Review of Hideaway

Hideaway (1995)
1/10
One of the worst movies ever made
10 February 2002
Warning: Spoilers
"Hideaway" was one of the worst films I have ever seen (and not in a "so bad it's good" way, either). It was a thoroughly pathetic and predictable supernatural thriller with zero mystery and uninspired performances. The opening car wreck is perhaps the most ineptly filmed in recent memory. **SPOILER** The identity of the killer is revealed way too soon, and when it is, it is as a heavy metal loser with the personality of a doorknob. Every time he shows up, we are "treated" to lame headbanger music (is that supposed to be scary or just sell copies of the soundtrack?). None of it makes any sense, nor does it ever really attempt to explain how or why any of the supernatural elements are occurring (particularly the painfully incompetent final confrontation between the forces of good and evil, with cornball dialogue like, "evil cannot survive in the light."). I couldn't believe this trash was ever released into theaters; it felt like a bad TV movie (and looked about as expensive).

As a final nail in the film's coffin, "Hideaway" suffers greatly under the remarkably ham-fisted direction of Brett Leonard, whose bizarre obsession with utilizing terrible computer animation (ala' his prior, and much better, film THE LAWNMOWER MAN) serves to completely undermine and destroy this picture.

I have not read the novel on which this is based, nor any of Dean Koontz's books, so do not take this as an attack on Mr. Koontz's writing ability (which hopefully is better than Hideaway's horrendously cliche'd screenplay would lead me to believe)... I rented "Hideaway" as half of a "2 videos for 99 cents" deal and felt cheated out of my rental fee, as the film failed to deliver even that miniscule amount of entertainment.

All I can say is: "Boo!!! Brett Leonard you owe me fifty cents!"

*throws popcorn at the screen*
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