason Robards, Julianne Moore, Philip Seymour Hoffman
Votes: 328,591 | Gross: $22.46M
I loved the story in the introduction, but hated the rest of the movie.
5. Trust the Man (2005)
R | 103 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance
After much drama, cheating, and trial separations, two men fight to save their respective relationships.
Director: Bart Freundlich | Stars: David Duchovny, Julianne Moore, Billy Crudup, Maggie Gyllenhaal
Votes: 8,838 | Gross: $1.53M
6. Full Frontal (2002)
R | 101 min | Comedy, Romance
A day in the life of a group of men and women in Hollywood, in the hours leading up to a friend's birthday party.
Director: Steven Soderbergh | Stars: Julia Roberts, David Hyde Pierce, David Duchovny, Nicky Katt
Votes: 11,308 | Gross: $2.51M
7. The Tree of Life (2011)
PG-13 | 139 min | Drama, Fantasy
The story of a family in Waco, Texas in 1956. The eldest son witnesses the loss of innocence and struggles with his parents' conflicting teachings.
Director: Terrence Malick | Stars: Brad Pitt, Sean Penn, Jessica Chastain, Hunter McCracken
Votes: 184,157 | Gross: $13.30M
OK, I got this from Netflix and didn't watch the entire movie, but I did invest 30 minutes, so I feel it qualifies for this list. After a half hour, I fast-forwarded to see if it got any better. It didn't.
8. A Clockwork Orange (1971)
R | 136 min | Crime, Sci-Fi
In the future, a sadistic gang leader is imprisoned and volunteers for a conduct-aversion experiment, but it doesn't go as planned.
Director: Stanley Kubrick | Stars: Malcolm McDowell, Patrick Magee, Michael Bates, Warren Clarke
Votes: 881,549 | Gross: $6.21M
Considered a classic by most critics, I found it to be artsy-fartsy crap. Bizarre imagery, unlikeable characters.
9. Shadow of the Vampire (2000)
R | 92 min | Drama, Horror
The filming of Nosferatu (1922) is hampered by the fact that its star Max Schreck is taking the role of a vampire far more seriously than seems humanly possible.
Director: E. Elias Merhige | Stars: John Malkovich, Willem Dafoe, Udo Kier, Cary Elwes
Votes: 44,179 | Gross: $8.29M
Boring, two-dimensional characters, and a bizzare fictionalization of actual people.
10. Silent Running (1972)
G | 89 min | Drama, Sci-Fi
In a future where all flora is extinct on Earth, an astronaut is given orders to destroy the last of Earth's botany, kept in a greenhouse aboard a spacecraft.
Director: Douglas Trumbull | Stars: Bruce Dern, Cliff Potts, Ron Rifkin, Jesse Vint
Votes: 31,476 | Gross: $0.69M
11. Fireflies in the Garden (2008)
R | 99 min | Drama
The Taylor family is devastated by an accident that takes place on the day their matriarch is due to graduate from college -- decades after leaving to raise her children.
Director: Dennis Lee | Stars: Ryan Reynolds, Willem Dafoe, Emily Watson, Carrie-Anne Moss
Votes: 13,603 | Gross: $3.39M
12. Winter Passing (2005)
R | 98 min | Comedy, Drama
An editor offers actress/bartender Reese $100,000 for her late mom's letters from her novelist dad. She heads home from NYC to get them and finds her dad living in the garage while two strangers live in the house.
Director: Adam Rapp | Stars: Ed Harris, Zooey Deschanel, Will Ferrell, Darrell Larson
Votes: 8,902 | Gross: $0.10M
13. I Don't Know How She Does It (2011)
PG-13 | 89 min | Comedy, Romance
A comedy centered on the life of Kate Reddy, a finance executive who is the breadwinner for her husband and two kids.
Director: Douglas McGrath | Stars: Sarah Jessica Parker, Pierce Brosnan, Kelsey Grammer, Greg Kinnear
Votes: 21,222 | Gross: $9.66M
14. The Great Gatsby (2013)
PG-13 | 143 min | Drama, Romance
A writer and wall street trader, Nick Carraway, finds himself drawn to the past and lifestyle of his mysterious millionaire neighbor, Jay Gatsby, amid the riotous parties of the Jazz Age.
