3/10
Quirk factor high, worth seeing
2 May 2005
Warning: Spoilers
This film is one of those movies I sit through ("Elephant Walk" being another good example) for the special effects laden climaxes. "The Rains" is one of the greatest examples of Hollywood miscasting and racial bait and switch ever. First we have Richard Burton as Dr. Safti, a HINDU doctor. He plays the role like a weak rabbit in costumes that make his macho form especially wimpy. Eugenie Leontovich plays the Grand Diva of Ranchipur "The Maharani" who tries valiantly to out-diva Lana Turner but alas, fails. Both are unconvincing but the camp factor is worth the experience. Fred MacMurray has a turn as a drunk with a heart of gold and Michael Rennie is wasted as Lana's husband. Then there is Ms. Turner. Playing a poor little rich girl to the hilt, she manages to be uber glamorous even in the midst of a deadly fever. The romance between Turner and Burton is embarrassing in a "I love you but I really can't back it up" kind of way, and you start rooting for the rains to do their thing. When they finally get going, it's a good old-fashioned disaster movie for a while with heroics all around, then it's back to the potboiler and a disappointing ending. If you want a fake Bollywood extravaganza with Lana Turner getting drenched in high heels, this is your film.

As a postscript to this review, if you want to see the real thing, check out the 1939 classic "The Rains Came", a much more entertaining, higher quality version with a very, very different outcome. It makes this one look like a bad made for TV movie.
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