1/10
doesn't even have juvenile appeal
23 January 2003
I honestly can't figure out why a bunch of old Italian exploitation regulars like Camillo Teti (who produced EXTERMINATORS OF THE YEAR 3000) and a zany cast including former a few former porn stars (David Brandon - CALIGULA: THE UNTOLD STORY) and Gregory Snegoff (who did the English language voice dubbing in a number of Anime cartoons, etc.) got together and just suddenly decided to make a Disney/Don Bluth-style animated film. To my knowledge, this is the first internationally released animated movie to come out of Italy, and after viewing it twice, I realize that it's probably for a very good reason.

The animation is actually surprisingly good in places considering the circumstances and the fact that this film was made really, really on the cheap. However, as I said, it is really cheapo, with lots of the same shots being used over and over again. Also a lot of the time the frame rate seems to be really slow, like 5-6 frames per second where most Disney movies are 24. Therefore the movement looks a lot less fluid, almost slideshow-like.

As for the plot and concept of the film itself, it fits well with the lack of technical razzle-dazzle by providing equally an underwhelming story. Basically, there's several stories going on at once, but the film is so short that nothing comes out of any of the stories. There's the typical boy-meets-girl love story, itself a thinly disguised CINDERELLA, plus a subplot involving a Cruella Deville-type crooked lady and her two bumbling henchmen, a story of a detective hunting down some diamond thieves, an aspiring Celine Dion-esque Diva, and several mice resembling the cast of AN AMERICAN TALE. None of these stories have any sort of plot arc and exist only as filler before the ship finally hits the iceberg and many of the annoying characters are unfortunately rescued. As for the not-so-lucky ones, the film just glosses right over that sordid chapter of the Titanic disaster, which historically was not all the fun-and-games that this movie depicts it to be.

To put it bluntly, most parents will be so shocked at the mere mention of the title of the film that they'd not even consider buying it for their children. Thus, this film was bound from the conception stage to wind up as a financial disaster - and another sad reminder as to why the Italian movie industry is on the rocks.
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