Movies Released in 2023 That I've Seen

Honor Among Thieves does a lot of things right, but the main thing is that it is just fun from start to finish, with several of the funniest scenes I've seen all year. I love how much this feels like a DND campaign, with problems solved through constant shenanigans and improvisation, but it never manages to make the stakes feel like they aren't there. It also understands that lore and world-building only really need to exist to move the story forward, it's not going to bog itself down explaining the history of its setting, because that ultimately doesn't matter. The cast are also great, feeling like a true ensemble of misfits. I also love the practical effects and animatronics for the various creatures, they look a bit goofy, but they have so much charm that it works splendidly. Overall, this is a blast, one I'll happily return to year after year.

First-off, it has to be said that Across the Spider-Verse has to be one of the most gorgeously-animated films of all time, with stunning direction and cinematography which make it feel like a comic brought to life. On top of that, the performances here are top-notch, with great humour and action as well. The only real issue I have with it is that it's a bit over-stuffed - the first Spider-Verse really benefitted from its strong focus on telling the story of Miles Morales, whereas Across the Spider-Verse's plot is kind of all over the place and (SPOILERS) ends on a cliff-hangar so there's no resolution. This could all come together next year when the conclusion is released, but for now it leaves Across the Spider-Verse's intriguing character and story developments up in the air until we know how well they can stick the landing.

Vol. 3 is easily the best Marvel project we've gotten in years. While it isn't quite as good as the first two, it's a fitting, emotional send-off that succeeds due to just how much we love these characters, how weird it is willing to be, and how unconcerned it is with the larger Marvel machine. Hell, it even does a great job reminding us why we all liked Chris Pratt all those years ago, he puts in some great work here with his roguish charms.

I'm a sucker for a raunchy, heart-felt romantic comedy and No Hard Feelings really scratched that itch. Also, you'd expect Jennifer Lawrence to be good (and she is), but Andrew Barth Feldman absolutely KILLS IT as the neurotic Percy.

M3GAN might disappoint some by not being scary at all, but otherwise this is a very well-executed film. First of all, the effects for the titular M3GAN are fantastic. If they're CGI, then it's completely seamless. If they're animatronics/puppets, then they're the most advanced animatronics I've ever seen. The film also manages to throw in some rather contemporary themes beyond the usual "science bad!", giving it a deeper resonance that it might be if it was just another killer doll movie.

Metalocalypse hasn't been great since season 2 (15 blood years ago!), with each successive season and project being rather uneven. So imagine my delight when, after years of silence, we not only got a finale, but that finale actually sticks the landing, giving fans the epic conclusion we have been waiting 10 years for.

Rise is the first Evil Dead movie in a long time to take the horror out of a cabin, this time in the same sort of serious, visceral style as the remake's continuity. While this film isn't quite as intense as the remake, it's still brutal and can even be more shocking since more than half of the cast in this movie are kids, and this film shows them absolutely no mercy. The film can be a bit too on the nose with its references, and it falls apart a bit at the very end, which gets just a bit too CGI for my tastes, but for the most part this is a bloody good nightmare.

Saw X is easily the best Saw sequel we've ever gotten, which is especially welcome after the last 3 films in the franchise have flailed, and failed, so badly. What's even more impressive is that it manages to recapture the spirit of the franchise, without aping its formula. Saw X is the only movie in this franchise laser-focused on the character of John Kramer first-and-foremost, and the only entry that gives us a chance to get to know the victims long before any horrors are unleashed on them. And when the torture does begin, it is absolutely GNARLY. My biggest concern is that Saw X doesn't really do anything to move the franchise forward narratively, which means that we might be stuck in the same place the franchise was before this, but if nothing else this has demonstrated that Saw still has life and there's room for a new formula if they can figure out how to go forward with it.

Thanksgiving is a delightfully nasty holiday slasher that's far better than it has any right to be. It's not nearly as grimy as the trailer it was based on, but it still goes to some pretty shocking places, with hilariously over the top gore and social commentary to boot.

Perhaps unsurprisingly, Mario Bros. is an enjoyable but very shallow film, buoyed by a snappy pace and game performances from Jack Black and Anya Taylor-Joy, which make up for the thin plotting and character writing. At its core though, this isn't much different than any other Illumination kids' movie, except that this time it's about a brand I had some fondness for.

The Flash is fun and occasionally shows some real promise, but it's hamstrung by some major issues. First of all, this has several of the worst CGI shots I've ever seen in a major blockbuster, and it completely overshadows the good effects (which are the majority of the shots). Secondly, Barry (and Barry) can be really annoying, with their shenanigans feeling like they just drag on too long. Thirdly, the movie's weighed down by how much fan service it shoves in. Like, this is supposed to be The Flash movie, but he's completely upstaged over and over again by all the more popular DC characters and doesn't get enough time to shine as his own thing. Also, there are some "fan service" moments towards the end which leave a really sour taste in my mouth. Finally, the movie really gets screwed over by virtue of being a Flashpoint story, rendering much of what happens pointless and making it feel like kind of a waste of time. I still had fun with The Flash, but looking back on it, it's frustrating how much potential it fails to achieve.

Rebel Moon is a transparent rip-off... er... "homage" to A New Hope and Seven Samurai, with unhealthy dosages of "inspiration" from Dune, Warhammer 40,000, and various other sci-fi properties. While unoriginal, this wouldn't be a problem if the execution was good (see: The Magnificent Seven), but unfortunately Rebel Moon completely fails to flesh out any of its characters, meaning that we have an unoriginal world with nothing to be interested in, and no characters to latch onto. Even the fight scenes aren't particularly noteworthy. I could get surprised, and Part Two could manage to right all my issues with Part One, but I'm not holding my breath at this point.

Look, if you're going to make a movie about a bear on cocaine going on a rampage, then you need to use that runtime showing the bear a) doing cocaine, and b) killing people in gnarly ways. What you don't do is instead focus on a bunch of annoying humans we don't care about. Maybe that's down to the budget and the R rating, but it doesn't make the end product any better. On top of all this, the third act is an absolute mess, with some of the most obviously hacked apart editing I've ever seen (seriously, we've got multiple characters who just disappear, character motivations completely changing, a flashback to a moment which must have happened like 5 minutes earlier, etc). Worst of all though, the movie just isn't very fun or funny. It's such a shame, I always loved the legend of Pablo Escobear and when I heard that they were going to use the story for inspiration for a bear rampage, I got very excited, but this is a massive disappointment.

Complain all you want about the in-your-face politics of this movie, but the real, crippling issue it faces is that it is criminally dull. For reference, the original Left Behind adapted all the material in this movie in a fairly brisk 1 hour of runtime. This movie stretches that out to 2 hours and it absolutely drags as a result. Add in some very lethargic performances (especially from ol' Sorbo himself) and the aforementioned ham-fisted politics, and this is a film that struggles to maintain interest.