Director: Baz Luhrmann | Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Carey Mulligan, Joel Edgerton, Tobey Maguire
Votes: 597,141 | Gross: $144.84M
15. Before Midnight (2013)
R | 109 min | Drama, Romance
We meet Jesse and Celine nine years on in Greece. Almost two decades have passed since their first meeting on that train bound for Vienna.
Director: Richard Linklater | Stars: Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy, Seamus Davey-Fitzpatrick, Ariane Labed
Votes: 172,212 | Gross: $8.11M
16. Harry and Walter Go to New York (1976)
PG | 115 min | Comedy, Crime
In 1892, two vaudevillians and petty con artists get involved, together with the most notorious bank robber, in a New York City bank heist.
Director: Mark Rydell | Stars: James Caan, Elliott Gould, Michael Caine, Diane Keaton
Votes: 1,212
I only made it about a half-hour into this one. Reminded me of what many 1970s movies were like.
17. Prometheus (I) (2012)
R | 124 min | Adventure, Mystery, Sci-Fi
Following clues to the origin of mankind, a team finds a structure on a distant moon, but they soon realize they are not alone.
Director: Ridley Scott | Stars: Noomi Rapace, Logan Marshall-Green, Michael Fassbender, Charlize Theron
Votes: 644,406 | Gross: $126.48M
18. The Skeleton Twins (2014)
R | 93 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance
Having both coincidentally cheated death on the same day, estranged twins reunite with the possibility of mending their relationship.
Director: Craig Johnson | Stars: Kristen Wiig, Bill Hader, Luke Wilson, Ty Burrell
Votes: 44,867 | Gross: $5.28M
19. August: Osage County (2013)
R | 121 min | Comedy, Drama
A look at the lives of the strong-willed women of the Weston family, whose paths have diverged until a family crisis brings them back to the Oklahoma house they grew up in, and to the dysfunctional woman who raised them.
Director: John Wells | Stars: Meryl Streep, Dermot Mulroney, Julia Roberts, Juliette Lewis
Votes: 95,347 | Gross: $37.74M
Okay, I didn't sit through the whole two hours on this one. But 30 minutes in I hated every character except for the father, and I guess he died early on. I'm not sitting through another pretentious, self-important film that purports to be "art that I don't understand." I would have been happier if it was titled August: Osage County: After the Meteor Wiped Out the Annoying People. This is another movie that reminded me of how uncomfortable my chair is.
20. Kiss of the Spider Woman (1985)
R | 120 min | Drama
A gay man and a political prisoner are together in a prison. The gay man narrates the stories of two fake movies and his own life.
Director: Hector Babenco | Stars: William Hurt, Raul Julia, Sonia Braga, José Lewgoy
Votes: 17,357 | Gross: $17.04M
21. Life (I) (2017)
R | 104 min | Horror, Sci-Fi, Thriller
A team of scientists aboard the International Space Station discover a rapidly evolving life form that caused extinction on Mars and now threatens all life on Earth.
Director: Daniel Espinosa | Stars: Jake Gyllenhaal, Rebecca Ferguson, Ryan Reynolds, Hiroyuki Sanada
Votes: 253,995 | Gross: $30.23M
22. Babylon (I) (2022)
R | 189 min | Comedy, Drama, History
A tale of outsized ambition and outrageous excess, it traces the rise and fall of multiple characters during an era of unbridled decadence and depravity in early Hollywood.
Director: Damien Chazelle | Stars: Brad Pitt, Margot Robbie, Jean Smart, Olivia Wilde
Votes: 167,761
Disgusting and unwatchable! Turned off five minutes in. Graphically showed elephant defecating on men in opening scene. Second scene was woman urinating on man. Why?
23. The Little Shop of Horrors (1960)
Not Rated | 73 min | Comedy, Horror
A clumsy young man working at an impoverished flower shop discovers that the strange plant he has been nurturing has an insatiable appetite for blood, forcing him to kill to feed it.
Director: Roger Corman | Stars: Jonathan Haze, Jackie Joseph, Mel Welles, Dick Miller
Votes: 19,566 | Gross: $1.40M
24. Skidoo (1968)
R | 98 min | Comedy
Infamous psychedelic all-star comedy about ex-gangster Tony Banks, who's called out of retirement by mob kingpin God to carry out a hit on fellow mobster "Blue Chips" Packard. When Banks ... See full summary »
Director: Otto Preminger | Stars: Jackie Gleason, Carol Channing, Frankie Avalon, Fred Clark
Votes: 1,919
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