1/10
Muuuust Resist! Do not Watch!
2 April 2004
This is one of the WORST movies I've ever seen. Why? Where to start, where to start?

How about dialogue? At one point in the movie, our hero John realizes that they are being watched by government agents. DOH! They followed them openly right to the house Why the look of shock? So, what does he do?

1 - Interrupts a conversation that sounds as normal as any in this movie

2 - Writes "Keep talking normal" on a newspaper on the table

3 - Puts his index finger to his mouth with the universal "shhh" sign (how does one "shhh" while talking normally?)

4 - Next, a looong 15 second pause in conversation

5 - Then this REALLY subtle line - "I'll be right back. Follow me. Keep an eye out" in a monotone voice; end of conversation.

Other really bad parts include the trimmed border and visible hinges around the "secret" trap door and, my favorite, a hidden CD picked up in a different location than where it was hidden in an earlier scene. Since both places had flags, I guess I wasn't supposed to notice. I could list more, but it hurts my brain to think about how bad this movie was.

So, the screenplay is bad. Cinematography is bad. DVD production is bad (what's with the Apache helicopters on the main menu graphics and not in the movie?). The acting is bad, but with this script, even Maria Conchita Alonzo and David Warner can't help it. The concept of the story is great, but the execution is simply horrible, the suspense is transparent (the sunglasses thing was SOOO obvious), and there is a lot of extraneous dialogue (keyless encryption). It wasn't a failure to suspend disbelief, it was a failure to get in the same universe with disbelief.

Maybe someone will take the works of Dan Brown and do something similar to this movie and do it right.
13 out of 87 found this helpful. Was this review helpful? Sign in to vote.
Permalink

Recently Viewed