1/10
Nick Jolley: The Man, The Mustache, The Dream
2 March 2003
If you enjoy the 70's, bell-bottoms, fake beards, Creepy Crawlers, or shoving a red hot needle in your eye then this is your movie! I, on the other hand, simply enjoy making fun of it.

It is simply bad. If it's not women being attacked by Creepy Crawlers and rubber snakes, it's a zombie who can't keep his Halloween teeth in his mouth. The lighting, sound, and sets are horrible (you can clearly see that Lucina's doctor and Dr. Specter's offices are the same friggin' room!) And the acting... oh the acting!

Of all the "actors" in Asylum, one stands out above the rest. One man whose blandness out-shines all the others. He likes his clothes groovy, his cars mustard yellow, and his hair, side-burns and mustache big... really really big. This man is Nick Jolley. He alone is worth seeing this movie for. I'm not saying he's talented. Far from it. He's just so bad, he's funny.

I would truly recommend this movie to anyone who enjoys watching really bad films and cracking-wise a la MST3K. It hurts, but with a few well-placed jokes and a few good friends to share them with, it goes down much easier.
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