The Glow (2002 TV Movie)
4/10
The Glow is Frustratingly Dim
31 August 2002
Warning: Spoilers
*This review has some minor spoilers.

I didn't want to watch This movie when I saw it listed. The description wasn't much, and the only stars it mentioned were Portia de Rossi and Dean Cain. I have liked Cain since his `Lois & Clark' days, but he along (I was not too familiar with de Rossi and am now not interested in being familiar with her) wasn't going to get me to see a suspense thriller. I accidentally flipped it to the channel it was playing on during the opening credits and spotted Hal Linden's name. Now that was enough to make me reconsider. But now I wish I hadn't. That's not saying that `The Glow' was a disaster, but it is far from good, unfortunately.

Cain and de Rossi play Matt and Jackie Lawrence, a well-off couple looking for a new place to live and hoping to have a baby. You know, it's kind of funny how pregnancy is treated in thrillers like this. People either live like everyone on the planet is sterile and doesn't have to worry about it or they desperately want a baby and can't get pregnant. Anyway, one day, while jogging in a park, Matt is mugged and his wallet and watch are stolen. Some elderly people that happen to be jogging in the same park see the incident and offer Matt their assistance. They take him to their home, a large, fancy apartment complex, where he meets all the residents, consisting of seven elderly people and a young married couple. One of the elderly couples own the building, and they like Matt so much that they offer him a recently vacated apartment for a reasonable price. And so Matt and Jackie move in. It doesn't take either Jackie or the viewer long to realize something is rotten in Denmark. The old people are sneaky, protective of the basement, and all develop a flu-like sickness whenever the seasons change. Most strangely is the way they are all health-conscious, jogging and working out all the time, drinking odd health drinks, and barking at Jackie for not exercising. Then the young couple upstairs disappears, leaving a vague note about how they moved away to the Caribbean. Suspicious (in a sort of stupid manner), Jackie has a friend start researching both the elderly couples and the previous tenants, which, naturally, leads to grim results which I won't reveal (though they are fairly predictable).

Perhaps I shouldn't expect a whole lot from a TV thriller, and I really didn't. I do expect a certain degree of logic like I would from any other movie, though. The twists in this movie aren't surprising to the viewer, but I wouldn't expect the characters to figure out what was happening too quickly because it is so ludicrous. I knew what was going on about fifteen minutes into the movie. What I didn't know was how all the sinister deeds were being committed. The movie was going along at a mediocre rating throughout, and the explanation would be what decided it all. I was still waiting for an explanation when the credits rolled. I was pretty annoyed by that, but you'll just have to experience it for yourself to understand. I will say that the unanswered questions (concerning how EVERYTHING was done, who the mysterious female jogger really is, and other dumb things) ruined everything. Craig R. Baxley is no slouch, but I can't figure out why he would spend so much time in the build up of the mystery and quickly wrap up the conclusion in the final ridiculous ten minutes. Worst of all, Hal Linden was misused. After playing such a good villain in `The Colony,' I was disappointed how he and the other elderly people were missing everything in terms of characterization. And then there is the confusing title. If you aren't listening carefully during the final ten minutes, you might miss what it means. Not that it really helps, since the final moments make the whole of `The Glow' pretty dim-witted. Zantara's Score: 4 out of 10.
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