Review of Stone Cold

Stone Cold (1991)
10/10
Boz=2 awesome 4 a shirt!
2 December 2001
You haven't seen this much male shirtlessness in a film since Planet of the Apes (1968). Boz struts his bare torso around and you know that was the reason the film was made. That and the thick, beefy one-liners delivered with a total absence of any emotion whatsoever.

Watching this historical nugget of 1991-era sensibilities was like hopping into the Wayback machine set for "LAME", though somehow it's entertaining. Perhaps that is the central mystery of the film: How can something so horrible be so AWESOME?!

Boz's hair defies both logic and taste and manages to evoke the diametrically opposed forces in early 1990's hairstyles: Thick product vs. rockin' windswept "do". Black roots juxtaposed with platinum blonde tresses hanging like a mudflap down his beefy neck while the top and sides are all "bidness" crewcut as evidenced by his ability to infiltrate both the Salsa club and the greasy biker compound.

Rent this movie and watch in rapt horror/delight as "The Boz" tears a searing hole into your heart!
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